Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum  

Register FAQ Inmates List Calendar
Go Back   Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum > Non Cigar Specialty Forums > Misc > Jokes
Reload this Page What happens.....
Today's Posts

Reply
Page 1 of 2 1 2 >
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 04-27-2011, 03:17 PM   #1
MajorCaptSilly
Sklee
 
MajorCaptSilly's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Scott
Location: Mishawaka, IN
Posts: 2,523
Trading: (30)
Bolivar
MajorCaptSilly has disabled reputation
Default What happens.....
What happens when you get scared half to death........TWICE?!?

MCS
__________________
Pillsbury, Minneapolis, Prince, Spoon Bridge and Cherry, coinkydink?
MajorCaptSilly is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-27-2011, 04:07 PM   #2
Texan in Mexico
Feeling at Home
 
Texan in Mexico's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Travis
Location: Puerto Morelos, Mexico
Posts: 958
Trading: (0)
LGC
Texan in Mexico has disabled reputation
Default Re: What happens.....
Who is the greatest underwater spy?
Posted via Mobile Device
Texan in Mexico is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-27-2011, 04:19 PM   #3
replicant_argent
Gravy Boat Winnah.
 
replicant_argent's Avatar
6
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Pete
Location: my attorney has advised against giving this information to insane people
Posts: 5,326
Trading: (22)
LGC
replicant_argent is a name known to allreplicant_argent is a name known to allreplicant_argent is a name known to allreplicant_argent is a name known to allreplicant_argent is a name known to allreplicant_argent is a name known to all
Default Re: What happens.....
The same thing as when you go just over halfway into the forest, and still keep going in.. or is it out?
__________________
www.stogietorch.com
Some days call for a stiff Pomade.
replicant_argent is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-27-2011, 04:36 PM   #4
J0eybb
Feeling up at Home
 
J0eybb's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
First Name: Joe
Location: Las Vegas
Posts: 1,084
Trading: (5)
J0eybb will become famous soon enough
Default Re: What happens.....
Quote:
Originally Posted by replicant_argent View Post
The same thing as when you go just over halfway into the forest, and still keep going in.. or is it out?
How far can you run into the forest?
J0eybb is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-27-2011, 07:46 PM   #5
mhailey
Splitter of Hairs
 
mhailey's Avatar
1
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
First Name: Matt
Location: out west
Posts: 492
Trading: (21)
mhailey has a spectacular aura aboutmhailey has a spectacular aura aboutmhailey has a spectacular aura about
Default Re: What happens.....
Quote:
Originally Posted by MajorCaptSilly View Post
What happens when you get scared half to death........TWICE?!?

MCS
Easy! You would be 3/4 the way toward death.
__________________
Never try and teach a pig to sing. It frustrates you and irritates the pig.
mhailey is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-27-2011, 07:55 PM   #6
MurphysLaw
Anything can go wrong
 
MurphysLaw's Avatar
2
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
First Name: Brian
Location: SoFlo
Posts: 2,823
Trading: (19)
Partagas
MurphysLaw is just really niceMurphysLaw is just really niceMurphysLaw is just really niceMurphysLaw is just really niceMurphysLaw is just really nice
Default Re: What happens.....
Quote:
Originally Posted by mhailey View Post
Easy! You would be 3/4 the way toward death.
MurphysLaw is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-27-2011, 08:40 PM   #7
Emjaysmash
The Hebrew Hammer
 
Emjaysmash's Avatar
1
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: M.J.
Location: Milwaukee, WI
Posts: 7,025
Trading: (76)
Emjaysmash is a splendid one to beholdEmjaysmash is a splendid one to beholdEmjaysmash is a splendid one to beholdEmjaysmash is a splendid one to beholdEmjaysmash is a splendid one to beholdEmjaysmash is a splendid one to behold
Default Re: What happens.....
How many times would one have to scare himself half to death to die?
__________________
Emjaysmash is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-27-2011, 11:34 PM   #8
Silound
ex-CS Swamp Gorilla
 
