Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum  

Go Back   Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum > Non Cigar Specialty Forums > Misc > Jokes

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 06-24-2009, 03:07 PM   #1
pnoon
YNWA
 
pnoon's Avatar
16
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Peter
Location: San Diego
Posts: 29,919
Trading: (20)
RA
pnoon has disabled reputation
Default Golf Joke

It was a sunny morning, a little before 8:00 AM on the first hole of a
busy course, and Tony was beginning his pre-shot routine, visualizing
the upcoming shot when a piercing voice came over the clubhouse
loudspeaker:

"Would the gentleman on the women's tee please back up to the men's
tee, please?"

Tony could feel every eye on the course looking at him. But, he was
still deep in his routine and seemingly impervious to the interruption.

Again the announcement: "Would the man on the women's tee please back
up to the men's tee, please!"

Tony simply ignored him and kept on concentrating on his shot.

Once more the voice yelled, "Would the man on the women's tee please
back up to the men's tee, please!"

Tony finally stopped, turned, cupped his hands and shouted back....
"Would the asshole with the microphone kindly keep quiet and let me
play my second shot?"
__________________
Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are.
-John Wooden
pnoon is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-24-2009, 03:10 PM   #2
Mugen910
I <3 Huy
 
Mugen910's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Location
Location: First Name
Posts: 8,387
Trading: (106)
HUpmann MarineCorps (Served With Honor)
Mugen910 has disabled reputation
Default Re: Golf Joke

Quote:
Originally Posted by pnoon View Post
It was a sunny morning, a little before 8:00 AM on the first hole of a
busy course, and Tony was beginning his pre-shot routine, visualizing
the upcoming shot when a piercing voice came over the clubhouse
loudspeaker:

"Would the gentleman on the women's tee please back up to the men's
tee, please?"

Tony could feel every eye on the course looking at him. But, he was
still deep in his routine and seemingly impervious to the interruption.

Again the announcement: "Would the man on the women's tee please back
up to the men's tee, please!"

Tony simply ignored him and kept on concentrating on his shot.

Once more the voice yelled, "Would the man on the women's tee please
back up to the men's tee, please!"

Tony finally stopped, turned, cupped his hands and shouted back....
"Would the asshole with the microphone kindly keep quiet and let me
play my second shot?"
I'm not saying a word... and I hope Vin and Moe don't either.
__________________
I'm not antisocial, I just think people are stupid.
Mugen910 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-24-2009, 03:28 PM   #3
ade06
Have My Own Room
 
ade06's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
First Name: Ade
Location: Philadelphia
Posts: 1,190
Trading: (24)
Trinidad
ade06 will become famous soon enoughade06 will become famous soon enough
Default Re: Golf Joke

lol
ade06 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-24-2009, 03:29 PM   #4
ahc4353
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default Re: Golf Joke

OMG it was Bao!

  Reply With Quote
Old 06-24-2009, 03:37 PM   #5
galaga
Just call me Slappy.
 
galaga's Avatar
8
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 1,832
Trading: (3)
galaga has a spectacular aura aboutgalaga has a spectacular aura about
Default Re: Golf Joke

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mugen910 View Post
I'm not saying a word... and I hope Vin and Moe don't either.
Were you using your red club or your blue club?????
__________________
I may be easy, but I'm sure as hell ain't cheap....
galaga is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-24-2009, 06:53 PM   #6
ca21455
Working on Reality
 
ca21455's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: John
Location: Backyard
Posts: 393
Trading: (7)
Navy (Served With Honor)
ca21455 is on a distinguished road
Default Re: Golf Joke

It only took one shot to get to the womens tee?
ca21455 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-24-2009, 06:55 PM   #7
12stones
Yo Mama is so...
 
12stones's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
First Name: Ricky
Location: Houston, TX
Posts: 184
Trading: (1)
RA MarineCorps (Disabled Vet)
12stones will become famous soon enough
Default Re: Golf Joke

HA! Bald and funny! You got it all, Peter.
12stones is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-24-2009, 07:05 PM   #8
MedicCook
Mila smoked my cigar
 
MedicCook's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
First Name: Ryan
Location: Schaghticoke, NY
Posts: 10,946
Trading: (7)
LGC
MedicCook has much to be proud ofMedicCook has much to be proud ofMedicCook has much to be proud ofMedicCook has much to be proud ofMedicCook has much to be proud ofMedicCook has much to be proud ofMedicCook has much to be proud ofMedicCook has much to be proud of
Default Re: Golf Joke

Watch out for dick out rules.
__________________
27 World Series Championship's
"If your wife doesn't like the aroma of your cigar, change your wife.", Zino Davidoff
MedicCook is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-24-2009, 07:12 PM   #9
St. Lou Stu
Have My Own Room
 
St. Lou Stu's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Tim
Location: Belleville, IL (St. Louis)
Posts: 2,304
Trading: (21)
HdM
St. Lou Stu is a jewel in the roughSt. Lou Stu is a jewel in the roughSt. Lou Stu is a jewel in the rough
Default Re: Golf Joke

Quote:
Originally Posted by pnoon View Post
It was a sunny morning, a little before 8:00 AM on the first hole of a
busy course, and Tony was beginning his pre-shot routine, visualizing
the upcoming shot when a piercing voice came over the clubhouse
loudspeaker:

"Would the gentleman on the women's tee please back up to the men's
tee, please?"

Tony could feel every eye on the course looking at him. But, he was
still deep in his routine and seemingly impervious to the interruption.

Again the announcement: "Would the man on the women's tee please back
up to the men's tee, please!"

Tony simply ignored him and kept on concentrating on his shot.

Once more the voice yelled, "Would the man on the women's tee please
back up to the men's tee, please!"

Tony finally stopped, turned, cupped his hands and shouted back....
"Would the asshole with the microphone kindly keep quiet and let me
play my second shot?"
That was a GREAT joke Peter!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mugen910 View Post
I'm not saying a word... and I hope Vin and Moe don't either.
Seeing you post second made me pee my pants Bao!
__________________

Pretending to play golf since 1989
St. Lou Stu is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-24-2009, 07:19 PM   #10
SmokeyJoe
Chief Wannastogie Lounge
 
SmokeyJoe's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
First Name: Joe
Location: Raleigh, NC
Posts: 3,160
Trading: (28)
VR
SmokeyJoe has much to be proud ofSmokeyJoe has much to be proud ofSmokeyJoe has much to be proud ofSmokeyJoe has much to be proud ofSmokeyJoe has much to be proud ofSmokeyJoe has much to be proud ofSmokeyJoe has much to be proud ofSmokeyJoe has much to be proud of
Default Re: Golf Joke

Thanks, Peter! Appreciate the laugh...
__________________
"I intend to smoke a good cigar to the glory of God..." ~ Charles H. Spurgeon, British Baptist preacher
SmokeyJoe is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-24-2009, 08:19 PM   #11
karmaz00
Habanos
 
karmaz00's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
First Name: Jason
Location: victoria
Posts: 1,855
Trading: (1)
Partagas
karmaz00 is on a distinguished road
Default Re: Golf Joke

hahahah
__________________
_______
Habanos Collector Since 2003
karmaz00 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-24-2009, 08:30 PM   #12
ucla695
Neither here, nor there
 
ucla695's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: The Pool
Posts: 3,696
Trading: (5)
Montecristo
ucla695 has disabled reputation
Default Re: Golf Joke

Oh the shame. My friends and I play that if you don't hit it past the women's tee then you're buying drinks after the round.
ucla695 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 08:07 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
All content is copyrighted jointly by Cigar Asylum and the content provider.