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-   -   Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash! (http://www.cigarasylum.com/vb/showthread.php?t=13383)

Da Klugs 04-04-2009 03:18 PM

Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
I know many wives read here just to keep up with hubbies secret cigar life. Hi I'm Dave and I'm on your side. Rotten bastages constantly typing stuff into the computer at all hours instead of attending to your needs. Not even decent conversation just typing and typing.

It's just wrong. And now you have the opportunity to put your foot down and really make a statement they are going to understand. But only later much later, as there is an added benefit you can pick up some extra cash (yes untraceable greenbacks) for your shopping pleasure.

Tired of your spouse sneaking around ordering more than he tells you about? Can the dog really have eaten the past 6 months credit card bills each month? You know this is bullshit and your not going to take it anymore.

Starting tomorrow take a stand and take back some of your kids college fund that cigar boy has "invested in his stash". Let's start slowly and under the radar. While he is at work or sleeping head down to his humidor storage area. Please note cigar boy is sneaky. Those coolers in the basement he says are for 4th of July? You guessed it full of your new shoe money. Anyway, make a list of the names on the boxes. Please note the codes on the bottom. Some will have a few letters and then a month and year. Some will just have letters.. these are the ones that you can get some real shopping bang for the buck.

Write them down put your phone number and a good time to call on them and fax it in to...

1-800-get-even

We will get back to you within 24 hours. We realize you may be concerned as many of your husbands are maniacal and anal retentive about their cigars. If only they paid as much attention to you. Geez. So in order to cover our tracks, once we select which cigars will inflict the maximum justice on cigar boy and maximum spending $$ for you, we will send "replacement cigars" for you to substitute for the ones we are buying. Have no fear these are perfectly fine cigars made by the Tamboril and Cremosa cigar companies. Ashtray breath will never know the difference.

We'll start with the bottom row from boxes. Typically this will be 12 cigars. In case you are wondering what these might be worth... (as if it really matters it's justice we are looking for here.. can I get an amen?) depending upon the size and age of the cigars, you might get up to $ 10 per stick. If you trade out 50 cigars (that’s only about 4 boxes and hell he's got way too many already) this could be up to $ 500 per week for weeks and weeks and weeks.

I'm sure many of you have observed your husbands behavior in thinking he is receiving cigars behind your back, and sending cigars to others. Please be much more careful then they are in dealing with "our little secret". We will mail you all the mailing supplies to send the cigars to us along with the replacement cigars for those you send out.

We look forward to helping you take control of your life once again and await your fax.

Bonus Available.

Soon to be divorcees and or soon to be ex girfriends get an extra 20% for full box or even full collection submissions. Nothing says you'll remember me forever ahole like a nice humi cleaning.

Look forward to hearing from you ladies and happy shopping to all.

The Professor 04-04-2009 03:24 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
This is so wrong. :r:r:r:r:r

hotreds 04-04-2009 03:26 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by The Professor (Post 320421)
This is so wrong. :r:r:r:r

:tpd: Don't you got enuf?!!!

SilverFox 04-04-2009 03:28 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
I just pray my wife never finds this post.

markem 04-04-2009 03:28 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
That explains why the hand truck is in from the garage :r

14holestogie 04-04-2009 03:28 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Did my wife call you and set this up, Dave? :D

That sounds just like what I've been hearing ever since I started receiving foreign mail. :r

Ashcan Bill 04-04-2009 03:41 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by The Professor (Post 320421)
This is so wrong. :r:r:r:r

And on so many levels. :D

Queen James 04-04-2009 03:44 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Dave that is hilarious! I already have enough shoes ;)

AllOGistics 04-04-2009 03:45 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
That's hilarious. :r

Texan in Mexico 04-04-2009 03:52 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Man oh man...

I might have to move my vino to the office.

Tripp 04-04-2009 03:53 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by vstrommark (Post 320431)
That explains why the hand truck is in from the garage :r

I was thinking about heading over there to raid your stash, but it sound's like you've been cleaned out!

King James 04-04-2009 03:54 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
haha I'm locking my humi!

Don Fernando 04-04-2009 04:05 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Dave deserves a ban for this

Old Sailor 04-04-2009 04:15 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
:r:r:r

white_s2k 04-04-2009 04:17 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Don Fernando (Post 320469)
Dave deserves a ban for this

:tpd:

Can one of the other 11 take care of this for us? :r :r :r

Savor the Stick 04-04-2009 04:31 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
You're a Bad man!!!





:r:r:r

SixPackSunday 04-04-2009 04:42 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
I dont know if people should bump your rep or ding it.... :ss

Glad I'm not married!

qwerty1500 04-04-2009 04:59 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
That's it ... now, I have to log out after each visit and hope she doesn't guess my password ... until this little thread slips into history.

bobarian 04-04-2009 05:13 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Dave, That is just wrong on so many levels! I like it!

In fact if any of you spurned wives or girlfriends come upon boxes like these, I am willing to pay over the $10 a cigar Dave mentioned! :tu

http://img21.imageshack.us/img21/927...ionsuprema.jpg http://img21.imageshack.us/img21/404...ityopennc8.jpg

I can pay $15 a cigar for these stinky old cigars. Just drop me a PM!:dance:

lightning9191 04-04-2009 08:13 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Where is that block function??:r

I hope you like Black & Milds:D

Swampper 04-04-2009 08:20 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Seems ethical...

