Limerick Thread!

[icehog3]

New:

Sometimes I don't understand my wife,

She threatened me with a knife,

All I asked for was a threesome

With me, her and Liam Neeson,

[Mr B]

New:

Sometimes I don't understand my wife,

She threatened me with a knife,

All I asked for was a threesome

With me, her and Liam Neeson,


but she acted like it was the end of her life.

[Mr B]

New:

I saw an actress as skinny as a rail.

[Doctorossi]

And thought, "A burger- stat! Please inhale!"

[14holestogie]

I saw an actress as skinny as a rail.

And thought, "A burger- stat! Please inhale!"


I offered her an injection

[mariogolbee]

New:

I saw an actress as skinny as a rail.

And thought, "A burger- stat! Please inhale!"

I offered her an injection

And a Gynecological inspection,

[mikethegoalie32]

And a Gynecological inspection,

1 year later she was as big as a whale

[mikethegoalie32]

New:
Holy Moly my secretary is hot

[Gophernut]

New:
Holy Moly my secretary is hot

But the HR pukes say touch her not,

[Chainsaw13]

Holy Moly my secretary is hot

But the HR pukes say touch her not,

It's hard to resist that keester of hers.

[VTDragon]

New:
Holy Moly my secretary is hot

But the HR pukes say touch her not,

It's hard to resist that keester of hers.
Too bad it's other women she prefers

[mikethegoalie32]

Too bad it's other women she prefers

And thats why I havent seen what shes got.

[mikethegoalie32]

New:
An apple a day keeps the doctor away,

[Doctorossi]

and the scent of my stog' keeps the whiners at bay.

[mikethegoalie32]

The smell of my feet keep my friends crying,

[Mr B]

New:
An apple a day keeps the doctor away,

and the scent of my stog' keeps the whiners at bay.

The smell of my feet keep my friends crying,



they say bacon fat speeds up your dying.

[mikethegoalie32]

Thus a bacon wrapped apple makes everything OK

[mikethegoalie32]

New:
It is really fun watching people get old,

[Gophernut]

New:
It is really fun watching people get old,

And hearing stories that they've already told,

[BloodSpite]

The smells of Ben Gay, Icy Hot, Preparation H

[Gophernut]

New:
It is really fun watching people get old,

And hearing stories that they've already told,

The smells of Ben Gay, Icy Hot, Preparation H

Playing bridge with Mabel, Ethel, and Rache,

[VTDragon]

New:
It is really fun watching people get old,

And hearing stories that they've already told,

The smells of Ben Gay, Icy Hot, Preparation H

Playing bridge with Mabel, Ethel, and Rache,
Much better than being in a box and slowly turning to mold

[VTDragon]

New:
On Dasher, on Dancer, on Cupid and Vixen

[icehog3]

New:
On Dasher, on Dancer, on Cupid and Vixen

Start cutting my cigars, and my drinks get a mixin,'

[Mr B]

New:
On Dasher, on Dancer, on Cupid and Vixen

Start cutting my cigars, and my drinks get a mixin,'



a couple of shots and she's feelin' frisky

[icehog3]

On Dasher, on Dancer, on Cupid and Vixen

Start cutting my cigars, and my drinks get a mixin,'

a couple of shots and she's feelin' frisky

To do a reindeer, I'll need some whiskey,

[Mr B]

New:
On Dasher, on Dancer, on Cupid and Vixen

Start cutting my cigars, and my drinks get a mixin,'

a couple of shots and she's feelin' frisky

On Dasher, on Dancer, on Cupid and Vixen

Start cutting my cigars, and my drinks get a mixin,'



To do a reindeer, I'll need some whiskey,

Tom, I think your brain needs some fixin'

[Mr B]

New:

The Stockings are fillin' with some good things.

[icehog3]

New:

The Stockings are fillin' with some good things.

Baby's breath and butterfly wings,


(Is that better? :r :r )

[Mr B]

New:

The Stockings are fillin' with some good things.

