Re: Everyday colloquialisms
 

Down in the dumps.

Re: Everyday colloquialisms
 

Thick as the hair on a hog's back.
Manners of a hyena.
Cute as a button.
Ray Charles could see that.
If it was a snake it would have bitten you.

Re: Everyday colloquialisms
 

I use this one all the time. Don't know where I picked it up...

Come hell or high water.

Re: Everyday colloquialisms
 

Slicker than snot on a door knob

Re: Everyday colloquialisms
 

Nervous as a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.
Colder than a witche's t*t in a brass bra.
It's raining like a cow p*ssing on a flat rock.
Hotter than a whore on dollar night.
Worthless as a poop flavored lollipop.
Dumber than a stump.
Nuttier than squirrel turds.

To list a few. I love this thread

Re: Everyday colloquialisms
 

More confused than a newborn in a topless bar.

$h!t or get off the pot.

You have to be 10% smarter than what you are working on.

Re: Everyday colloquialisms
 

Want in one hand and chit in the other and see which one fills up first.

Re: Everyday colloquialisms
 

Was (and is) one of my dad's favorites!

Re: Everyday colloquialisms
 

My first sargent walked past me and a buddy of mine coming into the chow hall and said
"It'd take a full house to beat THIS pair." I always thought that was the best freaking line.
The military seems to be the birthplace of the wildest ones.

Re: Everyday colloquialisms
 

Dense as pound cake.

Like fighting the Chinese army.

Hard as pushing chickens in a ditch.

Like a monkey peeing off a cliff...little bit go a long way.

Lower than whale $hit.

Went to $hit & the pigs ate ya.

Fell to the bottom of the pond & the catfish/carp ate ya.

Beat you like corndog batter/pancake batter/a rug.

Beat you til you smell like onions.

Re: Everyday colloquialisms
 

Sorry if these are repeats, I didn't read the entire thread:

You look like a bag of smashed a$$holes.

More frustrated than a moth in a light factory.

Re: Everyday colloquialisms
 

I got this one so many times from my Mother..."You'd better straighten up and fly right"

And my grandmother, never to be outdone, "There's two kinds of Smart: Smart and Smart Alec".

I was the second one every time that would be forced out of her mouth.

Re: Everyday colloquialisms
 

Nervous as a cat in a room full of rockers.

Re: Everyday colloquialisms
 

Re: Everyday colloquialisms
 

Got some appropriate ones:

Colder than a witches caress.
Colder than a landlords heart.
Colder than a room full of ex-wives.
Colder enough to freeze the nuts off the Guy Lombardi bridge.
Cold as a mother-in-law's kiss.
Colder than a welldigger's ass.

Re: Everyday colloquialisms
 

Old kitchen manager in a restaurant I used to work at used to say:

"Boy, you look like a 3 legged cat trying to bury turds on a frozen pond."

Re: Everyday colloquialisms
 

You better check yourself before you wreck yourself.

Standing out like a turd in the punch bowl.