Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum

Cigar Asylum Cigar Forum (http://www.cigarasylum.com/vb/index.php)
-   Jokes (http://www.cigarasylum.com/vb/forumdisplay.php?f=59)
-   -   Seven Degrees of Blonde (http://www.cigarasylum.com/vb/showthread.php?t=20912)

massphatness 09-03-2009 09:39 AM

Seven Degrees of Blonde
 
FIRST DEGREE
A married couple were asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning. The very blonde wife picked up the phone, listened a moment and said 'How should I know, that's 200 miles from here!' and hung up.

The husband said, 'Who was that?'

The wife answered, 'I don't know, some woman wanting to know if the coast is clear.'

SECOND DEGREE
Two blondes are walking down the street. One notices a compact on the sidewalk and leans down to pick it up. She opens it, looks in the mirror and says, 'Hmm, this person looks familiar.'

The second blonde says, 'Here, let me see!'

So, the first blonde hands her the compact.

The second blonde looks in the mirror and says, 'You dummy, it's me!'

THIRD DEGREE
A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the door she finds him in the arms of a redhead. Well, the blonde is really angry. She opens her purse to take out the gun, and as she does so, she is overcome with grief. She takes the gun and puts it to her head.

The boyfriend yells, 'No, honey, don't do it!!!'

The blonde replies, 'Shut up, you're next!'

FOURTH DEGREE
A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state capitals. She proudly says, 'Go ahead, ask me, .. I know 'em all.'

A friend says, 'OK, what's the capital of Wisconsin ?'

The blonde replies, 'Oh, that's easy . it's W.'

FIFTH DEGREE
Q: What did the blonde ask her doctor when he told her she was pregnant?
A: 'Is it mine?'

SIXTH DEGREE
Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA Freshman, sat in her US Government class The professor asked Bambi if she knew what Roe vs. Wade was about. Bambi pondered the question; then, finally, said, 'That was the decision George Washington had to make before he crossed the Delaware .'

SEVENTH DEGREE
Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized. She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime. The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio, and a K-9 unit, patrolling nearby, was the first to respond.

As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his dog, then sat down on the steps. Putting her face in her hands, she moaned, 'I come home to find all my possessions stolen. I call the police for help, and what do they do? They send me a BLIND policeman!'

MedicCook 09-03-2009 09:48 AM

Re: Seven Degrees of Blonde
 
:r

e-man67 09-03-2009 09:48 AM

Re: Seven Degrees of Blonde
 
Those are hilarious! :r

kelmac07 09-03-2009 10:18 AM

Re: Seven Degrees of Blonde
 
Good ones Vin!!! :tu

dunng 09-03-2009 10:23 AM

Re: Seven Degrees of Blonde
 
:r :r :r :r

Blindjimme 09-03-2009 10:30 AM

Re: Seven Degrees of Blonde
 
Funny stuff :tu

gorob23 09-03-2009 10:39 AM

Re: Seven Degrees of Blonde
 
Well Done!:banger

DoctorBJ 09-03-2009 10:40 AM

Re: Seven Degrees of Blonde
 
I shared with one of the blondes in the office. Even she laughed (after I explained them) :)

G G 09-03-2009 10:48 AM

Re: Seven Degrees of Blonde
 
Woohoo, very good Vin.:tu

Steve 09-03-2009 11:28 AM

Re: Seven Degrees of Blonde
 
:r:tu

Garbandz 09-03-2009 11:39 AM

Re: Seven Degrees of Blonde
 
8th degree of Blonde:I could tell my blonde secretary was having a bad day.She had a tampon behind one ear and could not find her pencil anywhere.....

Hendy 09-03-2009 11:44 AM

Re: Seven Degrees of Blonde
 
Very Nice.

So, 2 blondes walk into a building. You would think one of them would have seen it.

adampc22 09-03-2009 11:46 AM

Re: Seven Degrees of Blonde
 
lololololololol

Gophernut 09-03-2009 02:52 PM

Re: Seven Degrees of Blonde
 
Awesome ones there! Thanks for sharing.:r:r:r

Skywalker 09-03-2009 02:52 PM

Re: Seven Degrees of Blonde
 
I always enjoy a good Blonde joke or seven!!!

Thanks Vin!!!
:tu

DonniePaul 09-04-2009 07:33 AM

Re: Seven Degrees of Blonde
 
:r:r:r

Thanks for the Laughs!

Starscream 09-07-2009 07:03 PM

Re: Seven Degrees of Blonde
 
I really like the sixth degree!

Thanks Vin:tu

Kreth 09-07-2009 08:05 PM

Re: Seven Degrees of Blonde
 
A blonde gets pulled over for speeding by a blonde cop. The cop asks for the driver's license. "What's that?" asks the driver.
The cop says, "It's probably in you purse, and has your picture on it."
The driver fishes through her purse, finds a mirror, looks at it and hands it to the cop.
The cop takes a look and hands it back, saying, "You can go. I didn't realize you were a cop."
Posted via Mobile Device

DPD6030 09-07-2009 08:20 PM

Re: Seven Degrees of Blonde
 
Thanks for the laughs Vin and others :r

dubnick 09-07-2009 08:22 PM

Re: Seven Degrees of Blonde
 
Very Nice :rl :rl :rl


All times are GMT -6. The time now is 12:41 AM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.