Cat advice

MajorCaptSilly · 12-09-2008, 07:29 PM

I have 2 cats: Ginger & Cupcake. They are about 8 years old and very healthy inside cats. Lately they have been ignoring me. The only time they give me any attention is when they're hungry. I think they are also mocking me when I'm not looking. Do you think they're mad at me?

MCS

AD720 · 12-09-2008, 07:31 PM

Try playing hard to get.

BTW, they are definitely mocking you.

Emjaysmash · 12-09-2008, 07:33 PM

Try starving them. Worked with my kids...

...wait. I dont have kids. Never mind, then.

lightning9191 · 12-09-2008, 07:35 PM

Do you think they might be conspiring? I was ambushed once by my cats, but after fighting my way out of the brawl I established myself as the alpha male.

VirtualSmitty · 12-09-2008, 07:35 PM

They are planning on assassinating you. Sorry MCS, you obviously missed the quiz.

massphatness · 12-09-2008, 07:38 PM

Cats are pussies.

csbrewfisher · 12-09-2008, 07:41 PM

Maybe they need to go for a long hike on a short trail...

12-09-2008, 07:45 PM

You must analyze - which do you have?

12-09-2008, 07:46 PM

My cats vary their attention giving and seeking. Sometimes, very needy, sometimes very aloof. But no matter how they are acting, cats are always plotting our demise.

AD720 · 12-09-2008, 07:48 PM

EXCERPTS FROM A CAT'S DIARY

DAY 752 - My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant.

DAY 761 - Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded, must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair ... must try this on their bed.

DAY 765 - Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was...Hmmm. Not working according to plan.

DAY 768 - I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good reason I was chosen for the water torture. This time however it included a burning foamy chemical called "shampoo." What sick minds could invent such a liquid. My only consolation is the piece of thumb still stuck between my teeth.

DAY 771 - There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the foul odor of the glass tubes they call "beer". More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

DAY 774 - I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time...

12-09-2008, 07:49 PM

you're confused.

Dogs have MASTERS.

Cats have STAFF.

hotreds · 12-09-2008, 07:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tobii3

you're confused.

Dogs have MASTERS.

Cats have STAFF.

They are behaving like CATS!

MajorCaptSilly · 12-09-2008, 08:06 PM

I just had a talk with Ginger and she said that Cupcake is making her ignore me. Seems I walked where Cupcake wanted to walk a couple weeks ago and he can't let it go. I'm gonna get him some catnip.

MCS

12-09-2008, 08:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MajorCaptSilly

I just had a talk with Ginger and she said that Cupcake is making her ignore me. Seems I walked where Cupcake wanted to walk a couple weeks ago and he can't let it go. I'm gonna get him some catnip.

MCS

Bribes usually work.

VirtualSmitty · 12-09-2008, 08:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MajorCaptSilly

I just had a talk with Ginger and she said that Cupcake is making her ignore me. Seems I walked where Cupcake wanted to walk a couple weeks ago and he can't let it go. I'm gonna get him some catnip.

MCS

What kind of example are you setting? Trying to buy their love with drugs?

massphatness · 12-09-2008, 08:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by VirtualSmitty

What kind of example are you setting? Trying to buy their love with drugs?

I would love you for drugs, MCS.

VirtualSmitty · 12-09-2008, 08:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by massphatness

I would love you for drugs, MCS.

This will only end ugly.

MajorCaptSilly · 12-09-2008, 08:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by massphatness

I would love you for drugs, MCS.

Love me long time?

MCS

AAlmeter · 12-09-2008, 08:59 PM

They taste like chicken. A .22 is more than enough.

Bon Appetit.

DrDubzz · 12-09-2008, 09:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MajorCaptSilly

I just had a talk with Ginger and she said that Cupcake is making her ignore me. Seems I walked where Cupcake wanted to walk a couple weeks ago and he can't let it go. I'm gonna get him some catnip.

