CBI_2
11-02-2009, 09:29 PM
Found this list on a local radio station's site and thought I would share.
50.Al Roker
I would have put him higher on the list, but he gave up on us fat guys and got skinny.
That, to be honest, is disrespectful.
49.Oliver Hardy
This guy knew that fat guys were much funnier than skinny guys a long time before other people did. And without him, you wouldn't see a lot of the guys on this list.
48.Danny DeVito
Not only is he one of the greatest fat guys ever, he may also appear on a "Best Incredibly Short Men Ever" list in the future.
47.Fatty Arbuckle
The picture is reason enough to honor him with a place in fat guy history.
http://i306.photobucket.com/albums/nn264/cigarshirts/FattyArbuckle.jpg
His name also qualifies him immediately.
46.Shaquille O'Neal
Yeah, yeah, you are probably saying that he is not actually fat. However, according to the World Health Organization, his body mass index would classify him as obese.
45.The Fat Munchkin
This guy knew how to lead.
And you know that the Lollipop Guild was constantly trying to backstab him and take the power.
44.Chester A. Arthur
This guy had the best set of mutton chops in his day, possibly in history.
Speaking of that, a diet heavy in mutton is a great way to get on this list.
43.The Fat Man
Jake was good enough to have his named mentioned in the title. The fat guy was simply referred to by his stature. But I don't think that William Conrad minded very much.
42.Luciano Pavarotti
Some of the best singers tend to be rather large, and this guy was certainly one of the best.
I can't even imagine what dinner was like at his house.
41.Meatloaf
His name is Meatloaf.
Isn't that enough?
40.Eric Cartman
I am not a fan of South Park, but I have to tip my hat to this kid. He makes a lot of people laugh, and he is not afraid to say things that are offensive.
39.Orson Welles
If you were alive in the 20th century, you have heard this guy's larger-than-life voice. Sadly, he is one of the many on this list who had their life shortened by being such awesome fat guys.
38.John Candy
Perhaps the funniest Canadian ever to live, and certainly one of the largest.
Again, another entry on the list whose name has something to do with the problem of weight. Get it? Candy?
37.Drew Carey
Yep, you knew that there was going to be some sort of Cleveland or Ohio connection on the list.
Here you go.
36.Burl Ives
I just love this picture.
http://i306.photobucket.com/albums/nn264/cigarshirts/BurlIves.jpg
He looks just like a really big, really hairy baby.
35.Marlon Brando
What's amazing about this guy is that he went from the muscle bound Stanley in "Streetcar Named Desire" to being the uncomfortably large man with a crush on Larry King.
34.The Notorious B.I.G.
I know better than to get those East Coast rappers mad at me, so he has a space on the list.
There aren't many people I am more scared of than rappers with guns.
33.Tony Soprano
Members of the Mafia with guns would be one of the groups that frightens me more than the rappers.
32.James Belushi
Here's an example of an awesome trend. Throughout TV history, fat guys on TV have had insanely beautiful wives. This is just another example of why being fat is so beneficial.
31.John Belushi
This guy didn't a trophy wife to be awesome.
The food fight scene in "Animal House" certainly didn't hurt.
30.Jon Brower Minnoch
Jon Brower Minnoch (1941-1983) was the heaviest man recorded in history. At his peak weight, he was approximately 1400 lb. This is what we all shoot for, and fall short of.
29.Benjamin Franklin
He didn't let his weight get in the way of fathering our nation.
And I really like when I have pictures of him in my wallet.
28.Lou Costello
He is one of my favorite comedians ever.
That's not because he was pudgy, although that certainly didn't hurt his success.
27.Dom DeLuise
Without him, there is no "Cannonball Run."
Even worse, there's no "Cannonball Run II".
26.Dennis Franz
No matter what happens in my life, I never want to do something bad enough that Sipowicz would come and arrest me.
He would probably call me a bad word.
25.George Wendt
NORM!!!
Who hasn't been at the bar and seen some dude just like him? Heck, I have BEEN that guy at the bar.
24.John Goodman
This is the kind of guy you would just want to hang out with.
If you have seen "The Big Lebowski", you might not want to bowl with him.
23.W.C. Fields
His comic characters are pretty much the same people that we would want to be... if there were no such thing as jobs and responsibilities.
22.Brian Dennehy
I think he has played in almost every Lifetime movie ever made, which hurts his stock, but he was Chris Farley's dad in "Tommy Boy", and that rockets him up the list.
21.Raymond Burr
This one is interesting because he played the same character, at one point skinny, and later quite large.
Of course, I found the fat character more likable and believable.
20.Teddy Roosevelt
It isn't often that young Presidents come on the scene and change the way that we look at the Oval Office. And he was able to stay true to his values without leaving a stain on the position.
19.Bill Clinton
He did leave a stain.
18.Homer Simpson
He's lovable, he takes care of his family, and he once sat at the kitchen table and ate 64 slices of American cheese.
That's an accomplishment to be celebrated.
17.Winston Churchill
Without this guy, we may not have survived WWII.
Without this guy, fish and chips vendors in England may have gone hungry.
16.Alfred Hitchcock
In my opinion, the greatest director in cinema history.
I am not saying that it had anything to do with his girth, but it obviously didn't hurt.
15.Jackie Gleason
He was Homer Simpson long before Homer Simpson was even thought of.
But I am not sure that he ever pulled off that cheese thing.
14.The Fat Motorcycle Twins
The McGuire twins were born Billy Leon and Benny Loyd McCrary, and were listed in the Guinness Book of World Records as the "World's Heaviest Twins". The famous Guinness photo depicts the twins riding their Honda motorcycles.
