Katmancross

Before I lose all my friends and their goodwill....I need to explain these reviews/stories.
I know, I know.....these are not 1-2-3-bottom line reviews. I'm a funny guy. Famous liked the little blurb reviews I did on their web site if I liked a cigar. They had been looking for someone to do what I do. Here's the rub...I have a 750 word limit. That's 1-1/2 typed pages to develop Act 1, Act 2, and Act 3 plus get some kind of review in there. Try it. It's a b***h.
They wanted my character to be just short of a super hero. The coolest dude around. A time traveler. Indiana Jones is jealous of him. Mystical. But not a cartoon character. Again, try it.
I lived through the 1960's as a teenager. I loved the underground comics of the day. I loved the Marx Brothers and Woody Allen (when he was funny).
I'm a really sick writer but I have to reign it in big time. I have to hit a home run right down center field. Don't say hookers. Don't say this. Don't be gory. Even if it's all in fun.
I was told that that using bin Laden in a story could be Muslim bashing. ??
So please forgive me if the stories are silly. You need to have just finished your six pack when you read these. And just laugh because it's so stupid.
If I write a proper cigar review, which I can, there's no room for a story. So I have to balance everything like a blind juggler.
I'm doing something that no one with any integrity would be doing, at age 60, when it comes to cigars. Gimmee' a break. I'm living in a basement with my wife. We get $76 in food stamps. I have no money for cigars. And the cigar company gives me cigars for what I do.
As a result of this silly job, someone has offered me another writing job this week. And more may be coming in.
So don't hate me because you don't like the stories or the reviews...hate me because I'm fat and have bad breath.
Thanks.