MCS

rub that catnip on your thighs, problem solved

12-09-2008, 07:29 PM	#1
MajorCaptSilly Sklee Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Scott Location: Mishawaka, IN Posts: 2,523 Trading: (30)	Cat advice I have 2 cats: Ginger & Cupcake. They are about 8 years old and very healthy inside cats. Lately they have been ignoring me. The only time they give me any attention is when they're hungry. I think they are also mocking me when I'm not looking. Do you think they're mad at me? MCS

12-09-2008, 07:31 PM	#2
AD720 I'm nuts for the place Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Andrew Location: The City of BOTL-erly Love Posts: 2,684 Trading: (73)	Re: Cat advice Try playing hard to get. BTW, they are definitely mocking you.

12-09-2008, 07:33 PM	#3
Emjaysmash The Hebrew Hammer Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: M.J. Location: Milwaukee, WI Posts: 7,025 Trading: (76)	Re: Cat advice Try starving them. Worked with my kids... ...wait. I dont have kids. Never mind, then. __________________

12-09-2008, 07:35 PM	#4
lightning9191 I think I'm normal... Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Kevin Posts: 1,007 Trading: (8)	Re: Cat advice Do you think they might be conspiring? I was ambushed once by my cats, but after fighting my way out of the brawl I established myself as the alpha male. __________________ I eat gummy bears by tearing them limb from limb and eating their heads last.

12-09-2008, 07:35 PM	#5
VirtualSmitty WiP!? Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Joe Location: The Evil Empire Posts: 2,084 Trading: (0)	Re: Cat advice They are planning on assassinating you. Sorry MCS, you obviously missed the quiz. __________________ We are all born ignorant, but one must work hard to remain stupid - Benjamin Franklin

12-09-2008, 07:38 PM	#6
massphatness Where's my buffaloooo ... Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Vin Location: MassHolia Posts: 12,688 Trading: (206)	Re: Cat advice Cats are pussies. __________________ *Help Support The Navy SEAL Foundation: HERE*

12-09-2008, 07:41 PM	#7
csbrewfisher Welcome to my nightmare Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Jerry Location: Colorado Springs Posts: 676 Trading: (10)	Re: Cat advice Maybe they need to go for a long hike on a short trail...

12-09-2008, 07:45 PM	#8
parafumar Guest Posts: n/a	Re: Cat advice You must analyze - which do you have?

12-09-2008, 07:46 PM	#9
kayaker Guest Posts: n/a	Re: Cat advice My cats vary their attention giving and seeking. Sometimes, very needy, sometimes very aloof. But no matter how they are acting, cats are always plotting our demise.

12-09-2008, 07:48 PM	#10
AD720 I'm nuts for the place Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Andrew Location: The City of BOTL-erly Love Posts: 2,684 Trading: (73)	Re: Cat advice EXCERPTS FROM A CAT'S DIARY DAY 752 - My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant. DAY 761 - Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded, must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair ... must try this on their bed. DAY 765 - Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was...Hmmm. Not working according to plan. DAY 768 - I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good reason I was chosen for the water torture. This time however it included a burning foamy chemical called "shampoo." What sick minds could invent such a liquid. My only consolation is the piece of thumb still stuck between my teeth. DAY 771 - There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the foul odor of the glass tubes they call "beer". More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage. DAY 774 - I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time...

12-09-2008, 07:49 PM	#11
tobii3 Guest Posts: n/a	Re: Cat advice you're confused. Dogs have MASTERS. Cats have STAFF.

12-09-2008, 08:06 PM	#13
MajorCaptSilly Sklee Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Scott Location: Mishawaka, IN Posts: 2,523 Trading: (30)	Re: Cat advice I just had a talk with Ginger and she said that Cupcake is making her ignore me. Seems I walked where Cupcake wanted to walk a couple weeks ago and he can't let it go. I'm gonna get him some catnip. MCS

12-09-2008, 08:59 PM	#19
AAlmeter F.U.B.O. Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Adam Location: Buffalo Posts: 288 Trading: (0)	Re: Cat advice They taste like chicken. A .22 is more than enough. Bon Appetit.