I have a question maybe you can help me with

[tomc3084]

Okay, here is the scenario...You have a set of two very nice HTF cigars set aside for you and a buddy to smoke. The occasion arises and he then comes over to smoke. He brings some cigars with him. You give him the cigar to smoke, and you have one also, like I said. He then pulls out one of his cigars and says, "I am going to save this for a special occasion." Keep in mind this was not a "special occasion" but still, I consider it pretty damn special to be smoking this specific cigar, so I guess yes, it actually was a special occasion. To be specific, he said he was going to wait 'till Christmas to smoke it. I was very heated about this, but I did not speak up and say anything. Well, anyways, my question to you is: What do you think of the situation, and what would you have done about it? TIA.........
-Tommy

[Superbad]

I can understand your dismay. I know this is after the fact but I would have said I have been saving this for now, for the two of us to enjoy together. In the future, if you do hand him a non dog rocket ever again ;) clip the head and then hand it over, it will show him you want to smoke the cigars now.

[E.J.]

Man that is a tough one....

I would like to say that I would say nothing, smoke my cigar and enjoy the moment, hope that when he smokes the cigar I gave him, he enjoys the Hell out of it....

But if I want to smoke 2 HTF's with a friend....I would think that discussion of the smoke while we were doing it would be part of what I was looking for.... Who knows... Long story short, I would hope that I could just let it go and enjoy....

Consider it pretty cool that you provided him with a Christmas Smoke....;)

[68TriShield]

Next time I'd say make it clear you wanted to share the cigars now.
It will save you some aggravation.

[HK3-]

It happens. When you have your mind set on smoking a certain cigar and someone throws you a curve ball you tend to stick with what you had in mind from the get go. I agree with the above on clipping the head and then handing it over. This would suggest smoking it now vs. just smoke it when you want to. FWIW- I would have taken the hint and smoked it with you then. :tu

[poker]

I have been on both sides of the fence. If you give him a cigar, its really no longer yours to decide when he should light it.

If you gave it to him strictly to smoke right there and then, let him know that fact when you hand it to him.

Sometimes when I have a bunch of guys come over on the patio there have been times I been handed 12+ cigars. Its kind of hard to smoke all or even most of them so you understand when I say I been on both sides of the fence.

[CigarNut]

A little polite assertiveness goes a long way. If you bring a cigar for someone to smoke, you should let them know when you hand it to them: "I brought this for you to smoke with me tonight so we can compare notes" or something of the sort.

Having said that, be prepared for your buddy to have other priorities; don't get aggravated over the situation as you just ruin your own good-time.

[Mugen910]

Next time I'd say make it clear you wanted to share the cigars now.
It will save you some aggravation.

:tpd:

If he's your buddy then there should be no reason to tip toe around his feelings or yours.



Sometimes when I have a bunch of guys come over on the patio there have been times I been handed 12+ cigars. Its kind of hard to smoke all or even most of them so you understand when I say I been on both sides of the fence.

I swear I tried Kelly, you didn't want me to turn green! ;)

[pnoon]

A little polite assertiveness goes a long way. If you bring a cigar for someone to smoke, you should let them know when you hand it to them: "I brought this for you to smoke with me tonight so we can compare notes" or something of the sort.

Having said that, be prepared for your buddy to have other priorities; don't get aggravated over the situation as you just ruin your own good-time.

Bingo!

:tpd:

[Volt]

I have been on both sides of the fence. If you give him a cigar, its really no longer yours to decide when he should light it.

If you gave it to him strictly to smoke right there and then, let him know that fact when you hand it to him.

Sometimes when I have a bunch of guys come over on the patio there have been times I been handed 12+ cigars. Its kind of hard to smoke all or even most of them so you understand when I say I been on both sides of the fence.


I have to agree. Sounds like a minor communication issue. I just had this conversation with another person on a different topic. A little more clarity on your expectations might have kept you from being upset. Then again, other like me don't do subtle. I can't even spell it. Someone wants a specific smoke with me they better say, "hey, I brought these to burn tonight, lit it up :) " Especially if I shoqwed up with a particular stick for myself to burn.

