The Great White Hunter?

[taltos]

Originally Posted by 14holestogie

So, I live on the 14th hole of my local golf club which has a large water hazard bordering 2 holes. While a great place to collect balls, in the last year or so, the banks have begun caving in many different places. Muskrats are the cause, and I am (or thought I was) the solution. The first couple of times I saw them swimming out there, I took the only weapon I had which was a pellet gun. They are some tough skinned bastages and all they'd do was give me a WTF look after plunking them. So I wised up and borrowed the BIL .22. Managed to get a couple of the critters last year while they were cavorting on the ice just before it all melted. Problem solved for all of last year.

This year, I've seen another (and the guy who sets the tees in the morning says he's seen two). I've gotten one shot off at one of them from about 80 yards when he presented me with the tiny target of himself swimming and I haven't seen them since (except about an hour after the first shot after I'd replaced the gun with a ball retriever, at which time I'm sure the bastage just smirked at me). Alright, I'll be persistant and get the bastages sometime later this year (I hope).

So this morning, I noticed a couple holes in the lawn heading under the deck which I recognize as ground squirrel burrows (kind of a cross between a small rat, squirrel, mole, chipmunk). I've had success with them in the past with mouse and rat traps, so I set up a rat trap with some thistle seed. Check the traps and an hour later the seed is gone and the trap is not sprung. I assume the critter is either too small to trip the rat trap and just licked the damn seed off. I wised up and placed some peanut butter and thistle seed to the rat trap, and being the smart guy I am, also set a much smaller mouse trap with the same concoction. Bastages can't outsmart an intelligent guy like me.

Not an hour later, I check the rat trap and nothing, still set and waiting. I decide to scope out the mouse trap, and the sum***** is gone. I know it won't fit down the burrow hole, but I can't locate the damn thing anywhere.

So I've now got some muskrats that have no respect for my hunting abilities and one p.o.-ed ground squirrel I am sure is planning his vengeance.

I am so screwed.

Reruns of Caddy Shack are playing in my mind.

[14holestogie]

Originally Posted by taltos

Reruns of Caddy Shack are playing in my mind.

It's playing live in my backyard!

This cracked me up.

[TripleF]

[Skywalker]

Originally Posted by taltos

Reruns of Caddy Shack are playing in my mind.

[Steve]

First thing that crossed my mind!

Originally Posted by Skywalker

[rizzle]

Originally Posted by Skywalker

License to kill gophers by the government of the United Nations. Man, free to kill gophers at will. To kill, you must know your enemy, and in this case my enemy is a varmint. And a varmint will never quit - ever. They're like the Viet Cong - Varmint Cong. So you have to fall back on superior intelligence and superior firepower. And that's all she wrote.

[lightning9191]

Originally Posted by taltos

Reruns of Caddy Shack are playing in my mind.

That's exactly what I was thinking.