Silound's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Somewhere in a swamp, south of sanity
Posts: 802
Trading: (15)
Bolivar
Silound will become famous soon enough
Default Re: What happens.....
Quote:
Originally Posted by Emjaysmash View Post
How many times would one have to scare himself half to death to die?
Calculating that would entail the limit from 0 as x -> infinity of 1/x and some other calculus stuff I've forgotten a long time ago

Suffice to say that, while you never technically get there, you get so infinitely and microscopically close that mathematically you arrive at the point of death.
__________________
Back in black, and better than ever! You can't keep a good gorilla down!
LSU Geaux Tigers!
Silound is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-28-2011, 12:33 PM   #9
Skywalker
BABOTL
 
Skywalker's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Dice
Location: Galaxy Far Far Away
Posts: 10,168
Trading: (18)
Partagas
Skywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud of
Default Re: What happens.....
Half-wits!!!
__________________

Smoke what you like!!!
Skywalker is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-29-2011, 07:20 AM   #10
JaKaacH
ROCK Chalk JAYHAWK K U
 
JaKaacH's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Jeff
Location: Living in the golden age of ignorance in power.
Posts: 1,363
Trading: (32)
RA
JaKaacH has disabled reputation
Default Re: What happens.....
If you were in your Prius traveling at the speed of light, and turned your headlights on. Would they work??????
__________________
--Anger Management Graduate--
WHAT the F^#% you looking at???
JaKaacH is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-29-2011, 07:32 AM   #11
mhailey
Splitter of Hairs
 
mhailey's Avatar
1
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
First Name: Matt
Location: out west
Posts: 492
Trading: (21)
mhailey has a spectacular aura aboutmhailey has a spectacular aura aboutmhailey has a spectacular aura about
Default Re: What happens.....
Quote:
Originally Posted by JaKaacH View Post
If you were in your Prius traveling at the speed of light, and turned your headlights on. Would they work??????
HELL NO, because I wouldn't be caught dead in a Prius!!
__________________
Never try and teach a pig to sing. It frustrates you and irritates the pig.
mhailey is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-29-2011, 07:38 AM   #12
shilala
Dear Lord, Thank You.
 
shilala's Avatar
6
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Scott
Posts: 13,721
Trading: (252)
Cuaba
shilala has a reputation beyond reputeshilala has a reputation beyond reputeshilala has a reputation beyond reputeshilala has a reputation beyond reputeshilala has a reputation beyond reputeshilala has a reputation beyond reputeshilala has a reputation beyond reputeshilala has a reputation beyond reputeshilala has a reputation beyond reputeshilala has a reputation beyond reputeshilala has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: What happens.....
Quote:
Originally Posted by Silound View Post
Calculating that would entail the limit from 0 as x -> infinity of 1/x and some other calculus stuff I've forgotten a long time ago

Suffice to say that, while you never technically get there, you get so infinitely and microscopically close that mathematically you arrive at the point of death.
There's a big difference between mostly dead and all dead. Mostly dead is slightly alive. With all dead, well, with all dead there's usually only one thing you can do.
__________________
shilala is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-29-2011, 09:10 AM   #13
Emjaysmash
The Hebrew Hammer
 
Emjaysmash's Avatar
1
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: M.J.
Location: Milwaukee, WI
Posts: 7,025
Trading: (76)
Emjaysmash is a splendid one to beholdEmjaysmash is a splendid one to beholdEmjaysmash is a splendid one to beholdEmjaysmash is a splendid one to beholdEmjaysmash is a splendid one to beholdEmjaysmash is a splendid one to behold
Default Re: What happens.....
Quote:
Originally Posted by shilala View Post
There's a big difference between mostly dead and all dead. Mostly dead is slightly alive. With all dead, well, with all dead there's usually only one thing you can do.
"What's that?"

