Pathetic groaner

nutcracker · 09-25-2015, 05:04 PM

Researchers for the Massachusetts Turnpike Authority found over 200 dead crows near greater Boston recently, and there was concern that they may have died from Avian flu.
A bird pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was definitely NOT Avian flu. The cause of death appeared to be vehicular impacts.

However, during the detailed analysis it was noted that varying colors of paints appeared on the bird's beaks and claws. By analyzing these paint residues it was determined that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with trucks, while only 2% were killed by an impact with a car.

MTA then hired an ornithological behaviorist to determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of truck kills versus car kills.

He very quickly concluded the cause: when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow in a nearby tree to warn of impending

danger. They discovered that while all the look-out crows could shout "Cah", not a single one could shout "Truck."
__________________

The Poet · 09-25-2015, 05:18 PM

A muhduh of crows.

big_jaygee · 09-25-2015, 06:25 PM

shark · 09-26-2015, 10:40 AM

Ayuh, that's a good one theyah!

Dave128 · 09-30-2015, 09:36 AM

LOL!

CigarNut · 10-02-2015, 08:06 AM

AdamJoshua · 10-04-2015, 07:07 PM

Ugh I never should have left the bah, but wicked pissah joke!

09-25-2015, 05:04 PM	#1
nutcracker Shameless epicurian Join Date: Apr 2014 First Name: Neil Location: Winnipeg, Canada - Home of the Jets! Posts: 1,631 Trading: (26)	Pathetic groaner Researchers for the Massachusetts Turnpike Authority found over 200 dead crows near greater Boston recently, and there was concern that they may have died from Avian flu. A bird pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was definitely NOT Avian flu. The cause of death appeared to be vehicular impacts. However, during the detailed analysis it was noted that varying colors of paints appeared on the bird's beaks and claws. By analyzing these paint residues it was determined that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with trucks, while only 2% were killed by an impact with a car. MTA then hired an ornithological behaviorist to determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of truck kills versus car kills. He very quickly concluded the cause: when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow in a nearby tree to warn of impending danger. They discovered that while all the look-out crows could shout "Cah", not a single one could shout "Truck." __________________ __________________ "Well I ain't often right but I've never been wrong.... Jerry Garcia (R.I.P.)

09-25-2015, 05:18 PM	#2
The Poet Il megglior fabbro Join Date: Jun 2009 First Name: Thomas Location: Hickory, NC Posts: 8,420 Trading: (2)	Re: Pathetic groaner A muhduh of crows. __________________ Ninety percent of everything is crap - Theodore Sturgeon.

09-25-2015, 06:25 PM	#3
big_jaygee I'm nuts for the place Join Date: Dec 2012 First Name: Jason Location: Houston Posts: 3,914 Trading: (59)	Re: Pathetic groaner

09-26-2015, 10:40 AM	#4
shark Cigar Smokin' Patriot Join Date: Sep 2009 First Name: Ron Location: Michigan Posts: 3,444 Trading: (0)	Re: Pathetic groaner Ayuh, that's a good one theyah! __________________ Emancipate yourselves from mental slavery None but ourselves can free our minds

09-30-2015, 09:36 AM	#5
Dave128 Sexy Dave Join Date: Feb 2009 First Name: Dave Location: Voorheesville, NY Posts: 3,917 Trading: (4)	Re: Pathetic groaner LOL! __________________ "Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." - Benjamin Franklin I "heart" Boobies and Beer!

10-02-2015, 08:06 AM	#6
CigarNut Fck Cancer! Join Date: Jan 2009 First Name: Michael Location: Clermont, Florida Posts: 18,038 Trading: (111*)	Re: Pathetic groaner __________________ Need Beads? Need Five Finger Bags? 2 of 3 Requirements for use of the CA Rolodex: 100 posts/ 60 day membership/ participation in trade (trader rating). New members can be added at any time.

10-04-2015, 07:07 PM	#7
AdamJoshua Article 4 Free Inhabitant Join Date: Jan 2013 First Name: The Other Adam Location: Satellite Beach Posts: 14,785 Trading: (40)	Re: Pathetic groaner Ugh I never should have left the bah, but wicked pissah joke!