Baby's breath and butterfly wings,


(Is that better? :r :r )

a little hot sauce and some BBQ rub

[icehog3]

New:

The Stockings are fillin' with some good things.

Baby's breath and butterfly wings,




a little hot sauce and some BBQ rub

And some substance I found in the tub,

[mikethegoalie32]

I have now developed a rash and wow it stings.

New:
My Bologna has a first name,

[VTDragon]

New:
My Bologna has a first name,
You may think that naming it is lame

[Doctorossi]

but it speaks to me in the dark

[icehog3]

New:
My Bologna has a first name,

You may think that naming it is lame

but it speaks to me in the dark

And is made with the innards of a shark,

[Gophernut]

New:
My Bologna has a first name,

You may think that naming it is lame

but it speaks to me in the dark

And is made with the innards of a shark,

Identifying the different chunks is a fun game.

[Gophernut]

New:
Watching pigeons in the park,

[icehog3]

New:
Watching pigeons in the park,

I see one get attacked by an aardvark,

[BloodSpite]

I see one get attacked by an aardvark,


For Mother it screamed

[mikethegoalie32]

For Mother it screamed

and in pain it seemed

[VTDragon]

New:
Watching pigeons in the park,

I see one get attacked by an aardvark,

For Mother it screamed

and in pain it seemed
Watch the video on Drew Curtises' Fark

[VTDragon]

New:

December 17th, might be time to start Christmas shopping

[Gophernut]

New:

December 17th, might be time to start Christmas shopping

The malls, they are hopping,

[Mr B]

New:

December 17th, might be time to start Christmas shopping

The malls, they are hopping,

a sale at this store....free shipping from this site...

[BloodSpite]

a sale at this store....free shipping from this site...

A reminder that online, the crowds do not bite

[icehog3]

New:

December 17th, might be time to start Christmas shopping

The malls, they are hopping,

a sale at this store....free shipping from this site...

A reminder that online, the crowds do not bite

But still my bank balance keep dropping.

[icehog3]

NEW:

There once was a man from Detroit,

[gorob23]

NEW:

There once was a man from Detroit,

Who's exploits at the Beach were well known :tf

Rob :tpd:

[icehog3]

Who's exploits at the Beach were well known :tf

Rob :tpd:

You've been rolling your own again, haven't you? :r

[Mr B]

NEW:

There once was a man from Detroit,

other teams his RedWings did exploit

[Doctorossi]

He was turned off of hockey forever.

[Mr B]

NEW:

There once was a man from Detroit,

other teams his RedWings did exploit

He was turned off of hockey forever.

cuz skating while on acid was not clever

[VTDragon]

NEW:

There once was a man from Detroit,

other teams his RedWings did exploit

He was turned off of hockey forever.

cuz skating while on acid was not clever
Even though he deemed himself quite adroit

[VTDragon]

New:

Boston's pro teams are doing quite well

[BloodSpite]

New:

Boston's pro teams are doing quite well

The Curse of the Bambino has fell

[Mr B]

New:

Boston's pro teams are doing quite well

The Curse of the Bambino has fell

problem is, their fans all talk funny

[Doctorossi]

And, do they buy their success with big money?

[icehog3]

New:

Boston's pro teams are doing quite well

The Curse of the Bambino has fell

problem is, their fans all talk funny

And, do they buy their success with big money?

I hope Tom Brady falls down a well.

[icehog3]

NEW:

My best friend is really a slob,

[Mr B]

NEW:

My best friend is really a slob,

so I told him to go Bob-Some-Knob

[icehog3]

NEW:

My best friend is really a slob,

so I told him to go Bob-Some-Knob

Then I realized that was rude,

[TheTraveler]

My best friend is really a slob,

so I told him to go Bob-Some-Knob

Then I realized that was rude,

And he's not the type of dude

[Gophernut]

NEW:

My best friend is really a slob,

so I told him to go Bob-Some-Knob

Then I realized that was rude,

And he's not the type of dude

And he'd probably do a terrible job.