Sailchaser 04-04-2009 08:35 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
I felt like a trapped rat in a giant trap with the bar across my chest while my wife SAILKAT read you ever loving post out loud to me. Great Dave it took me 10 years to convince Kat that all boxes of cigars in the coolers in the basement weren't worth much and only cost $20.00 at most a box and all the extra coolers were actually for fishing,Years and years of work all down the drain.:bh:bh:bh

























































































Thanks a lot DAVE!!!!!

elderboy02 04-04-2009 08:40 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Is it possible to ban a moderator :r

Funny post Dave! :tu

ahc4353 04-05-2009 06:20 AM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by SilverFox (Post 320428)
I just pray my wife never finds this post.

I do have her email. :hm

Send a link or not is the question. :hm

KenS 04-05-2009 06:38 AM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
given the stash that Dave has, I'm figuring this process could upgrade my humidors. Hell, I would welcome what he calls "replacement cigars". What, only 15 years old instead of 25?

:r :r

SmokeyNL 04-05-2009 06:48 AM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
You could try emailing dan's soon to be ex wife (hardcz) :P

now if someone were to run accross something like this, I would help them get rid of it, even though they are old and crusty :ss

http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f3...L/PICT0024.jpg

ca21455 04-05-2009 08:37 AM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Just in case anyone reading this post was wondering, everyone of my cigars is inventoried, photographed and painstakingly documented on a spreadsheet with date of purchase, cost, vendor and physical description. The humidor location is identified and recorded and the cigars carefully stored.

Of course this is all done for insurance purposes...:D

WildBlueSooner 04-06-2009 01:36 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
holy hell...I am praying Kate does not find this!

Mugen910 04-06-2009 01:38 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Why was it that I read this post with the Sham-wow guy's voice doing a voice over? :D

hova45 04-06-2009 01:48 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by bobarian (Post 320533)
Dave, That is just wrong on so many levels! I like it!

In fact if any of you spurned wives or girlfriends come upon boxes like these, I am willing to pay over the $10 a cigar Dave mentioned! :tu

http://img21.imageshack.us/img21/927...ionsuprema.jpg http://img21.imageshack.us/img21/404...ityopennc8.jpg

I can pay $15 a cigar for these stinky old cigars. Just drop me a PM!:dance:

Count me in too, I love this thread glad you brought it with you!

maverickdrinker 04-06-2009 01:52 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
I have 3 words for you

Off
site
storage

kelmac07 05-05-2009 05:39 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Wrong as two boys in bed!!!

St. Lou Stu 05-05-2009 05:44 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Can someone Ban Dave? :r

replicant_argent 05-05-2009 06:34 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
I swear... the next guy that brings this thread back from the dead will be cursed by the nearest gypsy.. Now let it die before my wife sees it.




Dangit.

Barteur 05-05-2009 06:48 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
This message is for my wife

Stop reading
Forget about this... The cooler if for camping and the wooden box on the counter is furniture

Frenchie :r

Bruzee 05-05-2009 07:39 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Dave, you bored? I have one word for you my friend. Karma. :r Funny read, thanks.

ahc4353 05-05-2009 07:55 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by bobarian (Post 320533)
Dave, That is just wrong on so many levels! I like it!

In fact if any of you spurned wives or girlfriends come upon boxes like these, I am willing to pay over the $10 a cigar Dave mentioned! :tu

http://img21.imageshack.us/img21/927...ionsuprema.jpg http://img21.imageshack.us/img21/404...ityopennc8.jpg

I can pay $15 a cigar for these stinky old cigars. Just drop me a PM!:dance:

I actually got to hold those three lower boxes once. Really! All at the same time. A story that will be told down through the family generations.

karmaz00 05-06-2009 11:08 AM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
very wrong....lol

skullnrose 05-06-2009 11:18 AM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Move along nothing to see here

DonniePaul 09-03-2009 08:36 AM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
:r:r:r

14holestogie 09-03-2009 08:59 AM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by replicant_argent (Post 371005)
I swear... the next guy that brings this thread back from the dead will be cursed by the nearest gypsy.. Now let it die before my wife sees it.


Sorry, Donnie. ;)

BFallehy 09-03-2009 09:09 AM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Time to start locking the Humi. :r:r:r

Savor the Stick 01-23-2012 04:48 AM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
This Thread has slept quietly long enough. :lr:lr:lr

MrClean 01-23-2012 05:02 AM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
I have never seen it before, kindly bury back in the hole you found it K, and fill it with concrete. Here's hoping my wife NEVER lays eyes on this thread!!

Hem 01-23-2012 05:40 AM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
This is wrong on so many levels...

Taki 01-23-2012 05:53 AM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
:r:r I filed for divorce this morning just incase she would see this post!! :r:r


j/k I love my wife...

elderboy02 01-23-2012 06:31 AM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Oldie, but a goodie! :tu

Blak Smyth 01-23-2012 07:18 AM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Babe this applies to everybody else!

Ashcan Bill 01-23-2012 07:59 AM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
One of my favorite threads! It needs to pop up every so often. :D

mase 01-23-2012 04:37 PM

Re: Earn Money from your husbands cigar stash!
 
Funny thread.


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