[icehog3]

When you hand a friend a cigar, it is now theirs. They can do with it whatever they like. :2

[Emjaysmash]

I would've told him the purpose of those two HTFs. My friend and I actually talked about having a HTF smoke together for a special occasion, before we bought the smokes. Each of us has an identical Opus X from last year, we're saving for another couple of years. Even if I had been the one buying them, and storing them, I probably would've told him I had two cigars that I wanted to smoke together on a special occasion. Then we'd plan when the special occasion was. Like others have said, slight miscommunication. I wouldn't, however take the cigar back or anything if there was a miscommunication. Not much you can do once it's in his possesion.

[Col. Kurtz]

Kelly and Tom are dead on. You gave him the cigar. Ask him at New Years how it was.

[Brutus2600]

I think that at the time you could've just suggested "Oh, well I was hoping to smoke it with you tonight so that we could compare thoughts on it", you know, nothing that was overly pushy, just telling him what you meant to do with those cigars.

Now that it's after the fact...like others have said, not really any point in getting frustrated about it now or saying anything to him. Just know that you gifted a cigar to a BOTL and that when he lights it up Christmas he will think of your generosity and enjoy that cigar even more than he would if he had bought it himself.

[Patrick B]

I'm not very touchy feely so I would have said light it now or give it back!

[Stinky]

We all live and learn. Most all of us have been in that same situation. The good advice shared above is "experience talking". You'll do better next time! Good subject.

[cjfeola]

Okay, here is the scenario...You have a set of two very nice HTF cigars set aside for you and a buddy to smoke. The occasion arises and he then comes over to smoke. He brings some cigars with him. You give him the cigar to smoke, and you have one also, like I said. He then pulls out one of his cigars and says, "I am going to save this for a special occasion." Keep in mind this was not a "special occasion" but still, I consider it pretty damn special to be smoking this specific cigar, so I guess yes, it actually was a special occasion. To be specific, he said he was going to wait 'till Christmas to smoke it. I was very heated about this, but I did not speak up and say anything. Well, anyways, my question to you is: What do you think of the situation, and what would you have done about it? TIA.........
-Tommy

If the guy is a buddy, give him the benefit of the doubt. I tend to prefer strong, heavy cigars, but every once in a while I have some bad sushi for lunch or something and I'm not up to it. Maybe he wasn't feeling up to anything but an old reliable-what do you think?

cjf

[rizzle]

Absolutely nothing. I would have taken it as a compliment that he thought enough of my gift to warrant saving it for a "special occassion".

[stearns]

just preface the handing of the cigar with an 'ive been saving these to smoke together, lets light them up!' that should solve any communication issues

stearns

[mosesbotbol]

Good responses so far. Who smokes just one cigar? Have him smoke it as number 2 or 3. We have all been there when someone hands us a cigar we did not or wasn't prepared to smoke.

[whodeeni]

I think that at the time you could've just suggested "Oh, well I was hoping to smoke it with you tonight so that we could compare thoughts on it", you know, nothing that was overly pushy, just telling him what you meant to do with those cigars.

Now that it's after the fact...like others have said, not really any point in getting frustrated about it now or saying anything to him. Just know that you gifted a cigar to a BOTL and that when he lights it up Christmas he will think of your generosity and enjoy that cigar even more than he would if he had bought it himself.

:tpd::tu

[shilala]

I've never had that happen, but I'm usually pretty clear. If I invite a bud for a smoke, he or she knows what we're gonna smoke cause I'll say so. Or I'll say "I have a couple real special cigars for us", so they know the intent.
Conversely, I've been offered very special cigars that I've tried before, know I don't like, and I'll decline, very graciously. I'll just let them know it's wasted on me, but thank you very much.
Usually I'll drag out a bunch of stuff and say here, you need to try this. And this. And this... :)
I hate picking out cigars, cause I can never make a decision, so I like to send someone else in to pick us cigars. That's easier. I don't have any "special occasion" cigars anymore, cause every single day is a special occasion. So whatever they pick is special, because I know they're going to enjoy it, and they're going to be happy they picked something I'll enjoy.

[Blueface]

I can understand your dismay. I know this is after the fact but I would have said I have been saving this for now, for the two of us to enjoy together. In the future, if you do hand him a non dog rocket ever again ;) clip the head and then hand it over, it will show him you want to smoke the cigars now.

Next time I'd say make it clear you wanted to share the cigars now.
It will save you some aggravation.

:tpd:

I have to say I have been handed some extremely, incredibly rare, fine cigars and I have not always smoked them right then and there. In fact, I still have a few that came that way.

I would expect my friend to tell me he wants me to enjoy that with him now and after I hear that then absolutely I would not hesitate to light it up and appease him.