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Old 11-29-2008, 10:48 PM   #1
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Default The tatoo

A woman goes into a tattoo parlour and tells the tattoo artist that she wants a tattoo of a turkey on her right thigh just below her bikini line. She also wants him to put "Happy Thanksgiving" under the turkey.

So the guy does it and it comes out looking really good. The woman then instructs him to put a Santa tattoo with "Merry Christmas" up on her left thigh.

So the guy does it and it comes out looking good, too. As the woman is getting dressed to leave, the tattoo artist asks, "If you don't mind, could you tell me why you had me put such unusual tattoos on your thighs?"

She says "I'm sick and tired of my husband complaining all the time that there's nothing good to eat between Thanksgiving and Christmas!"
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Old 11-29-2008, 11:20 PM   #2
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Default Re: The tatoo

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Old 11-30-2008, 06:49 AM   #3
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Default Re: The tatoo

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mugen910 View Post
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Old 11-30-2008, 12:02 PM   #4
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Default Re: The tatoo

:

That's one of the best ones I have heard in quite a while!
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Old 11-30-2008, 03:45 PM   #5
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Default Re: The tatoo

Good one.
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Old 11-30-2008, 04:21 PM   #6
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Old 11-30-2008, 04:32 PM   #7
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Default Re: The tatoo

I'm showing this to my wife as we speak. I'm always hungry, lol
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Old 12-01-2008, 08:27 PM   #8
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Default Re: The tatoo

Quote:
Originally Posted by sonic_mike View Post
I don't know if I will be able to sleep tonight now...thanks!
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Old 12-01-2008, 11:10 PM   #9
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Default Re: The tatoo

Rofl!

BTW: That pic scares me.....
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Old 12-02-2008, 08:27 PM   #10
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Default Re: The tatoo

That is great!
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Old 12-02-2008, 10:16 PM   #11
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Default Re: The tatoo

Quote:
Originally Posted by sonic_mike View Post
That's gotta be one of the creepiest pics I've ever seen.
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Old 12-02-2008, 10:42 PM   #12
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Default Re: The tatoo

Quote:
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That's gotta be one of the creepiest pics I've ever seen.
that's how the ex looked like after we broke up
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Old 12-04-2008, 11:21 PM   #13
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Default Re: The tatoo

Quote:
Originally Posted by LordOfWu View Post
I don't know if I will be able to sleep tonight now...thanks!
Very Scary.
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Old 02-08-2009, 05:01 AM   #14
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Default Re: The tatoo

Haha great joke!

Scary picture...
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Old 02-08-2009, 05:17 AM   #15
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Default Re: The tatoo

Nice.
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