The Great White Hunter?

14holestogie · 04-26-2009, 05:06 PM

So, I live on the 14th hole of my local golf club which has a large water hazard bordering 2 holes. While a great place to collect balls, in the last year or so, the banks have begun caving in many different places. Muskrats are the cause, and I am (or thought I was) the solution. The first couple of times I saw them swimming out there, I took the only weapon I had which was a pellet gun. They are some tough skinned bastages and all they'd do was give me a WTF look after plunking them. So I wised up and borrowed the BIL .22. Managed to get a couple of the critters last year while they were cavorting on the ice just before it all melted. Problem solved for all of last year.

This year, I've seen another (and the guy who sets the tees in the morning says he's seen two). I've gotten one shot off at one of them from about 80 yards when he presented me with the tiny target of himself swimming and I haven't seen them since (except about an hour after the first shot after I'd replaced the gun with a ball retriever, at which time I'm sure the bastage just smirked at me). Alright, I'll be persistant and get the bastages sometime later this year (I hope).

So this morning, I noticed a couple holes in the lawn heading under the deck which I recognize as ground squirrel burrows (kind of a cross between a small rat, squirrel, mole, chipmunk). I've had success with them in the past with mouse and rat traps, so I set up a rat trap with some thistle seed. Check the traps and an hour later the seed is gone and the trap is not sprung. I assume the critter is either too small to trip the rat trap and just licked the damn seed off. I wised up and placed some peanut butter and thistle seed to the rat trap, and being the smart guy I am, also set a much smaller mouse trap with the same concoction. Bastages can't outsmart an intelligent guy like me.

Not an hour later, I check the rat trap and nothing, still set and waiting. I decide to scope out the mouse trap, and the sum***** is gone. I know it won't fit down the burrow hole, but I can't locate the damn thing anywhere.

So I've now got some muskrats that have no respect for my hunting abilities and one p.o.-ed ground squirrel I am sure is planning his vengeance.

I am so screwed.

G G · 04-26-2009, 05:09 PM

Muskrats-groundsquirells 4

Tim 0

hahahahah

WildBlueSooner · 04-26-2009, 05:20 PM

That story is hilarious! I have faith that you will eventually get revenge!

taltos · 04-26-2009, 05:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 14holestogie

So, I live on the 14th hole of my local golf club which has a large water hazard bordering 2 holes. While a great place to collect balls, in the last year or so, the banks have begun caving in many different places. Muskrats are the cause, and I am (or thought I was) the solution. The first couple of times I saw them swimming out there, I took the only weapon I had which was a pellet gun. They are some tough skinned bastages and all they'd do was give me a WTF look after plunking them. So I wised up and borrowed the BIL .22. Managed to get a couple of the critters last year while they were cavorting on the ice just before it all melted. Problem solved for all of last year.

This year, I've seen another (and the guy who sets the tees in the morning says he's seen two). I've gotten one shot off at one of them from about 80 yards when he presented me with the tiny target of himself swimming and I haven't seen them since (except about an hour after the first shot after I'd replaced the gun with a ball retriever, at which time I'm sure the bastage just smirked at me). Alright, I'll be persistant and get the bastages sometime later this year (I hope).

So this morning, I noticed a couple holes in the lawn heading under the deck which I recognize as ground squirrel burrows (kind of a cross between a small rat, squirrel, mole, chipmunk). I've had success with them in the past with mouse and rat traps, so I set up a rat trap with some thistle seed. Check the traps and an hour later the seed is gone and the trap is not sprung. I assume the critter is either too small to trip the rat trap and just licked the damn seed off. I wised up and placed some peanut butter and thistle seed to the rat trap, and being the smart guy I am, also set a much smaller mouse trap with the same concoction. Bastages can't outsmart an intelligent guy like me.

Not an hour later, I check the rat trap and nothing, still set and waiting. I decide to scope out the mouse trap, and the sum***** is gone. I know it won't fit down the burrow hole, but I can't locate the damn thing anywhere.

So I've now got some muskrats that have no respect for my hunting abilities and one p.o.-ed ground squirrel I am sure is planning his vengeance.

I am so screwed.

Reruns of Caddy Shack are playing in my mind.

14holestogie · 04-26-2009, 05:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by taltos

Reruns of Caddy Shack are playing in my mind.

It's playing live in my backyard!

04-26-2009, 05:50 PM

This cracked me up.

TripleF · 04-26-2009, 06:23 PM

Skywalker · 04-26-2009, 07:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by taltos

Reruns of Caddy Shack are playing in my mind.

DPD6030 · 04-26-2009, 07:58 PM

You got a cheap scope on the .22 Tim, if not it may improve your odds.

lightning9191 · 04-26-2009, 07:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by taltos

Reruns of Caddy Shack are playing in my mind.

That's exactly what I was thinking.

14holestogie · 04-27-2009, 04:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DPD6030

You got a cheap scope on the .22 Tim, if not it may improve your odds.

It does have a scope and I was certain I hit the critter, but probably not a kill shot. Got a "skrat call" you could teach me?

dunng · 04-27-2009, 05:58 AM

Got any dynamite?

RevSmoke · 04-27-2009, 08:26 AM

Tim, you want to borrow Mocha for a week?

(for those who do not know, Mocha is our dog - and we live appr. 4 miles from Tim)

14holestogie · 04-27-2009, 08:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RevSmoke

Tim, you want to borrow Mocha for a week?