[Gophernut]

The first of 3 Christmas parties is tonight,

[Ogre]

So I must be polite,

[icehog3]

The first of 3 Christmas parties is tonight,

So I must be polite,

I'll say "how do you do",

[Mr B]

The first of 3 Christmas parties is tonight,

So I must be polite,

I'll say "how do you do",

and chug a drink or two

[icehog3]

The first of 3 Christmas parties is tonight,

So I must be polite,

I'll say "how do you do",

and chug a drink or two

And try not to get in a fight.

[icehog3]

NEW:

Lebron decided to go with the Heat,

[Doctorossi]

and about that, he wasn't discrete.

[icehog3]

NEW:

Lebron decided to go with the Heat,

and about that, he wasn't discrete.

He came off like a boob,

[Doctorossi]

with his tease on the tube,

[VTDragon]

NEW:

Lebron decided to go with the Heat,

and about that, he wasn't discrete.

He came off like a boob,

with his tease on the tube,
Then the old Celtics came to town and the Heat, they got beat

[VTDragon]

New:

The Giants imploded on Sunday

[Gophernut]

New:

The Giants imploded on Sunday

The punter, with his job, will surely pay,

[mikethegoalie32]

the giants coach was none too happy,

[Gophernut]

New:

The Giants imploded on Sunday

The punter, with his job, will surely pay,

the giants coach was none too happy,

he said he never felt that crappy,

[Doctorossi]

but at least he didn't have to play.

[Doctorossi]

New:

Can't I just get one day's worth of sunshine?

[VTDragon]

New:

Can't I just get one day's worth of sunshine?
If not, I may dip into the moonshine

[mikethegoalie32]

I hear there is a full lunar eclipse coming,

[Gophernut]

New:

Can't I just get one day's worth of sunshine?

If not, I may dip into the moonshine

I hear there is a full lunar eclipse coming,

It snowing out so I'm bumming,

[VTDragon]

New:

Can't I just get one day's worth of sunshine?

If not, I may dip into the moonshine

I hear there is a full lunar eclipse coming,

It snowing out so I'm bumming,
I'll just drink through the night and then I'll be fine.

[VTDragon]

New:

Saw a reindeer with a shiny red nose

[Doctorossi]

He was wearing the most garish clothes.

[Mr B]

New:

Saw a reindeer with a shiny red nose

He was wearing the most garish clothes.

His nose was red form all the Rum

[landhoney]

New:

Saw a reindeer with a shiny red nose

He was wearing the most garish clothes.

His nose was red form all the Rum

And he began to loudly hum

[icehog3]

New:

Saw a reindeer with a shiny red nose

He was wearing the most garish clothes.

His nose was red form all the Rum

And he began to loudly hum

But quickly forgot how the melody goes.

[icehog3]

NEW:

Throw another yule log on the fire,

[VTDragon]

NEW:

Throw another yule log on the fire,
Keep the temperature up, I'm starting to tire

[Doctorossi]

Don't get singed lighting up,

[VTDragon]

NEW:

Throw another yule log on the fire,

Keep the temperature up, I'm starting to tire

Don't get singed lighting up,
And be sure to fill up your cup

[Mr B]

NEW:

Throw another yule log on the fire,

Keep the temperature up, I'm starting to tire

Don't get singed lighting up,

And be sure to fill up your cup

and Santa will bring what you desire.

[Mr B]

New:

So many snacks, so many sweets

[Doctorossi]

but cigars are no-calorie treats!

[icehog3]

New:

So many snacks, so many sweets

but cigars are no-calorie treats!

So I will huff, and I will puff,

[Mr B]

New:

So many snacks, so many sweets

but cigars are no-calorie treats!

So I will huff, and I will puff,


and with Homer, drink a Duff

[icehog3]

New:

So many snacks, so many sweets

but cigars are no-calorie treats!

So I will huff, and I will puff,

and with Homer, drink a Duff

And avoid all the high calorie meats.

