What Cigar Best Fits Your Personality?

Apparently I am a Rocky Patel ITC. I live fast, play hard and are the envy of all my acquaintences. Psssssshhhhh. More like I'm broke, in the army, spend too much money on cigars and bass fishing stuff, and most of my friends tell me "You're cool to me, but your an asshole to everyone else" What kind of cigar does that sound like?