Need a newb that writes reviews...

Sounds like fun. I'll be your huckleberry.
However, I'm not sure if I fit the criteria for number of posts; and I haven't posted any reviews here. Considering how unqualified I am given your conditions, my lack of basic English comprehension, my extremely unstable work schedule, inability to distinguish flavors in cigars, improper lighting/smoking technique, and general rude demeanor how could I not be qualified.