[icehog3]

NEW:


It takes a wise man to decipher,

[BloodSpite]

A motivated man to inspire

[VTDragon]

NEW:


It takes a wise man to decipher,

A motivated man to inspire
A generous man to donate

[BloodSpite]

A generous man to donate

A patient man to hold prostate

[Gophernut]

NEW:


It takes a wise man to decipher,

A motivated man to inspire

A generous man to donate

A patient man to hold prostate

And a fisherman to know a liar.

[Gophernut]

New:
Not too many days left this year,

[BloodSpite]

New:
Not too many days left this year,

Leaving little time to consume great beer

[VTDragon]

New:
Not too many days left this year,

Leaving little time to consume great beer
Can't wait too long, it gets skunky

[BloodSpite]

Can't wait too long, it gets skunky

The after taste? A little funky

[landhoney]

New:
Not too many days left this year,

Leaving little time to consume great beer

Can't wait too long, it gets skunky

The after taste? A little funky

But it still plants me square on my rear!

[landhoney]

New:

I zip through holiday traffic with ease

[icehog3]

New:

I zip through holiday traffic with ease

While taking a lesson in Japanese,

[Mr B]

New:

I zip through holiday traffic with ease

While taking a lesson in Japanese,


My Electric Car goes kinda slow

[icehog3]

New:

I zip through holiday traffic with ease

While taking a lesson in Japanese,

My Electric Car goes kinda slow

While I practice, and say "Ah so",

[Mr B]

New:

I zip through holiday traffic with ease

While taking a lesson in Japanese,

My Electric Car goes kinda slow

While I practice, and say "Ah so",


Funny how their recipes dont contain much cheese.

[Mr B]

New:

Often times I have to wonder...

[Doctorossi]

shall I err or just blunder?

[icehog3]

New:

Often times I have to wonder...

shall I err or just blunder?

All it takes is one mistake,

[Mr B]

New:

Often times I have to wonder...

shall I err or just blunder?

All it takes is one mistake,


under her weight I will surely break.

[icehog3]

New:

Often times I have to wonder...

shall I err or just blunder?

All it takes is one mistake,

under her weight I will surely break.

As she is the "Goddess of Thunder".

[icehog3]

NEW:

My dog just buried a bone,

[Chainsaw13]

NEW:

My dog just buried a bone,

Now he looks sad and all alone,

[icehog3]

NEW:

My dog just buried a bone,

Now he looks sad and all alone,

He searches for another,

[VTDragon]

NEW:

My dog just buried a bone,

Now he looks sad and all alone,

He searches for another,
to bring home to his mother

[icehog3]

NEW:

My dog just buried a bone,

Now he looks sad and all alone,

He searches for another,

to bring home to his mother

Christmas love for his mother he had shown.

[icehog3]

NEW:

Another Christmas has come and gone,

[Mr B]

NEW:

Another Christmas has come and gone,

but oh, how the kids love that Christmas dawn.

[landhoney]

NEW:

Another Christmas has come and gone,

but oh, how the kids love that Christmas dawn.

Solace is found in The Shack drawing nearer

[icehog3]

NEW:

Another Christmas has come and gone,

but oh, how the kids love that Christmas dawn.

Solace is found in The Shack drawing nearer

So I can drink rum, vodka and beerer,

[VTDragon]

NEW:

Another Christmas has come and gone,

but oh, how the kids love that Christmas dawn.

Solace is found in The Shack drawing nearer

So I can drink rum, vodka and beerer,
Soon a drinking, smoking, fun filled New Year will dawn

[VTDragon]

New:
Big blizzard is whalloping the East

[Mr B]

New:
Big blizzard is whalloping the East



In the winter, that coast, I like the least.

[Scottw]

New:
Big blizzard is whalloping the East

In the winter, that coast, I like the least.

While the snow is pretty and white

[Mr B]

New:
Big blizzard is whalloping the East

In the winter, that coast, I like the least.

While the snow is pretty and white

driving in it can make you pucker tight

[Scottw]

Man, Old Man Winter is a Beast!

