The Dark Side of Women (classic)

SNKBYT · 06-21-2010, 01:51 PM

A woman was in town on a shopping trip. She began her day by finding the most perfect shoes in the first shop and a beautiful dress on sale slashed by 75 percent in the second. In the third, everything had just been reduced by 50 percent when her mobile phone rang.

It was a female doctor notifying her that her husband had just been in a terrible car accident and was in critical condition in the ICU.

The woman told the doctor to inform her husband where she was and that she'd be there as soon as possible. As she hung up she realized she was leaving what was shaping up to be her best day ever in the boutiques.

She decided to get in a couple more shops before heading to the hospital. She ended up shopping the rest of the morning, finishing her trip with a cup of coffee and a beautiful chocolate cake slice, compliments of the last shop. She was jubilant.

Then she remembered her husband. Feeling guilty, she dashes to the hospital.

She saw the woman doctor in the corridor and asked about her husband's condition. The doctor glared at her and shouted, "You went ahead and finished your shopping trip, didn't you!? I hope you're proud of yourself! While you were out for the past four hours enjoying yourself in town, your husband has been languishing in pain in the Intensive Care Unit! It's just as well you went ahead and finished, because it will more than likely be the last shopping trip you'll ever take! For the rest of his life he will require round-the-clock care. And he will now be your career!"

The woman, overcome with guilt, broke down and sobbed.

The woman doctor chuckled and said, "I'm just messing with you. He's dead. Show me what you bought."

Blindjimme · 06-21-2010, 02:12 PM

Ha! I love it!

Tenor CS · 06-21-2010, 02:15 PM

I've heard this with the genders switched, and the guy is golfing, not shopping.

The punchline is, "I'm kidding, she's dead, what did you shoot?"

tomc3084 · 06-21-2010, 02:17 PM

Awesome! That is classic!

icehog3 · 06-21-2010, 02:23 PM

Dang!

KenyanSandBoa · 06-21-2010, 02:25 PM

Lear31MX · 06-21-2010, 02:52 PM

very good one

bvilchez · 06-21-2010, 02:56 PM

that was good...I almost spit our my Dr. Pepper
Posted via Mobile Device

kelmac07 · 06-21-2010, 04:59 PM

That's just wrong!!

Dave128 · 06-22-2010, 12:11 PM

Neato!!

G G · 06-22-2010, 12:37 PM

colinb913 · 06-22-2010, 01:09 PM

LMAO ive heard the gender switch as well.
Posted via Mobile Device

kaisersozei · 06-23-2010, 07:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kelmac07

That's just wrong!!

I emailed this to my wife yesterday with that exact Subject line ("That's just wrong!") She thought it was a hysterical joke and proceeded to tell it at dinner last night. My daughter laughed & laughed, my stepson said, "That's just wrong!"

06-23-2010, 09:29 AM

This is great. A good reminder for all the guys to stay away from chicks like that!

Skywalker · 06-24-2010, 09:20 AM

My wife would head to dinner right after that and go on a bigger spending spree the next day... insurance money!

Starscream · 06-24-2010, 09:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Skywalker

My wife would head to dinner right after that and go on a bigger spending spree the next day... insurance money!

Insurance sucks when your dead!

kaisersozei · 06-24-2010, 11:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by andysutherland

Insurance sucks when your dead!

And that's when most wives do, too

(ba dum *swish*)

Skywalker · 06-24-2010, 04:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kaisersozei

And that's when most wives do, too

(ba dum *swish*)

Starscream · 06-24-2010, 08:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kaisersozei

And that's when most wives do, too

(ba dum *swish*)

They don't while you're alive, but I guess they will with the next husband...

Sorry ladies who are on this site.

06-21-2010, 01:51 PM	#1
SNKBYT PATRIOT and VETERAN Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Alex Location: TOMBSTONE, AZ Posts: 3,282 Trading: (30)	The Dark Side of Women (classic) A woman was in town on a shopping trip. She began her day by finding the most perfect shoes in the first shop and a beautiful dress on sale slashed by 75 percent in the second. In the third, everything had just been reduced by 50 percent when her mobile phone rang. It was a female doctor notifying her that her husband had just been in a terrible car accident and was in critical condition in the ICU. The woman told the doctor to inform her husband where she was and that she'd be there as soon as possible. As she hung up she realized she was leaving what was shaping up to be her best day ever in the boutiques. She decided to get in a couple more shops before heading to the hospital. She ended up shopping the rest of the morning, finishing her trip with a cup of coffee and a beautiful chocolate cake slice, compliments of the last shop. She was jubilant. Then she remembered her husband. Feeling guilty, she dashes to the hospital. She saw the woman doctor in the corridor and asked about her husband's condition. The doctor glared at her and shouted, "You went ahead and finished your shopping trip, didn't you!? I hope you're proud of yourself! While you were out for the past four hours enjoying yourself in town, your husband has been languishing in pain in the Intensive Care Unit! It's just as well you went ahead and finished, because it will more than likely be the last shopping trip you'll ever take! For the rest of his life he will require round-the-clock care. And he will now be your career!" The woman, overcome with guilt, broke down and sobbed. The woman doctor chuckled and said, "I'm just messing with you. He's dead. Show me what you bought." __________________ "IF YOU WANT TO TAKE MY FREEDOM, MAKE DAMN SURE THAT YOU'RE AS PASSSIONATE ABOUT TAKING IT AS I AM ABOUT KEEPING IT"

