Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum - View Single Post - Promise Ring, did you buy your daughter one?

tsolomon · 03-30-2009, 08:35 AM

Yes I have a daughter and she's 23, so I'll rock the boat and say no, I wouldn't buy one unless she asked for it. The why gets into all the various cliques and peer groups that you have to deal with at that age. I'm not sure that I would want my daughter to have to explain to the group why my parents gave me a promise ring that she didn't ask for. From my point of view, trust and keeping the lines of communications open between you and your daughter is the most important thing. The sex talk is good as well as the knowing when to leave talk. This is when the group she is with thinks about doing something stupid like drugs or shoplifting. It's the pick your battle approach to child rearing, where teaching them to think and make good decisions is what you have to rely on to get them through the teenage years.

My next question would be the one about what did growing up. Did you wait? This applies to sex, drugs and about anything else you would tell your kid not to do. For parents, it is a real dilemma; did you tell the truth about what you did growing up when asked? I know a lot of parents who have had to make this decision and it has gone both ways. We choose truth, but we left out the details. For us, it came down to trust and that goes both ways.

03-30-2009, 08:35 AM	#15
tsolomon Have My Own Room Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Tom Location: The Villages, FL Posts: 1,248 Trading: (31)	Re: Promise Ring, did you buy your daughter one? Yes I have a daughter and she's 23, so I'll rock the boat and say no, I wouldn't buy one unless she asked for it. The why gets into all the various cliques and peer groups that you have to deal with at that age. I'm not sure that I would want my daughter to have to explain to the group why my parents gave me a promise ring that she didn't ask for. From my point of view, trust and keeping the lines of communications open between you and your daughter is the most important thing. The sex talk is good as well as the knowing when to leave talk. This is when the group she is with thinks about doing something stupid like drugs or shoplifting. It's the pick your battle approach to child rearing, where teaching them to think and make good decisions is what you have to rely on to get them through the teenage years. My next question would be the one about what did growing up. Did you wait? This applies to sex, drugs and about anything else you would tell your kid not to do. For parents, it is a real dilemma; did you tell the truth about what you did growing up when asked? I know a lot of parents who have had to make this decision and it has gone both ways. We choose truth, but we left out the details. For us, it came down to trust and that goes both ways.