[Scottw]

NEW: The Jets made the playoffs, that blows.

[Mr B]

NEW: The Jets made the playoffs, that blows.


and the Cheifs blocked the Raiders playoff hopes dont ya knows

[Scottw]

and the Cheifs blocked the Raiders playoff hopes dont ya knows

NEW: The Jets made the playoffs, that blows.

"Cheifs" is a typographical error.

[icehog3]

NEW: The Jets made the playoffs, that blows.

and the Cheifs blocked the Raiders playoff hopes dont ya knows

"Cheifs" is a typographical error.

And Julius Peppers is a terror,

[Scottw]

NEW: The Jets made the playoffs, that blows.

and the Cheifs blocked the Raiders playoff hopes dont ya knows

"Cheifs" is a typographical error.

And Julius Peppers is a terror,

And Rex Ryan sucks his wife's toes.

[VTDragon]

And Rex Ryan sucks his wife's toes.
:xxx I laughed out loud...good one :ss

[VTDragon]

Since Scott doesn't seem to want to start a new one, I will:

The sun is shining , the blizzard has passed

[Scottw]

Since Scott doesn't seem to want to start a new one, I will:

My Bad, got tied up

The sun is shining , the blizzard has passed

Gosh I love shoveling, ooh what a blast.

[icehog3]

Since Scott doesn't seem to want to start a new one, I will:

The sun is shining , the blizzard has passed

Gosh I love shoveling, ooh what a blast.

But my toes are still frozen,

[VTDragon]

The sun is shining , the blizzard has passed

Gosh I love shoveling, ooh what a blast.

But my toes are still frozen,
Makes me wonder why, to live way up north, I have chosen

[icehog3]

Since Scott doesn't seem to want to start a new one, I will:

The sun is shining , the blizzard has passed

Gosh I love shoveling, ooh what a blast.

But my toes are still frozen,

Makes me wonder why, to live way up north, I have chosen

I am heading to Florida, and fast!

[icehog3]

NEW:

I once knew a BOTL named Chingas,

[VTDragon]

NEW:

I once knew a BOTL named Chingas,
A Jersey guy who smoked cigars, not grass

[Doctorossi]

He'd smoke one, then bomb five

[Mr B]

NEW:

I once knew a BOTL named Chingas,

A Jersey guy who smoked cigars, not grass

He'd smoke one, then bomb five

and that aint no Jive

[14holestogie]

NEW:

I once knew a BOTL named Chingas,

A Jersey guy who smoked cigars, not grass

He'd smoke one, then bomb five

and that aint no Jive

Death is Waiting, none for me, thanks, I'll pass

[14holestogie]

New:

Winter sux, then it blows

[icehog3]

New:

Winter sux, then it blows

I wish 10 feet of snow on my foes,

[Mr B]

New:

Winter sux, then it blows

I wish 10 feet of snow on my foes,

we hope the next season will come soon

[icehog3]

New:

Winter sux, then it blows

I wish 10 feet of snow on my foes,

we hope the next season will come soon

So our best friend, pnoon,

[Mr B]

New:

Winter sux, then it blows

I wish 10 feet of snow on my foes,

we hope the next season will come soon

So our best friend, pnoon,

can unwrap his frostbit toes

[Mr B]

New:

The Bombs keep dropping left & right

[icehog3]

New:

The Bombs keep dropping left & right

Though not all know how to do it right,

[Mr B]

New:

The Bombs keep dropping left & right

Though not all know how to do it right,

Some send a 5er, others a box.

[Doctorossi]

Whatever you send, it's the sending that rocks!

[icehog3]

New:

The Bombs keep dropping left & right

Though not all know how to do it right,

Some send a 5er, others a box.

Whatever you send, it's the sending that rocks!

Try sending with no warning...gives it more might.

[icehog3]

NEW:

2 more days until 2011,

[Gophernut]

NEW:

2 more days until 2011,

This year is almost done, thank Heaven,

[Scottw]

NEW:

2 more days until 2011,

This year is almost done, thank Heaven,

I won't miss this past year.

