Here's an option that really hasn't been explored carefully...
Go to delloutlet.com, buy a $299 netbook, and spend the other $2000 on some badass cigars.
It's a good thing there's not a poll, cause I'm pretty sure this would be pretty much unanimous.

Either that, or just skip the computer altogether, borrow one from someone, and spend all $2300 on cigars.
That would be totally awesome.