Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum  

Go Back   Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum > Non Cigar Specialty Forums > Misc > Jokes

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 01-03-2011, 06:44 PM   #1
cmitch
Heads up get down
 
cmitch's Avatar
4
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
First Name: Clayton
Location: NW Alabama by the river
Posts: 2,720
Trading: (25)
Montecristo
cmitch is just really nicecmitch is just really nicecmitch is just really nicecmitch is just really nicecmitch is just really nice
Default Attempted pickup

A man is sitting at a bar and notices a HOT red hed sitting across from him. Feeling his oats, he decides to strike up a conversation with her.

"What's up, babe?"

"I'm not interested."

"Oh, come on honey, I just want to talk."

"I only like muslims and jews", rebuffs the lady.

"Why's that?" asks the guy.

"Because they're hung like a horse!" she retorts.

"Well, just ain't that a coincidence. I just happen to be right up your street, babe."

"What's your name?", asks the red head.

"Muhammad Goldstein".
__________________
No matter what one's status is in society, cigars are the great equalizer where the affluent and common share a love for the leaf. - Me.
cmitch is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-03-2011, 06:48 PM   #2
tobii3
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default Re: Attempted pickup

That's the WORST re-telling of the Geronimo Goldberg joke ever!



Quote:
A man sat down in an airplane seat next to an extremely attractive woman. They started to chat. "What do you do for a living?", the man asked the beautiful female.

"Actually, I'm a sex researcher", she said.

"Wow" said the man, "that must be fascinating." Assuming her to be an expert the man decides to ask her a few questions.

"First of all, I've always heard black men have the largest sex organs, is that true?" he asked.

"No, not true at all. My reasearch indicates American Indian men by far have the largest male organs." she answered.

"Interesting" replied the man. "Well I've also heard that Italian men have the greatest love making technique, is that true?" he further asked.

"No that's also false, I have personally been involved in extensive research on this subject and have found Jewish men to be the world's greatest lovers, by far." said the woman.

As the airplane prepared to land the s*xy woman looks at the man and says, "It's been so nice chatting with you, by the way my name is Debbie Johnson from the Masters and Johnson clinic, what's your name?"

"Oh yes . . ." the man replies, "I'm Geronimo Goldberg."
  Reply With Quote
Old 01-03-2011, 08:03 PM   #3
htown
Feeling at Home
 
htown's Avatar
2
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
First Name: Mike
Location: Sugar Land
Posts: 877
Trading: (29)
RyJ
htown will become famous soon enoughhtown will become famous soon enough
Default Re: Attempted pickup

Steven Wright Joke:

One day I got on the bus, and when I stepped in, I saw the most gorgeous blond Chinese girl. I sat beside her.

I said, 'Hi', And she said, 'Hi', and then I said, 'Nice day, isn't it?'.

And she said, 'I saw my analyst today and he says I have a problem.'

So I asked, 'What's the problem?' She replied, 'I can't tell you. I don't even know you.'

I said, 'Well, sometimes it's good to tell your problems to a perfect stranger on a bus.'

So she said, 'Well, my analyst said I'm a nymphomaniac and I only like Jewish cowboys... By the way, my name is Denise.'

I said, 'Hello, Denise. My name is Bucky Goldstein.'.
htown is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-05-2011, 03:17 PM   #4
Krish the Fish
Still Watching My Back
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
First Name: Krishna
Location: Columbus, OH
Posts: 164
Trading: (2)
Trinidad
Krish the Fish is on a distinguished road
Default Re: Attempted pickup

I thought that all of these jokes were absolutely hilarious. Well played gents.
Krish the Fish is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 04:54 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
All content is copyrighted jointly by Cigar Asylum and the content provider.