The Newlywed

CBI_2 · 03-06-2009, 04:47 PM

A couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although very much in love, couldn’t wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies.

So, he said to his new wife, “Honey, I’ll be right back.” Where are you going, Coochy Coo?” asked the wife.

“I’m going to the bar, Pretty Face. I’m going to have a beer.” The wife said, “You want a beer, my love?” She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.

The husband didn’t know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, “Yes, Lollipop…but at the bar…you know…they have frozen glasses… ”

He didn’t get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying, “You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?” She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.

The husband, looking a bit pale, said, “Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the bar they have those hors d’oeuvres that are really delicious…I won’t be long. I’ll be right back. I promise. OK?”

“You want hors d’oeuvres, Poochie ?” She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d’oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, and pork strips.

“But my sweet honey…at the bar….you know there’s swearing, dirty words and all that…”

“You want dirty words, Cutie Pie?…”LISTEN UP D***HEAD! SIT DOWN, SHUT THE H*LL UP, DRINK YOUR DAMN BEER IN YOUR DAMN FROZEN MUG, AND EAT YOUR F****IN’ HORS D’OEUVRES. BECAUSE YOUR MARRIED ASS ISN’T GOING TO A DAM BAR! THAT CHIT IS OVER… GOT IT, A$$HOLE?”

…and they lived happily ever after.

WildBlueSooner · 03-06-2009, 05:00 PM

Nice!

WildBlueSooner · 03-06-2009, 05:01 PM

Was the guy's name Paul?

CBI_2 · 03-06-2009, 05:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WildBlueSooner

Was the guy's name Paul?

NOOOOO!

G G · 03-06-2009, 05:06 PM

There you go, funny one Paul.

CBI_2 · 03-06-2009, 05:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ggainey

There you go, funny one Paul.

Thank you sir.

03-07-2009, 06:40 PM

it was Paul,wasn't it?

tunes · 03-07-2009, 06:42 PM

How true it is...

theonlybear4CORT · 03-07-2009, 06:59 PM

LOL

r

CBI_2 · 03-07-2009, 10:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RottenZombie

it was Paul,wasn't it?

for you too.

Genetic Defect · 03-07-2009, 10:25 PM

repost

CBI_2 · 03-07-2009, 11:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Big Vito

repost

Oooops!

michael88n · 03-07-2009, 11:22 PM

*whew!* Sure glad that ain't me!

Funny stuff.

Genetic Defect · 03-07-2009, 11:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CBI_2

Oooops!

don't you remember reading it last year

I was joking Paula

CBI_2 · 03-08-2009, 09:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Big Vito

don't you remember reading it last year I was joking Paula

and another

for you also.

Damn! I need

after all this.

Genetic Defect · 03-08-2009, 12:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CBI_2

and another

for you also.

sumbody got the panties in a bunch?

CBI_2 · 03-08-2009, 09:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Big Vito

sumbody got the panties in a bunch?

More like tighty-whities.

Genetic Defect · 03-08-2009, 09:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CBI_2

More like tighty-whities.

I heard you were into racing (cars)

03-08-2009, 09:35 PM

Great as always Paul!

CBI_2 · 03-08-2009, 10:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Big Vito

I heard you were into racing (cars)

Quote:

Originally Posted by jamesb3

Great as always Paul!

Thanks!

03-06-2009, 04:47 PM	#1
CBI_2 Have My Own Room Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Paul Location: In my skin. Posts: 2,066 Trading: (0)	The Newlywed A couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although very much in love, couldn’t wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies. So, he said to his new wife, “Honey, I’ll be right back.” Where are you going, Coochy Coo?” asked the wife. “I’m going to the bar, Pretty Face. I’m going to have a beer.” The wife said, “You want a beer, my love?” She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc. The husband didn’t know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, “Yes, Lollipop…but at the bar…you know…they have frozen glasses… ” He didn’t get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying, “You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?” She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it. The husband, looking a bit pale, said, “Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the bar they have those hors d’oeuvres that are really delicious…I won’t be long. I’ll be right back. I promise. OK?” “You want hors d’oeuvres, Poochie ?” She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d’oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, and pork strips. “But my sweet honey…at the bar….you know there’s swearing, dirty words and all that…” “You want dirty words, Cutie Pie?…”LISTEN UP D**HEAD! SIT DOWN, SHUT THE HLL UP, DRINK YOUR DAMN BEER IN YOUR DAMN FROZEN MUG, AND EAT YOUR F****IN’ HORS D’OEUVRES. BECAUSE YOUR MARRIED ASS ISN’T GOING TO A DAM BAR! THAT CHIT IS OVER… GOT IT, A$$HOLE?” …and they lived happily ever after. __________________ "The welfare of humanity is always the alibi of tyrants." Albert Camus Cool Cigar Themed Stuff

03-06-2009, 05:00 PM	#2
WildBlueSooner I'm nuts for the place Join Date: Feb 2009 First Name: James Location: Lexington, KY Posts: 3,322 Trading: (19)	Re: The Newlywed Nice!

03-06-2009, 05:01 PM	#3
WildBlueSooner I'm nuts for the place Join Date: Feb 2009 First Name: James Location: Lexington, KY Posts: 3,322 Trading: (19)	Re: The Newlywed Was the guy's name Paul?

03-06-2009, 05:06 PM	#5
G G BR549 Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Greg Location: Taylor, FL. Posts: 12,701 Trading: (10)	Re: The Newlywed There you go, funny one Paul.

03-07-2009, 06:40 PM	#7
RottenZombie Guest Posts: n/a	Re: The Newlywed it was Paul,wasn't it?

03-07-2009, 06:42 PM	#8
tunes Still Watching My Back Join Date: Feb 2009 First Name: Bruce Location: East of the Mississippi Posts: 220 Trading: (3)	Re: The Newlywed How true it is... __________________ What if the Hokey Pokey really is what it's all about?

03-07-2009, 06:59 PM	#9
theonlybear4CORT RIP Nick Montano Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Mike Location: Santa Rosa Posts: 2,040 Trading: (14)	Re: The Newlywed LOL r

03-07-2009, 10:25 PM	#11
Genetic Defect difetosso Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Perry Location: An elevator Posts: 5,202 Trading: (5)	Re: The Newlywed repost __________________ I'm an outcast riding into town alone I got wanderlust branded deeper than the bone

03-07-2009, 11:22 PM	#13
michael88n Finger Sniffer Join Date: Feb 2009 First Name: Michael Location: PNW Posts: 166 Trading: (3)	Re: The Newlywed whew! Sure glad that ain't me! Funny stuff.

03-08-2009, 09:35 PM	#19
jamesb3 Guest Posts: n/a	Re: The Newlywed Great as always Paul!