"Go through his clothes and look for loose change."
__________________
Emjaysmash is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-29-2011, 09:19 AM   #14
357
Will herf for food
 
357's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Mike
Location: Home is where I park it
Posts: 4,075
Trading: (9)
VR
357 is a splendid one to behold357 is a splendid one to behold357 is a splendid one to behold357 is a splendid one to behold357 is a splendid one to behold357 is a splendid one to behold
Default Re: What happens.....
Quote:
Originally Posted by Emjaysmash View Post
"What's that?"

"Go through his clothes and look for loose change."
Have fun storming the castle!
__________________
“Eating and sleeping are the only activities that should be allowed to interrupt a man's enjoyment of his cigar;” Mark Twain
357 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-29-2011, 11:06 AM   #15
Blindjimme
Judgement Impaired
 
Blindjimme's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
First Name: JB
Location: North OC, CA
Posts: 790
Trading: (14)
Partagas Navy (Served With Honor)
Blindjimme will become famous soon enough
Default Re: What happens.....
Quote:
Originally Posted by MajorCaptSilly View Post
What happens when you get scared half to death........TWICE?!?

MCS
This is some kind of a test. I don't test well.
Blindjimme is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-29-2011, 12:26 PM   #16
N2 GOLD
MIND OVER MATTER...
 
N2 GOLD's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
First Name: RICO
Location: So. CAL 33° 44' 44" N / 117° 52' 0" W
Posts: 2,330
Trading: (1)
SCdlH
N2 GOLD will become famous soon enoughN2 GOLD will become famous soon enough
Default Re: What happens.....
Quote:
Originally Posted by MajorCaptSilly View Post
What happens when you get scared half to death........TWICE?!?

MCS
You live to tell about it...
__________________
When I want your opinion, I'll give it to ya.
N2 GOLD is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-29-2011, 03:30 PM   #17
Starscream
Knowhutimean, Vern?
 
Starscream's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Andy
Location: In a little town somewhere in the USA
Posts: 10,237
Trading: (4)
Partagas
Starscream is a splendid one to beholdStarscream is a splendid one to beholdStarscream is a splendid one to beholdStarscream is a splendid one to beholdStarscream is a splendid one to beholdStarscream is a splendid one to behold
Default Re: What happens.....
What happens if you eat cashews in the marmalade section of the library?
__________________

Insert quote here.
Starscream is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-29-2011, 03:56 PM   #18
Skywalker
BABOTL
 
Skywalker's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Dice
Location: Galaxy Far Far Away
Posts: 10,168
Trading: (18)
Partagas
Skywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud ofSkywalker has much to be proud of
Default Re: What happens.....
Quote:
Originally Posted by Starscream View Post
What happens if you eat cashews in the marmalade section of the library?
What?
__________________

Smoke what you like!!!
Skywalker is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-29-2011, 04:26 PM   #19
markem
Bunion
 
markem's Avatar
16
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Mark
Location: Second Star on the Right
Posts: 22,507
Trading: (47)
HUpmann
markem has disabled reputation
Default Re: What happens.....
When ...

You put your right foot in,
You put your right foot out;
You put your right foot in,
And you shake it all about.

and is that what it's all about?
__________________
I refuse to belong to any organization that would have me as a member.
~ Groucho Marx
markem is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-29-2011, 04:28 PM   #20
Starscream
Knowhutimean, Vern?
 
Starscream's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Andy
Location: In a little town somewhere in the USA
Posts: 10,237
Trading: (4)
Partagas
Starscream is a splendid one to beholdStarscream is a splendid one to beholdStarscream is a splendid one to beholdStarscream is a splendid one to beholdStarscream is a splendid one to beholdStarscream is a splendid one to behold
Default Re: What happens.....
Quote:
Originally Posted by Skywalker View Post
What?
When?
__________________

Insert quote here.
Starscream is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply
Page 1 of 2 1 2 >

« Previous Thread | Next Thread »

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 02:16 PM.

Contact Us - Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum - Archive - Top

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
All content is copyrighted jointly by Cigar Asylum and the content provider.