Dads advice - the day is approaching fast! - Page 2

J0eybb · 03-09-2010, 08:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Razorhog

I'm sure I'll have them saying some crazy stuff, but nothing that will get me or them in trouble.

Oh yeah, They eventually REPEAT everything, and I mean EVERYTHING.

CasaDooley · 03-09-2010, 09:57 AM

After 2 daughters and 2 grandsons, the words of the day are Patience and Understanding. Everything else you will learn as you go. Enjoy the ride!

rizzle · 03-09-2010, 10:14 AM

Two infant seats = twins.

My girls are now 15 months, and the best advice I can give a father to be of twins is you MUST have them on a schedule from day one and you've got to stick to it. To the tee. And have them do everything at the same time...two babies, one schedule. When they sleep you MAKE your wife sleep or otherwise she'll be screaming after a couple weeks. And it's a good idea for you to do the same. Learn to swaddle them tightly, they love it, and you don't want any arms moving around while they'e sleeping or they'll wake up. If your wife is planning on breast feeding and she has any trouble with it have her see a lactation specialist. I could go on and on but those would be my basics in preparation. Oh, one other thing. Forgo the basinettes and start them in their room from day one. Your few hours of sleep will thank me.

Your gonna love it, bro. It's a hell of a lot of work and you simply can't understand it unless you're a parent of multiples, but it is incredibly rewarding, interesting, and amazing to watch two little beings develop. Quite simply, your life will never be the same.

Razorhog · 03-09-2010, 10:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rizzle

Two infant seats = twins.

My girls are now 15 months, and the best advice I can give a father to be of twins is you MUST have them on a schedule from day one and you've got to stick to it. To the tee. And have them do everything at the same time...two babies, one schedule. When they sleep you MAKE your wife sleep or otherwise she'll be screaming after a couple weeks. And it's a good idea for you to do the same. Learn to swaddle them tightly, they love it, and you don't want any arms moving around while they'e sleeping or they'll wake up. If your wife is planning on breast feeding and she has any trouble with it have her see a lactation specialist. I could go on and on but those would be my basics in preparation. Oh, one other thing. Forgo the basinettes and start them in their room from day one. Your few hours of sleep will thank me.

Your gonna love it, bro. It's a hell of a lot of work and you simply can't understand it unless you're a parent of multiples, but it is incredibly rewarding, interesting, and amazing to watch two little beings develop. Quite simply, your life will never be the same.

Sounds like you are very wise in the ways of twins. I may be hitting you up for advice in the future!

Razorhog · 03-09-2010, 12:07 PM

They just did an ultrasound, both babies weigh 4.5 lbs. Not bad for 32 weeks gestation! (average weight for a singleton at 32 weeks is 3.75 lbs)

kenstogie · 03-09-2010, 12:11 PM

to add..... I see this sometimes and I am pretty sure everyone around here probably knows but worth the mention

kids are kids. they don't think like 35 yo men or whomever. They think like kids and do goofy kid $h!t. They learn and probably won't know until you teach them. After all it's your job to teach them.

ALWAYS follow through. If you don't they'll pick up on it and then your word has no value. That's not to say you should be a hard a$$ just that if you say your going to do something do it. Whether it's getting them ice cream or giving them a time out.

rizzle · 03-09-2010, 12:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Razorhog

They just did an ultrasound, both babies weigh 4.5 lbs. Not bad for 32 weeks gestation! (average weight for a singleton at 32 weeks is 3.75 lbs)

Not bad at all. Mine were 6-3 and 5-8 at birth. How long does the doc want her to go? My wife went to 38, could have probably made it to 40, but she was ready. It was starting to get to the point of being real uncomfortable for her.

If I'm not mistaken, they're good to go now. Seems like the magic number was 28 weeks.

Good luck man.

akumushi · 03-09-2010, 12:26 PM

Another aside about breastfeeding, if your wife has trouble, formula is totally fine
do not let her listen to those Leche League nutjobs that will tell her that supplementing is the work of the devil.

kenstogie · 03-09-2010, 12:58 PM

yup breast feeding, that's an upside to having babies, to bad you never get to touch them

bawahhahah!

Razorhog · 03-09-2010, 01:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rizzle

Not bad at all. Mine were 6-3 and 5-8 at birth. How long does the doc want her to go? My wife went to 38, could have probably made it to 40, but she was ready. It was starting to get to the point of being real uncomfortable for her.

