You will get opinions on this topic ad naseum, I will just give my opinion and then you go shoot some and pick your own, you cannot and I mean cannot go wrong with S&W M&P and Glock, simple to use and go bang everytime, and they are basically indestructible.
The M&P and the new Gen 4 Glocks have interchangeable (different size) backstraps to custom fit your hand, both have rails for mounting lights. I have shot 1,000's of rounds through both M&P's and Glocks and both are well suited for the needs you are stating. Only reason I go M&P is because I like the angle of the grip better and it's just a better feeling/looking gun my
Here is my full size M&P and my compact, also my full size Glock and compact.
