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Opening lines
Don posted an honest thread in the ladie's room about how to approach a woman, and had it
locked before I could respond, lol. And even though this thread could devolve into a 'joke' thread pretty easily, I would think it would be a much better use of our time if we helped the corpa masculina ( I made that up to sound latin) by telling the lines that ACTUALLY worked on women. I do not mind saying it, my best relationships with women have come to be through humor. They didn't last long, mine never do. But they had INTENSE starts and as a hideous man, I am lucky that I had such a hot streak in college. Cause it's sure over NOW. And I DID DJ in a popular nightclub back then, so women wanted me and didn't quite know why. Ahhhh. I hate being old. ANYWAY, I got well into the lacey underbelly of a young co-ed who worked in the information desk at the University of Southern Mississippi one semester by saying this" "Excuse me, i am sorry to bother you, but this IS the information desk?" "Yes." "Can you tell me the circumference of the Earth?" It was all horizontal from there. For 3 glorious weeks. Granted, I had to follow up with good chat, a little weed and the best oral sex she ever had, but that's how it started. |
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"You wanna fool around?" works pretty good.
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The one that always worked for me was..."Hey I'm Albert and you are?"
You may want to substitute your own name but hey do what ever you think will work |
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Hey, I'm Albert and you are....? :D
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"Excuse me but I seem to have lost the keys for my vintage 1973 AMC Gremlin. Would you have time to help me find them? I'll let you drive it."
MCS |
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Yo doll, I love your hair !
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Nce shoes, want to ........(insert your own vernacular):tu
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Smile, its the second best thing you can do with your lips!!!!
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-Some Random Chick |
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Posted via Mobile Device |
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Brad, in your case, I think the weed did it. :r
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"Hey babe, what's your sign?
I'm feces. My friends call me #2. I am sorry. That was very forward of me. I am very drunk. For all I know you are are freaking ugly." Love that line from comedian Bob Nelson. Classic! |
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to have that car today. It's the 66 Goat I REALLY miss, though. Now that I have mentioned it and broken the ice taboo, "Wanna get HIGH?" used to REALLY work back in the 80's and I hear it worked in the 70's too. I wouldn't know until 1979, however. And now I can't inhale anything. :( |
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You have to purify yourself in the waters of Lake Minnetonka.
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"Will you go to the Prom with me?" That's what worked for me a very long time ago. Haven't needed a pickup line since.;)
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"You know what would look good on you?....
...me." |
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Did you just fart?..............Because you blew me away.
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I have always gotten cute/sweet as opposed to hot/sexy so I have always tried to play it to my advantage.
"Hey, I know this is random and you don't know me, but I'd really like to know you." Insert appropriate emphasis on 'you' and I'm going to be honest, its a little corny, a lot embarrassing, but I haven't done too bad. ;) |
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My name is Inigo Montoya.
You killed my father. Prepare to die. If they know the movie, you are so in. Great conversation starter. |
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Two words: Flank Steak.
MCS |
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My buddy used the following at a bar one night....it worked! "So, how do you like your eggs in the morning? Scrambled...or fertilized?"
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Ron Burgundy: I wanna say something. I'm gonna put it out there; if you like it, you can take it, if you don't, send it right back. I want to be on you. [Veronica turns and walks away] Ron Burgundy: Wait. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I... I WANNA BE ON YOU. |
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I like your dress, but it would look better on my floor.
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HAHA! The thought of that worries me.
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Hey Angel drawers.
Tune in Tokyo. if your really desperate, just go up to every woman and ask, "Hey wanna sleep with me?" The law of probability is about 3/100. :r |
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Life's a *****, because if it was a slut it would be easy.
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http://www.cigarasylum.com/vb/showpo...1&postcount=24 |
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