They just don't make brains like they use to - Page 2

Blueface · 05-28-2010, 08:49 AM

Reading all your stories shows we are all in a very similar boat.

I thought getting them to 18 was the hard part.
While tough indeed, it is after 18 to mid to late 20's that seems to suck as much, in a totally different way.

I am trying so hard to remember if I was the same way.
It just seems the word gratitude is non existent and one would think at that age, the person is no longer a child and should reason like an adult.

Tony,
In your case, you have a tough one in that the car is in your name and hence you need to keep the insurance on it.
Make sure you notify your carrier of the new garaging of the car so no issues down the line should she have a loss up there.

newcigarz · 05-28-2010, 08:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blueface

Tony,
In your case, you have a tough one in that the car is in your name and hence you need to keep the insurance on it.
Make sure you notify your carrier of the new garaging of the car so no issues down the line should she have a loss up there.

Thanks for the heads up.

05-28-2010, 10:26 AM

The title of this thread is misleading. The problem is that parents brains are made the same and that leads us into these situations with our kids. You have to have some hard boundaries with soft edges.
It's always been this way.

BlackDog · 05-28-2010, 10:28 AM

I've got a 21 year old daughter who can be a bit of a Drama Queen. You may be sick, but she is dying. You may have a bad day, but hers is the worst in the history of mankind. Makes me crazy sometimes.

We're in the process currently of "cutting" our financial relationship with her. Not in a bad way, but it's time for her to become independent. We've taught her how to be financially responsible, but it won't really hit home until she has to make real-life decisions. Her current decisions of "Do I go to a movie with my friends, or buy a new blouse?" aren't really moving the ball forward.

Good luck Carlos!

05-28-2010, 10:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BlackDog

I've got a 21 year old daughter who can be a bit of a Drama Queen. You may be sick, but she is dying. You may have a bad day, but hers is the worst in the history of mankind. Makes me crazy sometimes.

We're in the process currently of "cutting" our financial relationship with her. Not in a bad way, but it's time for her to become independent. We've taught her how to be financially responsible, but it won't really hit home until she has to make real-life decisions. Her current decisions of "Do I go to a movie with my friends, or buy a new blouse?" aren't really moving the ball forward.

Good luck Carlos!

lol

Have I got stories!
Gotta teach those birds to fly...

Blueface · 05-28-2010, 10:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BC-Axeman

The title of this thread is misleading. The problem is that parents brains are made the same and that leads us into these situations with our kids. You have to have some hard boundaries with soft edges.
It's always been this way.

Unfortunately, regardless of how hard you set those boundaries, they are always compromised.

In this case, I reacted due to what I saw when I grew up.
I recall my dad pawning his jewelry to get me much needed medical care when I was young.

I fell for the call from the wife and my mom that told me how terrible of a condition she was in.

Took her to the Dr. and watched her be miserable the whole way there.

Like my dad, having learned from him, nothing will ever stop me from making sure a family member gets necessary medical treatment.

The last thing I expected was a fun time at a ball game post all that.

However, I too learn. You an only cry wolf so many times and she has run out of them.

shilala · 05-28-2010, 10:48 AM

Carlos, just keep thinking "Grandchildren". Full circle tends to come full circle.

Talk to the kid, calmly. Explain what happened to you because of her "crisis".
It's not like she's going to understand, but she'll understand the next time she sticks her hand out and you explain you haven't finished paying off the ass pounding she gave you last time.
Plus you want to take Mom to the ball game, and it's your last $500 bucks.

Don Fernando · 05-28-2010, 10:53 AM

so Carlos, if I understand correctly she makes you pay the bills, and then spend her own money on fun stuff? Sounds to me that the new brain is smarter than the old one

Blueface · 05-28-2010, 11:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Don Fernando

so Carlos, if I understand correctly she makes you pay the bills, and then spend her own money on fun stuff? Sounds to me that the new brain is smarter than the old one

shilala · 05-28-2010, 01:09 PM

I think Don mighta got ya there, brother.

markem · 05-28-2010, 01:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blueface

The last thing I expected was a fun time at a ball game post all that.

Apparently, nothing heals like a little TLC from Dad.

BlackDog · 05-28-2010, 02:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by markem

Apparently, nothing heals like a little TLC from Dad.

Daddy kissed it and made the boo-boo all better.

markem · 05-28-2010, 03:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BlackDog

Daddy kissed it and made the boo-boo all better.

Hey Carlos, my butt hurts

Blueface · 05-28-2010, 03:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by markem

Hey Carlos, my butt hurts

Bastage!!!

She is now on the phone with my wife.
She has been in bed all day.
Has fever.
Feels terrible.

I guess she doesn't have tickets for tonight's game.

icehog3 · 05-28-2010, 04:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blueface

Bastage!!!

She is now on the phone with my wife.
She has been in bed all day.
Has fever.
Feels terrible.

I guess she doesn't have tickets for tonight's game.

Don't be so sure, she felt terrible yesterday too, Brother.

SmokeyJoe · 05-28-2010, 04:43 PM

Timely post, Carlos... going through some idiocy with my 21 year old son...

I keep saying that the boy is "eat up with stupid." My wife reminds me that is is a genetic disorder.

Hang in there - even with the money and the hassles, every once in a while they do something that melts your heart. Make her aware of your disappointment, and then you just move forward.

Here's to our kids learning life's lessons before it kills them - or us.