[icehog3]

NEW:

2 more days until 2011,

This year is almost done, thank Heaven,

I won't miss this past year.

So I'll give out a little cheer,

[Mr B]

NEW:

2 more days until 2011,

This year is almost done, thank Heaven,

I won't miss this past year.

So I'll give out a little cheer,

and spend more time with Kevin. :sh

[Mr B]

New:

New Years Eve is finally here!

[icehog3]

New:

New Years Eve is finally here!

Now go and get me a friggin' beer,

[14holestogie]

New:

New Years Eve is finally here!

Now go and get me a friggin' beer,

and make me a sammich while you're at it

[Mr B]

New:

New Years Eve is finally here!

Now go and get me a friggin' beer,

and make me a sammich while you're at it


and dont go givin me any static

[VTDragon]

New:

New Years Eve is finally here!

Now go and get me a friggin' beer,

and make me a sammich while you're at it

and dont go givin me any static
Happy smokin', drinkin', friggin' New Year!

[VTDragon]

New:

Is it two thousand eleven or twenty eleven?

[Mr B]

New:

Is it two thousand eleven or twenty eleven?


The Mega Millions is huge so play # 7

[Scottw]

New:

Is it two thousand eleven or twenty eleven?

The Mega Millions is huge so play # 7

Odds are you won't win.................

[VTDragon]

New:

Is it two thousand eleven or twenty eleven?

The Mega Millions is huge so play # 7

Odds are you won't win.................
So try not to bet more than a fin

[icehog3]

New:

Is it two thousand eleven or twenty eleven?

The Mega Millions is huge so play # 7

Odds are you won't win.................

So try not to bet more than a fin

If I win, my new Ferrari will be revvin'....

[icehog3]

NEW:

She told me the rabbit done died,

[VTDragon]

NEW:

She told me the rabbit done died,
I'm really excited, I lied

[icehog3]

NEW:

She told me the rabbit done died,

I'm really excited, I lied

I'll deny all paternity,

[Mr B]

NEW:

She told me the rabbit done died,

I'm really excited, I lied

I'll deny all paternity,

Remember, Hell is Eternity

[icehog3]

NEW:

She told me the rabbit done died,

I'm really excited, I lied

I'll deny all paternity,

Remember, Hell is Eternity

So my choices; play Daddy or get fried.

[icehog3]

NEW:

I knew I should have stayed in bed,

[pnoon]

NEW:

I knew I should have stayed in bed,

Slipped and fell and konked my head

[icehog3]

NEW:

I knew I should have stayed in bed,

Slipped and fell and konked my head

Then I stepped on a lizard,

[14holestogie]

I knew I should have stayed in bed,

Slipped and fell and konked my head

Then I stepped on a lizard,

That was dressed as a wizard

[icehog3]

NEW:

I knew I should have stayed in bed,

Slipped and fell and konked my head

Then I stepped on a lizard,

That was dressed as a wizard

And p-wizard said the lizard was dead!

[icehog3]

NEW:

I once had a friend named Peter,

[VTDragon]

NEW:

I once had a friend named Peter,
In all things he was a scoundrel and cheater

[icehog3]

NEW:

I once had a friend named Peter,

In all things he was a scoundrel and cheater

He showed me four aces,

[VTDragon]

NEW:

I once had a friend named Peter,

In all things he was a scoundrel and cheater

He showed me four aces,
Of his cheating, I could find no traces

[icehog3]

NEW:

I once had a friend named Peter,

In all things he was a scoundrel and cheater

He showed me four aces,

Of his cheating, I could find no traces

So I danced on "Sprockets" with Dieter.

[icehog3]

NEW:

Once while eating a waffle,

[14holestogie]

Once while eating a waffle,

Not blue I hope, those things are awful.

[icehog3]

NEW:

Once while eating a waffle,

Not blue I hope, those things are awful.

It might have been lemon,

[VTDragon]

NEW:

Once while eating a waffle,

Not blue I hope, those things are awful.

