Drunk Driver

dunng · 12-19-2008, 05:34 AM

Recently a routine police patrol parked outside a bar in Orange Beach, Alabama, noticed a man leaving the bar so apparently intoxicated that he could barely walk.

The man stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing.

After what seemed an eternity in which he tried his keys on five different vehicles, the man managed to find his car and fall into it. He sat there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off. Finally he started the car, switched the wipers on and off--it was a fine, dry summer night, flicked the blinkers on and off a couple of times, honked the horn and then switched on the lights.

He moved the vehicle forward a few inches, reversed a little and then remained still for a few more minutes as some more of the other patrons' vehicles left. At last, when his was the only car left in the parking lot, he pulled out and drove slowly down the road. The police officer, having waited patiently all this time, now started up his patrol car, put on the flashing lights, promptly pulled the man over and administered a breathalyzer test.

To his amazement, the breathalyzer indicated no evidence that the man had consumed any alcohol at all! Dumbfounded, the officer said, I'll have to ask you to accompany me to the police station. This breathalyzer equipment must be broken.'

'I doubt it,' said the truly proud Redneck. 'Tonight I'm the Designated decoy.

* I no way condone drunk driving *

CBI_2 · 12-19-2008, 02:43 PM

Very funny!

md4958 · 12-19-2008, 02:47 PM

* I no way condone drunk driving *[/quote]

funny chit my friend, but whats with the disclaimer??

dunng · 12-19-2008, 03:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by md4958

* I no way condone drunk driving *

funny chit my friend, but whats with the disclaimer??

Covering my

GKitty · 12-19-2008, 03:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by md4958

* I no way condone drunk driving *

funny chit my friend, but whats with the disclaimer??

[/quote]

Don't want to encourage the younguns to engage in dangerous behavior.

Anyone else call New Year's Eve "amatuer night"?

G G · 12-21-2008, 04:30 PM

Good one, and you can't be too careful these days.

Chris. · 12-21-2008, 05:08 PM

pretty funny

01-01-2009, 12:52 PM

I'm going to try this...little late I know...

karmaz00 · 01-01-2009, 02:19 PM

lol good one

heavyd · 01-01-2009, 02:25 PM

Hopefully the cop ran him for warrants. Chances are good that a mope like this has at least one

Starscream · 01-02-2009, 09:28 AM

Nicely played.

01-10-2009, 02:28 AM

too funny

12-19-2008, 05:34 AM	#1
dunng MassHole Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Greg Location: MassHole Posts: 4,719 Trading: (59)	Drunk Driver Recently a routine police patrol parked outside a bar in Orange Beach, Alabama, noticed a man leaving the bar so apparently intoxicated that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing. After what seemed an eternity in which he tried his keys on five different vehicles, the man managed to find his car and fall into it. He sat there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off. Finally he started the car, switched the wipers on and off--it was a fine, dry summer night, flicked the blinkers on and off a couple of times, honked the horn and then switched on the lights. He moved the vehicle forward a few inches, reversed a little and then remained still for a few more minutes as some more of the other patrons' vehicles left. At last, when his was the only car left in the parking lot, he pulled out and drove slowly down the road. The police officer, having waited patiently all this time, now started up his patrol car, put on the flashing lights, promptly pulled the man over and administered a breathalyzer test. To his amazement, the breathalyzer indicated no evidence that the man had consumed any alcohol at all! Dumbfounded, the officer said, I'll have to ask you to accompany me to the police station. This breathalyzer equipment must be broken.' 'I doubt it,' said the truly proud Redneck. 'Tonight I'm the Designated decoy. * I no way condone drunk driving * __________________ MassHole Banter

12-19-2008, 02:43 PM	#2
CBI_2 Have My Own Room Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Paul Location: In my skin. Posts: 2,066 Trading: (0)	Re: Drunk Driver Very funny! __________________ "The welfare of humanity is always the alibi of tyrants." Albert Camus Cool Cigar Themed Stuff

12-19-2008, 02:47 PM	#3
md4958 Captain Cannoli Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Moe Location: Suffield, CT Posts: 5,712 Trading: (62)	Re: Drunk Driver * I no way condone drunk driving *[/quote] funny chit my friend, but whats with the disclaimer?? __________________ "One fart can foul the air for everyone" - Esteemed philosopher "If avoiding the nasty $hit is being a snob, them I am guilty as charged."- Same esteemed philosopher.

12-21-2008, 04:30 PM	#6
G G BR549 Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Greg Location: Taylor, FL. Posts: 12,701 Trading: (10)	Re: Drunk Driver Good one, and you can't be too careful these days.

12-21-2008, 05:08 PM	#7
Chris. PSHC! Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Greenville, SC Posts: 1,842 Trading: (25)	Re: Drunk Driver pretty funny __________________

01-01-2009, 12:52 PM	#8
AdamC Guest Posts: n/a	Re: Drunk Driver I'm going to try this...little late I know...

01-01-2009, 02:19 PM	#9
karmaz00 Habanos Join Date: Dec 2008 First Name: Jason Location: victoria Posts: 1,855 Trading: (1)	Re: Drunk Driver lol good one

01-01-2009, 02:25 PM	#10
heavyd Adjusting to the Life Join Date: Nov 2008 First Name: Dave Location: La Mesa CA Posts: 316 Trading: (22)	Re: Drunk Driver Hopefully the cop ran him for warrants. Chances are good that a mope like this has at least one

01-02-2009, 09:28 AM	#11
Starscream Knowhutimean, Vern? Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Andy Location: In a little town somewhere in the USA Posts: 10,237 Trading: (4)	Re: Drunk Driver Nicely played. __________________ Insert quote here.

01-10-2009, 02:28 AM	#12
Metalnoise777 Guest Posts: n/a	Re: Drunk Driver too funny