If I'm not mistaken, they're good to go now. Seems like the magic number was 28 weeks.

Good luck man.

Doc said he wants her to go as long as 38 weeks or until they are both 8 lbs, whichever comes first. That was said in a jovial manner, but it's possible they could be that big...

MajorCaptSilly · 03-09-2010, 01:55 PM

I can go on for days on this subject. I always knew my parents loved me but they almost never showed any affection for my brother & I. We never got hugs or "I love you's" from mom or dad. It didn't really affect me until I had my own kids. I've never missed a chance to hug them, tell them "I love you", or "I'm proud of you". It was just a natural thing to do for me. It wasn't uncomfortable or forced in any way. I started wondering if my parent's felt the same love for me that I felt for my kids. I think they did but just didn't know how to express the emotion. As I see my kids almost grown, I believe that their knowing the love that my wife and I feel for them has helped a great deal with their self-esteem. They're both very bright but more important than that, they are very caring people.

Make sure to give your kids a chance to be kids. I see too many parents who push their kids so hard from an early age in academics & sports that it is really scary. If they are so focused on the non-fun stuff through their childhood, they will inevitably make up for it when they become adults.

This may sound weird, but never let your kids beat you in sports. The time will come when they will win and it is the sweetest victory in the world for them when they do. My son still talks about the time he first beat me in basketball and actually told me he was glad I never let him win.

MCS

03-09-2010, 01:55 PM

Sounds like everybody is giving you great advice on the baby points, but don't forget mommy! What I did when both of my kids where born was always take the night shift so that she could get some rest. She is working hard enough to get them here and she has many years of hard work ahead of her, of course both of you do but most mothers end up doing more. Also some roses and nice card for her after the birth just to let her know she is still important. You will be the best husband and father on the face of the earth, because trust me her friends are *****ing about their husbands.

Congrats and enjoy ever minute because they will be the best things that ever happened to you!!!!

Razorhog · 03-09-2010, 02:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MajorCaptSilly

I can go on for days on this subject. I always knew my parents loved me but they almost never showed any affection for my brother & I. We never got hugs or "I love you's" from mom or dad. It didn't really affect me until I had my own kids. I've never missed a chance to hug them, tell them "I love you", or "I'm proud of you". It was just a natural thing to do for me. It wasn't uncomfortable or forced in any way. I started wondering if my parent's felt the same love for me that I felt for my kids. I think they did but just didn't know how to express the emotion. As I see my kids almost grown, I believe that their knowing the love that my wife and I feel for them has helped a great deal with their self-esteem. They're both very bright but more important than that, they are very caring people.

MCS

My mom was always very loving, but my dad was not. He never said I love you, and never even hugged me when I was little. He did love me though, very much. He was a provider - worked hard for me and my brother. He was a firefighter in Little Rock for 30 years. Just not the emotional type. I saw him cry twice - once when his brother died, and once when I forgot to show up for a mid-week family thanksgiving dinner and they were worried sick about me.
I want to be both a provider and show my kids affection. Life is too short.

Commander Quan · 03-09-2010, 02:17 PM

Nice choice on the Sienna. For some reason this was the vehicle my insurance company rented me one while my car was in the body shop, it was awesome. I drove around all week practicing yelling at my nonexistent kids in the back seat. I got pretty good with "Don't make me come back there" and I'll turn this damn car around" but still need some practice with "I'll give you something to cry about"

RGD. · 03-10-2010, 08:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tx_tuff

. . . but don't forget mommy! . . .

This is extremely important that often gets overlooked. Post depression is very real no matter how minor. A ton of attention is going to go to those boys and rightfully so - but your wife needs the care also.

In a nutshell do whatever, whenever you can around the house and for her with out being asked. Same deal at night - handle everything you can without her having to get up. Sure you will be worn out - but it comes with the territory and doesn't last forever.

Congrats!

Ron

Razorhog · 03-10-2010, 08:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Commander Quan

Nice choice on the Sienna. For some reason this was the vehicle my insurance company rented me one while my car was in the body shop, it was awesome. I drove around all week practicing yelling at my nonexistent kids in the back seat. I got pretty good with "Don't make me come back there" and I'll turn this damn car around" but still need some practice with "I'll give you something to cry about"

I need to start working on some of those too!