(for those who do not know, Mocha is our dog - and we live appr. 4 miles from Tim)

Is Mocha a mouser? I don't need a retriever.

DPD6030 · 04-27-2009, 08:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 14holestogie

It does have a scope and I was certain I hit the critter, but probably not a kill shot. Got a "skrat call" you could teach me?

Here skrat skrat skrat, here skrat skrat skrat

Maybe an upgrade to a .22 mag. would do the trick

14holestogie · 04-27-2009, 08:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DPD6030

Here skrat skrat skrat, here skrat skrat skrat

Maybe an upgrade to a .22 mag. would do the trick

I'll try that call. Not real confident, though.

.22 hollow points will do the trick, if the bastages ever show!

04-27-2009, 09:02 AM

Tim's theme song.

14holestogie · 04-27-2009, 09:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ahc4353

Tim's theme song.

Thanks, Al. Now they got names.

That'll make it harder to end their whirling and twirling with my muzzle (NOT)!

DPD6030 · 04-27-2009, 09:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 14holestogie

I'll try that call. Not real confident, though.

.22 hollow points will do the trick, if the bastages ever show!

Headshots enough said!

04-27-2009, 09:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DPD6030

Headshots enough said!

You ASSUME he can shoot.

04-26-2009, 05:06 PM	#1
14holestogie Serial banter killer Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Tim Location: Clintonville, WI Posts: 4,341 Trading: (52)	The Great White Hunter? So, I live on the 14th hole of my local golf club which has a large water hazard bordering 2 holes. While a great place to collect balls, in the last year or so, the banks have begun caving in many different places. Muskrats are the cause, and I am (or thought I was) the solution. The first couple of times I saw them swimming out there, I took the only weapon I had which was a pellet gun. They are some tough skinned bastages and all they'd do was give me a WTF look after plunking them. So I wised up and borrowed the BIL .22. Managed to get a couple of the critters last year while they were cavorting on the ice just before it all melted. Problem solved for all of last year. This year, I've seen another (and the guy who sets the tees in the morning says he's seen two). I've gotten one shot off at one of them from about 80 yards when he presented me with the tiny target of himself swimming and I haven't seen them since (except about an hour after the first shot after I'd replaced the gun with a ball retriever, at which time I'm sure the bastage just smirked at me). Alright, I'll be persistant and get the bastages sometime later this year (I hope). So this morning, I noticed a couple holes in the lawn heading under the deck which I recognize as ground squirrel burrows (kind of a cross between a small rat, squirrel, mole, chipmunk). I've had success with them in the past with mouse and rat traps, so I set up a rat trap with some thistle seed. Check the traps and an hour later the seed is gone and the trap is not sprung. I assume the critter is either too small to trip the rat trap and just licked the damn seed off. I wised up and placed some peanut butter and thistle seed to the rat trap, and being the smart guy I am, also set a much smaller mouse trap with the same concoction. Bastages can't outsmart an intelligent guy like me. Not an hour later, I check the rat trap and nothing, still set and waiting. I decide to scope out the mouse trap, and the sum*** is gone. I know it won't fit down the burrow hole, but I can't locate the damn thing anywhere. So I've now got some muskrats that have no respect for my hunting abilities and one p.o.-ed ground squirrel I am sure is planning his vengeance. I am so screwed. __________________ I loves me a Parti**

04-26-2009, 05:09 PM	#2
G G BR549 Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Greg Location: Taylor, FL. Posts: 12,701 Trading: (10)	Re: The Gerat White Hunter? Muskrats-groundsquirells 4 Tim 0 hahahahah

04-26-2009, 05:20 PM	#3
WildBlueSooner I'm nuts for the place Join Date: Feb 2009 First Name: James Location: Lexington, KY Posts: 3,322 Trading: (19)	Re: The Gerat White Hunter? That story is hilarious! I have faith that you will eventually get revenge! __________________ "To dilute the will to win is to destroy the purpose of the game. There is no substitute for victory"-- Douglas MacArthur

04-26-2009, 05:50 PM	#6
Kwilkinson Guest Posts: n/a	Re: The Gerat White Hunter? This cracked me up.

04-26-2009, 06:23 PM	#7
TripleF 11/11/11 EPIC IV Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Scott Location: Clearwater, FL Posts: 5,626 Trading: (176)	Re: The Gerat White Hunter? __________________ Cool Cigar Shirts, Stickers & More

04-26-2009, 07:58 PM	#9
DPD6030 Shepard of the sheeple Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Andrew Location: The Mitten Posts: 7,166 Trading: (151)	Re: The Gerat White Hunter? You got a cheap scope on the .22 Tim, if not it may improve your odds.

04-27-2009, 05:58 AM	#12
dunng MassHole Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Greg Location: MassHole Posts: 4,719 Trading: (59)	Re: The Gerat White Hunter? Got any dynamite? __________________ MassHole Banter

04-27-2009, 08:26 AM	#13
RevSmoke Ain't Never Gonna Leave Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Todd Location: Northcentral woods of Wisconsin Posts: 6,806 Trading: (51)	Re: The Great White Hunter? Tim, you want to borrow Mocha for a week? (for those who do not know, Mocha is our dog - and we live appr. 4 miles from Tim) __________________ Todd__ "Smoke what you like, and enjoy it!"

04-27-2009, 09:02 AM	#17
ahc4353 Guest Posts: n/a	Re: The Great White Hunter? Tim's theme song.

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Switch to Hybrid Mode Switch to Threaded Mode