I need a cigar.

Blueface · 05-28-2010, 04:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SmokeyJoe

Timely post, Carlos... going through some idiocy with my 21 year old son...

I keep saying that the boy is "eat up with stupid." My wife reminds me that is is a genetic disorder.

Hang in there - even with the money and the hassles, every once in a while they do something that melts your heart. Make her aware of your disappointment, and then you just move forward.

Here's to our kids learning life's lessons before it kills them - or us.

I need a cigar.

Joe,
Just had a loaded mojito and a cigar.
Ready for another of each.

floydpink · 05-28-2010, 05:07 PM

They say all this kindness and understanding you show to your kids ends up coming back in the end.

I hope you live long enough to reap the fruits of your labor buddy.

05-28-2010, 05:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by floydpink

They say all this kindness and understanding you show to your kids ends up coming back in the end.

I hope you live long enough to reap the fruits of your labor buddy.

Every kid is different but some of that return kindness starts to come back when they have their own kids.
Here's to grandkids. *clink*

Partagaspete · 05-29-2010, 05:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blueface

While I am truly irked about the money part, it also bothers me that everyone went nuts and out of the way thinking she was in dire need of medical help and then off to a Marlins game she goes after that.

Amazing.

Carlos,

Maybe you should sit down with her and have a heart to heart...seriously all this stress could give you angina or maybe even a kidney stone

.

T

05-28-2010, 08:49 AM	#21
Blueface Gramps 4x's Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Horatio Seymore Hiny Location: Boca Raton - North of La Habana Posts: 8,774 Trading: (8)	Re: They just don't make brains like they use to Reading all your stories shows we are all in a very similar boat. I thought getting them to 18 was the hard part. While tough indeed, it is after 18 to mid to late 20's that seems to suck as much, in a totally different way. I am trying so hard to remember if I was the same way. It just seems the word gratitude is non existent and one would think at that age, the person is no longer a child and should reason like an adult. Tony, In your case, you have a tough one in that the car is in your name and hence you need to keep the insurance on it. Make sure you notify your carrier of the new garaging of the car so no issues down the line should she have a loss up there. __________________ Little known fact: I am a former member of the Village People - The Indian

05-28-2010, 10:26 AM	#23
BC-Axeman Guest Posts: n/a	Re: They just don't make brains like they use to The title of this thread is misleading. The problem is that parents brains are made the same and that leads us into these situations with our kids. You have to have some hard boundaries with soft edges. It's always been this way.

05-28-2010, 10:28 AM	#24
BlackDog Gonna make you groove... Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Warren Location: Minneapolis, MN Posts: 2,468 Trading: (19)	Re: They just don't make brains like they use to I've got a 21 year old daughter who can be a bit of a Drama Queen. You may be sick, but she is dying. You may have a bad day, but hers is the worst in the history of mankind. Makes me crazy sometimes. We're in the process currently of "cutting" our financial relationship with her. Not in a bad way, but it's time for her to become independent. We've taught her how to be financially responsible, but it won't really hit home until she has to make real-life decisions. Her current decisions of "Do I go to a movie with my friends, or buy a new blouse?" aren't really moving the ball forward. Good luck Carlos! __________________ "We live in the good of this."

05-28-2010, 10:48 AM	#27
shilala Dear Lord, Thank You. Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Scott Posts: 13,721 Trading: (252)	Re: They just don't make brains like they use to Carlos, just keep thinking "Grandchildren". Full circle tends to come full circle. Talk to the kid, calmly. Explain what happened to you because of her "crisis". It's not like she's going to understand, but she'll understand the next time she sticks her hand out and you explain you haven't finished paying off the ass pounding she gave you last time. Plus you want to take Mom to the ball game, and it's your last $500 bucks. __________________

05-28-2010, 10:53 AM	#28
Don Fernando Postwhore Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Ferdinand Location: Singapore Posts: 10,064 Trading: (29)	Re: They just don't make brains like they use to so Carlos, if I understand correctly she makes you pay the bills, and then spend her own money on fun stuff? Sounds to me that the new brain is smarter than the old one __________________ check out my reviews on my blog.

05-28-2010, 01:09 PM	#30
shilala Dear Lord, Thank You. Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Scott Posts: 13,721 Trading: (252)	Re: They just don't make brains like they use to I think Don mighta got ya there, brother. __________________

05-28-2010, 04:43 PM	#36
SmokeyJoe Chief Wannastogie Lounge Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Joe Location: Raleigh, NC Posts: 3,160 Trading: (28)	Re: They just don't make brains like they use to Timely post, Carlos... going through some idiocy with my 21 year old son... I keep saying that the boy is "eat up with stupid." My wife reminds me that is is a genetic disorder. Hang in there - even with the money and the hassles, every once in a while they do something that melts your heart. Make her aware of your disappointment, and then you just move forward. Here's to our kids learning life's lessons before it kills them - or us. I need a cigar. __________________ "I intend to smoke a good cigar to the glory of God..." ~ Charles H. Spurgeon, British Baptist preacher

05-28-2010, 05:07 PM	#38
floydpink crazy diamond Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Pete Location: Orlando Posts: 1,955 Trading: (17)	Re: They just don't make brains like they use to They say all this kindness and understanding you show to your kids ends up coming back in the end. I hope you live long enough to reap the fruits of your labor buddy. __________________ "If we weren't all crazy we would go insane"