Lucky_Hippo · 03-10-2010, 08:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CigarNut

Congratulations! Babies bring a whole new world of wonder to your life.

But, to be blunt: Babies are like leeches, they take a lot of your time and energy which you never get back (you get love and smiles from them, but when you're over tired, love and smiles may not be enough). This can make you frustrated.

When (not if) you get frustrated with your baby, walk away -- no matter what. Never take your frustration or anger out on the child. Shaken-baby syndrome is nothing that you want for you or your baby.

If you do want to shake your baby, make a note to remind you later and then shake them up good when they are teenagers. Might shake some sense into them then -- although with my kids it's hard to tell

WOW, umm not bad advise, however, I'm just gonna add, that if you ever EVER feel the need to shake an infant, don't just walk away and cool off. Walk away and get some help. This isn't normal. There is a HUGE difference in frustrated and mentally unstable.

You're gonna be a great father if you just let yourself be part of their world!

Congratulations man!

Razorhog · 03-26-2010, 08:01 AM

Well we are still in the hospital - wife is now 34 weeks pregnant. Only a few more weeks to go! Each baby is 5.5 lbs right now and gaining about .5 lbs per week! Shooting for 37 weeks and 7 lbs each!

Scottw · 03-26-2010, 08:39 AM

The days are long but the years are short. One day they are crawling on your living room floor, the next they are running across it and before you know it they are asking to borrow the car. Enjoy every second.

rizzle · 03-26-2010, 01:52 PM

Awesome, bro. Awesome. Just this week I was thinking about you as I was installing the girls' new forward facing car seats. Another step. Onward.

03-09-2010, 09:57 AM	#22
CasaDooley Herf Crew of 2 Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Kevin Location: The birthplace of Fathers Day Posts: 2,465 Trading: (41)	Re: Dads advice - the day is approaching fast! After 2 daughters and 2 grandsons, the words of the day are Patience and Understanding. Everything else you will learn as you go. Enjoy the ride! __________________ *Founding member of the Lilac City Dedicated Herfers*

03-09-2010, 10:14 AM	#23
rizzle Order Restored Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: st pete, fl Posts: 2,679 Trading: (23)	Re: Dads advice - the day is approaching fast! Two infant seats = twins. My girls are now 15 months, and the best advice I can give a father to be of twins is you MUST have them on a schedule from day one and you've got to stick to it. To the tee. And have them do everything at the same time...two babies, one schedule. When they sleep you MAKE your wife sleep or otherwise she'll be screaming after a couple weeks. And it's a good idea for you to do the same. Learn to swaddle them tightly, they love it, and you don't want any arms moving around while they'e sleeping or they'll wake up. If your wife is planning on breast feeding and she has any trouble with it have her see a lactation specialist. I could go on and on but those would be my basics in preparation. Oh, one other thing. Forgo the basinettes and start them in their room from day one. Your few hours of sleep will thank me. Your gonna love it, bro. It's a hell of a lot of work and you simply can't understand it unless you're a parent of multiples, but it is incredibly rewarding, interesting, and amazing to watch two little beings develop. Quite simply, your life will never be the same.

03-09-2010, 12:07 PM	#25
Razorhog Feeling at Home Join Date: Jul 2009 First Name: Beau Location: NE Arkansas Posts: 600 Trading: (4)	Re: Dads advice - the day is approaching fast! They just did an ultrasound, both babies weigh 4.5 lbs. Not bad for 32 weeks gestation! (average weight for a singleton at 32 weeks is 3.75 lbs)

03-09-2010, 12:11 PM	#26
kenstogie following the whiterabbit Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Albany, NY Posts: 1,325 Trading: (3)	Re: Dads advice - the day is approaching fast! to add..... I see this sometimes and I am pretty sure everyone around here probably knows but worth the mention kids are kids. they don't think like 35 yo men or whomever. They think like kids and do goofy kid $h!t. They learn and probably won't know until you teach them. After all it's your job to teach them. ALWAYS follow through. If you don't they'll pick up on it and then your word has no value. That's not to say you should be a hard a$$ just that if you say your going to do something do it. Whether it's getting them ice cream or giving them a time out. __________________ I intend to live forever. So far, so good.