It might have been lemon,
As it came with a piece of salmon

[Mr B]

NEW:

Once while eating a waffle,

Not blue I hope, those things are awful.

It might have been lemon,

As it came with a piece of salmon

So I got out my Hummas and ate it like Falafel

[Mr B]

New:

The days grow colder and shorter

[icehog3]

New:

The days grow colder and shorter

I might make a run for the border,

[Mr B]

New:

The days grow colder and shorter

I might make a run for the border,


Is this Mexico or Taco Bell?

[icehog3]

New:

The days grow colder and shorter

I might make a run for the border,

Is this Mexico or Taco Bell?

Maybe Juarez, maybe Hell,

[Mr B]

New:

The days grow colder and shorter

I might make a run for the border,

Is this Mexico or Taco Bell?

Maybe Juarez, maybe Hell,

Just make sure to avoid the Extorter.

[Mr B]

New:

Having this cold, is no fun at all.

[icehog3]

New:

Having this cold, is no fun at all.

Can't sleep, can't smoke, can't even ball,

[VTDragon]

New:

Having this cold, is no fun at all.

Can't sleep, can't smoke, can't even ball,
I'm thinking of trying the hard liquor cure

[Mr B]

New:

Having this cold, is no fun at all.

Can't sleep, can't smoke, can't even ball,

I'm thinking of trying the hard liquor cure


White Lightning will melt this phlem for sure.

[icehog3]

New:

Having this cold, is no fun at all.

Can't sleep, can't smoke, can't even ball,

I'm thinking of trying the hard liquor cure

White Lightning will melt this phlem for sure.

And then I can ball one and all.

[icehog3]

NEW:

What comes after the diamond ring?,

[Mr B]

NEW:

What comes after the diamond ring?,

Begging and pleading to your new "sure thing"

[icehog3]

NEW:

What comes after the diamond ring?,

Begging and pleading to your new "sure thing"

She'll get lots of headaches,

[Mr B]

NEW:

What comes after the diamond ring?,

Begging and pleading to your new "sure thing"

She'll get lots of headaches,


and inform you daily when her heartbreaks

[icehog3]

NEW:

What comes after the diamond ring?,

Begging and pleading to your new "sure thing"

She'll get lots of headaches,

and inform you daily when her heartbreaks

So the rest of your life is spent suffer-ring. ;)

[icehog3]

NEW:

They reposseseed my trailer today,

[Mr B]

NEW:

They reposseseed my trailer today,

you were on an eppisode "Cops" you say

[icehog3]

NEW:

They reposseseed my trailer today,

you were on an eppisode "Cops" you say

A hillbilly in a tow truck,

[VTDragon]

NEW:

They reposseseed my trailer today,

you were on an eppisode "Cops" you say

A hillbilly in a tow truck,
Pulled away with trailer and wife, what luck!

[Mr B]

NEW:

They reposseseed my trailer today,

you were on an eppisode "Cops" you say

A hillbilly in a tow truck,

Pulled away with trailer and wife, what luck!


Can I gat a hip hip horray

[Mr B]

Nerw

So many Christmas treats left over

[Chainsaw13]

So many Christmas treats left over

There's to many to eat, here you go Rover.

[Mr B]

Nerw

So many Christmas treats left over

There's to many to eat, here you go Rover.

The pounds packed on two by two

[VTDragon]

Nerw

So many Christmas treats left over

There's too many to eat, here you go Rover.

The pounds packed on two by two
I looked in the mirror surprised. Is that still you?

[Mr B]

Nerw

So many Christmas treats left over

There's to many to eat, here you go Rover.

The pounds packed on two by two

I looked in the mirror surprised. Is that still you?

Gonna need PX90 and a 4 leaf clover.

