New Pipe Smoker With A Question? Ask an Old Fart

[Mister Moo]

Originally Posted by alley00p

...While searching, I came upon this device: "PIPE CLEANING RETORT - Item #270434301489". Has anyone ever used something like this to clean pipes, especially estate pipes that are especially dirty?

A retort will clean out a pipe faster (a whole lot faster) than a conventional bowl treatment with cotton ball (or coarse kosher salt) and Everclear.

If you're a pro and need to regularly clean pipes and/or can't wait 12-hours for a salt/booze treatment a retort does the trick. I think salt (or cotton ball) and alcohol does as well, just slower. If I had to sanitize pipes often I use a retort; for infrequent (civilian) needs, a soak is less bother.

[alley00p]

Originally Posted by Mister Moo

A retort will clean out a pipe faster (a whole lot faster) than a conventional bowl treatment with cotton ball (or coarse kosher salt) and Everclear.

If you're a pro and need to regularly clean pipes and/or can't wait 12-hours for a salt/booze treatment a retort does the trick. I think salt (or cotton ball) and alcohol does as well, just slower. If I had to sanitize pipes often I use a retort; for infrequent (civilian) needs, a soak is less bother.

Thanks, Dan! I know I read the kosher salt and everclear method here somewhere; do you have the link available without having to go through 9 pages of posts (if it's in this thread...)?

I'm hoping that my "new" pipes will be here next week, and I'll be able to join the ranks of CA pipesters!

[Mister Moo]

Originally Posted by alley00p

Thanks, Dan! I know I read the kosher salt and everclear method here somewhere; do you have the link available without having to go through 9 pages of posts (if it's in this thread...)?

I'm hoping that my "new" pipes will be here next week, and I'll be able to join the ranks of CA pipesters!

What C'Cut said about a retort - use carefully and consider it has a learning curve.

This site gives a good look at a professional approach with some helpful photos.

I was a gifted retort (home made from test tubes and surgical tubing) but my sorriest used pipe purchases - I mean ultra-grungies - have so far ended up clean and sweet with kosher (non-iodized) salt and 190-proof Everclear treatments. I suspect stories about cracked bowls and salt involved treatments using higher water content fluids (like 80-proof booze or maybe 70* rubbing alcohol) and extended soaking but I dunno, really. All I know is my method has been good for years and dozens of pipes. The booze and cotton ball guys never report a problem so who knows. I think that Everclear-190 and a wicking pipe cleaner pulls crud out of the pipe and then evaporates so fast that the briar won't saturate with residual water and, thus, has no opportunity to swell and crack.

My pipes get stinky enough for a cleaning with alcohol about once or twice a year. The nose tells all. After reaming, if needed, I use a method like this:

1. stick a loose-fit fluffy thru the stem and down into the bowl;
2. nearly top the bowl with kosher coarse salt (or cotton) - don't top it off or you might not see rising alcohol until it's too late and overflows;
3. secure the pipe at an angle, stem end slightly higher than the rim of the bowl, such that it won't move or tip;
4. carefully eye-dropper Everclear into the bowl quitting before an overflow;
5. come back in an hour and see brown grunge wicking up the fluffy from the stem; carefully remove the fluffy and replace with a clean one; refill the bowl with Everclear as needed.
6. Repeat until pipe cleaners are coming out clean(ish).
7. Assuming the salt (cotton) goes pretty brown allow the bowl to dry out (a few hours or overnight) dump the salt (cotton) and repeat the process. Take care the bowl is dry when removing the salt (cotton) so no alky dribbles on the pipe finish.
8. Finish the stem and shank with alky-dipped bristle cleaners.

Voila.

For my once a year deal, this usually takes one load of salt, several pipe cleaners and a couple of booze toppings while reading, surfing or watching TV over a couple of hours. For a screwed estate pipe that was globbed with aromatic I-don't-know-what it might take several replacements of salt (cotton) in the bowl and 20-30 pipe cleaners. For the totally screwed pipe (or for a pro who doesn't have hours to monitor and sanitize a pipe) I can see why a retort is a time-saving tool. I'm not sure one is worth the effort for just-folks like me who thoroughly cleans a pipe or two mon,th while slouching around the den.

Spit and a paper towel (or soft toothbrush) cleans rims.

A few hours of bleach soaking cleans the most oxydized vulcanite (assuming there are not logos on the stem that bleach will ruin);
some swear by Magic Eraser to clean vulcanite - it never works for me;
wet sanding with Micro Mesh polishing paper is the bees knees (grit 3500 to 12000) to clean vulcanite for me;
rubbing gritty toothpaste (Arm & Hammer) with an electric toothbrush (not the one you stick in your mouth that evening ) or damp wet paper towels cleans less nasty stems and polishes very well;
a final wipe with olive oil and things look spectacular.

I am not a carnuba waxer but, if you have a low speed flannel wheel, it'll lay on a shiney hard finish. Beware standard buffers - they can melt stems and remove pipe nomenclature in a blink.

[alley00p]

I have a question for you experienced pipe smokers:

How much does humidity affect pipes that are being stored in a rack?

My "Mini-ManCave" is located on my screened-in back porch. Humidity varies every day, and I wondered if there was a chance that my pipes could be damaged while resting in a rack on the shelf out there, especially in the warmer months. I plan on taking them inside when the weather gets cold.

Any comments?

[Mister Moo]

Originally Posted by alley00p

I have a question for you experienced pipe smokers:

How much does humidity affect pipes that are being stored in a rack?

My "Mini-ManCave" is located on my screened-in back porch. Humidity varies every day, and I wondered if there was a chance that my pipes could be damaged while resting in a rack on the shelf out there, especially in the warmer months. I plan on taking them inside when the weather gets cold.

Any comments?

Since nobody who knows anything has answered yet I'll kick this off with a non-expert opinion.

Briar is remarkably resiliant and can handle extremes in temperature and moisture. While your pipestems might get snugger or looser as humidity varies I can't imagine up-north temp and humidity will hurt the pipes. I've bought some great "estate" pipes that were probably in someones garage for 30-years - who asks? Exposure to UV/sunlight isn't a good thing for finished wood or vulcanite; the possibility of mold exists if the pipes stay too damp for too long; and swings in humidity and temp don't help the fine tolerances that make up a good pipe.

I sometimes leave a pipe or two on the back porch for a day or two and some sit in the car for days. No problems. But I'd not leave my pipe rack and pipes on the porch. I like them out of direct (or even indirect) sunlight, in a dry/steady environment and away from the weird things that happen on my back porch.

Are your pipes stinking up someone elses living space? I can relate. But they still ain't going on the porch.