03-09-2010, 12:26 PM	#28
akumushi Habanos Apologist Join Date: May 2009 Posts: 1,298 Trading: (11)	Re: Dads advice - the day is approaching fast! Another aside about breastfeeding, if your wife has trouble, formula is totally fine do not let her listen to those Leche League nutjobs that will tell her that supplementing is the work of the devil. __________________ "Eventually, however, every ash must drop. And the drop usually is as sudden as it is final."

03-09-2010, 12:58 PM	#29
kenstogie following the whiterabbit Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Albany, NY Posts: 1,325 Trading: (3)	Re: Dads advice - the day is approaching fast! yup breast feeding, that's an upside to having babies, to bad you never get to touch them bawahhahah! __________________ I intend to live forever. So far, so good.

03-09-2010, 01:55 PM	#31
MajorCaptSilly Sklee Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Scott Location: Mishawaka, IN Posts: 2,523 Trading: (30)	Re: Dads advice - the day is approaching fast! I can go on for days on this subject. I always knew my parents loved me but they almost never showed any affection for my brother & I. We never got hugs or "I love you's" from mom or dad. It didn't really affect me until I had my own kids. I've never missed a chance to hug them, tell them "I love you", or "I'm proud of you". It was just a natural thing to do for me. It wasn't uncomfortable or forced in any way. I started wondering if my parent's felt the same love for me that I felt for my kids. I think they did but just didn't know how to express the emotion. As I see my kids almost grown, I believe that their knowing the love that my wife and I feel for them has helped a great deal with their self-esteem. They're both very bright but more important than that, they are very caring people. Make sure to give your kids a chance to be kids. I see too many parents who push their kids so hard from an early age in academics & sports that it is really scary. If they are so focused on the non-fun stuff through their childhood, they will inevitably make up for it when they become adults. This may sound weird, but never let your kids beat you in sports. The time will come when they will win and it is the sweetest victory in the world for them when they do. My son still talks about the time he first beat me in basketball and actually told me he was glad I never let him win. MCS __________________ Pillsbury, Minneapolis, Prince, Spoon Bridge and Cherry, coinkydink?

03-09-2010, 01:55 PM	#32
tx_tuff Guest Posts: n/a	Re: Dads advice - the day is approaching fast! Sounds like everybody is giving you great advice on the baby points, but don't forget mommy! What I did when both of my kids where born was always take the night shift so that she could get some rest. She is working hard enough to get them here and she has many years of hard work ahead of her, of course both of you do but most mothers end up doing more. Also some roses and nice card for her after the birth just to let her know she is still important. You will be the best husband and father on the face of the earth, because trust me her friends are *****ing about their husbands. Congrats and enjoy ever minute because they will be the best things that ever happened to you!!!!

03-09-2010, 02:17 PM	#34
Commander Quan Feeling at Home Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Derrick Location: Canton, OH Posts: 966 Trading: (4)	Re: Dads advice - the day is approaching fast! Nice choice on the Sienna. For some reason this was the vehicle my insurance company rented me one while my car was in the body shop, it was awesome. I drove around all week practicing yelling at my nonexistent kids in the back seat. I got pretty good with "Don't make me come back there" and I'll turn this damn car around" but still need some practice with "I'll give you something to cry about"

03-26-2010, 08:01 AM	#38
Razorhog Feeling at Home Join Date: Jul 2009 First Name: Beau Location: NE Arkansas Posts: 600 Trading: (4)	Re: Dads advice - the day is approaching fast! Well we are still in the hospital - wife is now 34 weeks pregnant. Only a few more weeks to go! Each baby is 5.5 lbs right now and gaining about .5 lbs per week! Shooting for 37 weeks and 7 lbs each!

03-26-2010, 08:39 AM	#39
Scottw Going Commando Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Scott Location: Sussex, NJ Posts: 2,810 Trading: (6)	Re: Dads advice - the day is approaching fast! The days are long but the years are short. One day they are crawling on your living room floor, the next they are running across it and before you know it they are asking to borrow the car. Enjoy every second.

03-26-2010, 01:52 PM	#40
rizzle Order Restored Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: st pete, fl Posts: 2,679 Trading: (23)	Re: Dads advice - the day is approaching fast! Awesome, bro. Awesome. Just this week I was thinking about you as I was installing the girls' new forward facing car seats. Another step. Onward.