06-21-2010, 02:12 PM	#2
Blindjimme Judgement Impaired Join Date: Apr 2009 First Name: JB Location: North OC, CA Posts: 790 Trading: (14)	Re: The Dark Side of Women (classic) Ha! I love it!

06-21-2010, 02:15 PM	#3
Tenor CS Feeling Better! Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Christian Location: Davenport, FL (near Orlando) Posts: 717 Trading: (2)	Re: The Dark Side of Women (classic) I've heard this with the genders switched, and the guy is golfing, not shopping. The punchline is, "I'm kidding, she's dead, what did you shoot?" __________________ When the world itself seems lunatic, who knows where madness lies?

06-21-2010, 02:17 PM	#4
tomc3084 Feeling at Home Join Date: Dec 2009 First Name: Tom Location: Baden, PA Posts: 710 Trading: (26)	Re: The Dark Side of Women (classic) Awesome! That is classic! __________________ [SIGPIC]

06-21-2010, 02:23 PM	#5
icehog3 Admiral Douchebag Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Tom Location: Clermont, Kentucky Posts: 70,553 Trading: (60)	Re: The Dark Side of Women (classic) Dang! __________________ Thanks Dave, Julian, James, Kelly, Peter, Gerry, Dave, Mo, Frank, Týr and Mr. Mark!

06-21-2010, 02:25 PM	#6
KenyanSandBoa The Nightman Cometh... Join Date: Jan 2010 First Name: Jim Location: Massholia Posts: 1,463 Trading: (74)	Re: The Dark Side of Women (classic) __________________ I hope you brought a change of clothes because your eyes are about to piss tears.

06-21-2010, 02:52 PM	#7
Lear31MX Herf Crew of 2 Join Date: May 2010 First Name: Anthony Location: Pacific Northwest L.C.D.H. Posts: 451 Trading: (8)	Re: The Dark Side of Women (classic) very good one __________________ Being still and doing nothing are two very different things.

06-21-2010, 02:56 PM	#8
bvilchez En búsqueda..... Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Bolivar aka Jay Location: Back in SoCal Posts: 3,202 Trading: (76)	Re: The Dark Side of Women (classic) that was good...I almost spit our my Dr. Pepper Posted via Mobile Device

06-21-2010, 04:59 PM	#9
kelmac07 Resident Maduro Whore!! Join Date: Apr 2009 First Name: Mac Location: Newport News, VA Posts: 27,322 Trading: (218)	Re: The Dark Side of Women (classic) That's just wrong!! __________________ Dom in the MLB thread "I could probably get you to wear a Yankee hat for a Maduro!"

06-22-2010, 12:11 PM	#10
Dave128 Sexy Dave Join Date: Feb 2009 First Name: Dave Location: Voorheesville, NY Posts: 3,917 Trading: (4)	Re: The Dark Side of Women (classic) Neato!! __________________ "Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." - Benjamin Franklin I "heart" Boobies and Beer!

06-22-2010, 12:37 PM	#11
G G BR549 Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Greg Location: Taylor, FL. Posts: 12,701 Trading: (10)	Re: The Dark Side of Women (classic)

06-22-2010, 01:09 PM	#12
colinb913 Workin' at a Cigar Shop Join Date: Feb 2010 First Name: Colin Location: Indiana Posts: 540 Trading: (1)	Re: The Dark Side of Women (classic) LMAO ive heard the gender switch as well. Posted via Mobile Device

06-23-2010, 09:29 AM	#14
KingJaffeJoffer Guest Posts: n/a	Re: The Dark Side of Women (classic) This is great. A good reminder for all the guys to stay away from chicks like that!

06-24-2010, 09:20 AM	#15
Skywalker BABOTL Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Dice Location: Galaxy Far Far Away Posts: 10,168 Trading: (18)	Re: The Dark Side of Women (classic) My wife would head to dinner right after that and go on a bigger spending spree the next day... insurance money! __________________ Smoke what you like!!!