[Mr B]

New:

I start the morning with a nice cup of Joe

[icehog3]

New:

I start the morning with a nice cup of Joe

It helps to make the juices flow,

[Mr B]

New:

I start the morning with a nice cup of Joe

It helps to make the juices flow,


The Sharks got thumped zero to three

[Gophernut]

New:

I start the morning with a nice cup of Joe

It helps to make the juices flow,

The Sharks got thumped zero to three

They couldn't get a puck past Niittymaki

[Mr B]

They couldn't get a puck past Niittymaki

Actually they got 3 :r

[Gophernut]

Actually they got 3 :r

Yipes, read the score wrong....

[Gophernut]

New:

I start the morning with a nice cup of Joe

It helps to make the juices flow,

The Sharks got thumped zero to three

(Revised to insure historical accuracy, doh )

They sure could have used some Paul Coffey,

[VTDragon]

New:

I start the morning with a nice cup of Joe

It helps to make the juices flow,

The Sharks got thumped zero to three

They sure could have used some Paul Coffey,
Then they wouldn't have lost two in a row

[VTDragon]

New:

First round of NFL playoffs this weekend

[icehog3]

New:

First round of NFL playoffs this weekend

Some beers will be drank, some elbows will bend,

[Mr B]

New:

First round of NFL playoffs this weekend

Some beers will be drank, some elbows will bend,

Chips, Dips, Booze and Wings

[icehog3]

New:

First round of NFL playoffs this weekend

Some beers will be drank, some elbows will bend,

Chips, Dips, Booze and Wings

Strippers, (take off those wedding rings),

[VTDragon]

New:

First round of NFL playoffs this weekend

Some beers will be drank, some elbows will bend,

Chips, Dips, Booze and Wings

Strippers, (take off those wedding rings),
The good teams begin to seperate from those that were just playing pretend

[VTDragon]

New:
Sittin' by the fire, football on TV

[icehog3]

New:
Sittin' by the fire, football on TV

Turned off the audio and turned on Stevie,

[VTDragon]

New:
Sittin' by the fire, football on TV

Turned off the audio and turned on Stevie,
My team was winning, so all was good

[icehog3]

New:
Sittin' by the fire, football on TV

Turned off the audio and turned on Stevie,

My team was winning, so all was good

Felt like a kid in Mr. Roger's Neighborhood,

[VTDragon]

New:
Sittin' by the fire, football on TV

Turned off the audio and turned on Stevie,

My team was winning, so all was good

Felt like a kid in Mr. Roger's Neighborhood,
Then the wife came in and switched the channel to Glee

[VTDragon]

New:

Still digging out from the recent big snow

[icehog3]

New:

Still digging out from the recent big snow

All this shoveling is starting to blow,

[VTDragon]

New:

Still digging out from the recent big snow

All this shoveling is starting to blow,
Takin' time out to have a good smoke

[Mr B]

New:

Still digging out from the recent big snow

All this shoveling is starting to blow,

Takin' time out to have a good smoke


"My feet are freezin" said the Bloke.

[VTDragon]

New:

Still digging out from the recent big snow

All this shoveling is starting to blow,

Takin' time out to have a good smoke

"My feet are freezin" said the Bloke.
Go get Coach Ryan to suck on my toe

[VTDragon]

New:

Snow is present in 49 of the 50 states

[icehog3]

New:

Snow is present in 49 of the 50 states

A guy stays home and masturbates,

[Mr B]

New:

Snow is present in 49 of the 50 states

A guy stays home and masturbates,


Right or Left...he cant decide.

[icehog3]

New:

Snow is present in 49 of the 50 states

A guy stays home and masturbates,

Right or Left...he cant decide.

Maybe he'll get a mail-order bride,

[VTDragon]

New:

Snow is present in 49 of the 50 states

A guy stays home and masturbates,

Right or Left...he cant decide.

Maybe he'll get a mail-order bride,
Otherwise, until springtime he waits

[VTDragon]

New:

Just a week before I head south for some golf

[icehog3]

New:

Just a week before I head south for some golf

I hired a caddie named Rolf,

[VTDragon]

New:

Just a week before I head south for some golf

I hired a caddie named Rolf,
He knows Jack about golf, but lights my cigars