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-   -   marine on a plane (http://www.cigarasylum.com/vb/showthread.php?t=65760)

pektel 03-07-2014 12:01 PM

marine on a plane
 
Two Radical Terrorists boarded a flight out of London.

One took a window seat and the other sat next to him in the middle seat.


Just before takeoff, a U.S. Marine sat down in the aisle seat.


After takeoff, the Marine kicked his shoes off, wiggled his toes and was settling in when the terrorist in the window seat said, 'I need to get up and get a coke.'

' Don't get up,' said the Marine, 'I'm in the aisle seat, I'll get it for you.'

As soon as he left, one of the terrorists picked up the Marine's shoe and spat in it.

When the Marine returned with the coke, the other terrorist said,
'That looks good, I'd really like one, too.'

Again, the Marine obligingly went to fetch it. While he was gone the other terrorist picked up the Marine's other shoe and spat in it.

When the Marine returned, they all sat back and enjoyed the flight.

As the plane was landing, the Marine slipped his feet into his shoes and knew immediately what had happened.

'Why does it have to be this way?' he asked.


'How long must this go on?

This fighting between our nations?

This hatred?

This animosity?

This spitting in shoes and

p i s s i n g in cokes ?'

THE FEW.
THE PROUD .
THE MARINES.

Porch Dweller 03-07-2014 12:02 PM

Re: marine on a plane
 
:D

dijit 03-07-2014 12:25 PM

Re: marine on a plane
 
Nothing beats the intuition of a seasoned soldier! :r:r

kelmac07 03-07-2014 12:41 PM

Re: marine on a plane
 
:r :r :r

CigarNut 03-07-2014 05:18 PM

Re: marine on a plane
 
:r :r

big_jaygee 03-07-2014 07:21 PM

Re: marine on a plane
 
:r :r :r

DirtRider500R 03-07-2014 08:32 PM

Re: marine on a plane
 
The Few
The Proud
The not-to-be-f***ed-with. :r

Ogre 03-08-2014 03:07 PM

Re: marine on a plane
 
:r:r:r:r:r

RUNYYFan 03-13-2014 12:19 PM

Re: marine on a plane
 
:r:r:r:r

Subvet642 03-13-2014 01:21 PM

Re: marine on a plane
 
It would take a Marine to fit his wiener in a tiny little Coke bottle spout. :r

Porch Dweller 03-13-2014 01:48 PM

Re: marine on a plane
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Subvet642 (Post 1943003)
It would take a Marine to fit his wiener in a tiny little Coke bottle spout. :r


http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/73...726827f702.jpg



I once almost got pummeled by three Marines in Stuttgart after I told them the only Marine joke I know:

Q: Why does the Navy keep Marines on their ships?

A: Because sheep would be too obvious.

Yeah, Marines don't enjoy non-Marines making jokes about them. :) A couple of rounds of beers settled everything down, though.

markem 03-13-2014 01:50 PM

Re: marine on a plane
 
An Army guy would not have left his shoes to be spit in.

Porch Dweller 03-13-2014 01:56 PM

Re: marine on a plane
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by markem (Post 1943014)
An Army guy would not have left his shoes to be spit in.

The only reason an Army guy would take his shoes off is if he needed to count to between 11 and 20.

:fu

:D

Blueface 03-13-2014 01:58 PM

Re: marine on a plane
 
:r

T.G 03-13-2014 03:06 PM

Re: marine on a plane
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Porch Dweller (Post 1943018)
The only reason an Army guy would take his shoes off is if he needed to count to between 11 and 20.

:fu

:D

Not sure I want to know what happens when they need to count to 21.

AdamJoshua 03-13-2014 03:15 PM

Re: marine on a plane
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Porch Dweller (Post 1943018)
The only reason an Army guy would take his shoes off is if he needed to count to between 11 and 20.

:fu

:D

This coming from someone in the Hair Force? :sl

AdamJoshua 03-13-2014 03:17 PM

Re: marine on a plane
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Porch Dweller (Post 1943013)
http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/73...726827f702.jpg



I once almost got pummeled by three Marines in Stuttgart after I told them the only Marine joke I know:

Q: Why does the Navy keep Marines on their ships?

A: Because sheep would be too obvious.

Yeah, Marines don't enjoy non-Marines making jokes about them. :) A couple of rounds of beers settled everything down, though.


Q: Why did the navy invent powered soap?

A: Takes long to pick it up when you drop it in the shower.


Q: What sound does sh!t make when it hits the fan?

A: Marrrrrrrrrriiiiiiiine

Subvet642 03-13-2014 03:25 PM

Re: marine on a plane
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Porch Dweller (Post 1943013)


I once almost got pummeled by three Marines in Stuttgart after I told them the only Marine joke I know:

Q: Why does the Navy keep Marines on their ships?

A: Because sheep would be too obvious.

Yeah, Marines don't enjoy non-Marines making jokes about them. :) A couple of rounds of beers settled everything down, though.

When I was in, the Marines hated our stinkin' guts because we were always screwing with them. It was mostly just us and them at Subase Groton; we'd get bored. Well, that and lots of free time and alcohol.

Porch Dweller 03-13-2014 03:31 PM

Re: marine on a plane
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by AdamJoshua (Post 1943031)
This coming from someone in the Hair Force? :sl

That's CHAIR Force to you, Mister. :D

jhedrick83 03-13-2014 04:37 PM

Re: marine on a plane
 
Some of the banter is just as funny as the joke!
:r

Subvet642 03-13-2014 05:57 PM

Re: marine on a plane
 
http://www.cigarasylum.com/vb/pictur...pictureid=3444

TNT009 03-13-2014 06:42 PM

Re: marine on a plane
 
Good one!!! An Army Ranger would have whooped their asses!


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