13.Fat Elvis
If you haven't seen him singing "Unchained Melody" 6 weeks before his death, then you haven't seen the soul that those few extra pounds gave him later in life. As a matter of fact, I am going to go watch the clip now.
12.Fat Albert
In 2002, Fat Albert was placed at number 12 on TV Guide's list of the 50 Greatest Cartoon Characters of All Time.
Is this a coincidence?
11.John Madden
I don't know what he is saying a lot of the time on NFL broadcasts, but I know that he has experience in the trenches.
And he is still at his playing weight.
10.Chris Farley
He is another one that we lost too early, but it was probably due more to the cocaine and heroin than his weight. The worst part about it was the thought that being fat was the only reason that people thought he was funny. No way.
9.Buddha
People still follow this guy's teachings.
That's right, they follow the fat guy.
8.Louis Armstrong
Satchmo could blow!
Have you noticed all of the amazing musicians on this list? That can't be a coincidence.
7.Andre The Giant
This guy is a hero based on some of the rumors about his ability to put away food and alcohol. They said he could drink 2 bottles of hard liquor, 30 beers and only be buzzed.
6.Fred Flintstone
We are getting toward the end of the list, and I am starting to get tired (possibly because I am overweight).
Fred's hammock looks REALLY good.
5.John Popper
A lot of you may be thinking that some dude who just plays the harmonica, and who had that skinny surgery, does not belong on the list.
You must not have heard him play.
4.Jabba the Hut
Sure, he was evil, but in a weird way, he was really cool too.
Kind of like an outer-space pimp.
3.Babe Ruth
He was probably the best baseball player ever, and his training consisted of hot dogs and beer.
That's our kind of guy!
2.William Howard Taft
This dude was so large that he actually got stuck in the White House bathtub. Instead of taking that as a sign to lose weight, he just built a new one... big enough for FOUR men to fit in. Awesome.
1.Santa Claus
This guy finds the time every year to bring us stuff that we need and want. How often do we thank him?
Not enough, and this is just my tiny way of getting in good with the guy.
50.Al Roker
I would have put him higher on the list, but he gave up on us fat guys and got skinny.
That, to be honest, is disrespectful.
49.Oliver Hardy
This guy knew that fat guys were much funnier than skinny guys a long time before other people did. And without him, you wouldn't see a lot of the guys on this list.
48.Danny DeVito
Not only is he one of the greatest fat guys ever, he may also appear on a "Best Incredibly Short Men Ever" list in the future.
47.Fatty Arbuckle
The picture is reason enough to honor him with a place in fat guy history.
http://i306.photobucket.com/albums/nn264/cigarshirts/FattyArbuckle.jpg
His name also qualifies him immediately.
46.Shaquille O'Neal
Yeah, yeah, you are probably saying that he is not actually fat. However, according to the World Health Organization, his body mass index would classify him as obese.
45.The Fat Munchkin
This guy knew how to lead.
And you know that the Lollipop Guild was constantly trying to backstab him and take the power.
44.Chester A. Arthur
This guy had the best set of mutton chops in his day, possibly in history.
Speaking of that, a diet heavy in mutton is a great way to get on this list.
43.The Fat Man
Jake was good enough to have his named mentioned in the title. The fat guy was simply referred to by his stature. But I don't think that William Conrad minded very much.
42.Luciano Pavarotti
Some of the best singers tend to be rather large, and this guy was certainly one of the best.
I can't even imagine what dinner was like at his house.
41.Meatloaf
His name is Meatloaf.
Isn't that enough?
40.Eric Cartman
I am not a fan of South Park, but I have to tip my hat to this kid. He makes a lot of people laugh, and he is not afraid to say things that are offensive.
39.Orson Welles
If you were alive in the 20th century, you have heard this guy's larger-than-life voice. Sadly, he is one of the many on this list who had their life shortened by being such awesome fat guys.
38.John Candy
Perhaps the funniest Canadian ever to live, and certainly one of the largest.
Again, another entry on the list whose name has something to do with the problem of weight. Get it? Candy?
37.Drew Carey
Yep, you knew that there was going to be some sort of Cleveland or Ohio connection on the list.
Here you go.
36.Burl Ives
I just love this picture.
http://i306.photobucket.com/albums/nn264/cigarshirts/BurlIves.jpg
He looks just like a really big, really hairy baby.
35.Marlon Brando
What's amazing about this guy is that he went from the muscle bound Stanley in "Streetcar Named Desire" to being the uncomfortably large man with a crush on Larry King.
34.The Notorious B.I.G.
I know better than to get those East Coast rappers mad at me, so he has a space on the list.
There aren't many people I am more scared of than rappers with guns.
33.Tony Soprano
Members of the Mafia with guns would be one of the groups that frightens me more than the rappers.
32.James Belushi
Here's an example of an awesome trend. Throughout TV history, fat guys on TV have had insanely beautiful wives. This is just another example of why being fat is so beneficial.
31.John Belushi
This guy didn't a trophy wife to be awesome.
The food fight scene in "Animal House" certainly didn't hurt.
30.Jon Brower Minnoch
Jon Brower Minnoch (1941-1983) was the heaviest man recorded in history. At his peak weight, he was approximately 1400 lb. This is what we all shoot for, and fall short of.
29.Benjamin Franklin
He didn't let his weight get in the way of fathering our nation.
And I really like when I have pictures of him in my wallet.
28.Lou Costello
He is one of my favorite comedians ever.
That's not because he was pudgy, although that certainly didn't hurt his success.
27.Dom DeLuise
Without him, there is no "Cannonball Run."
Even worse, there's no "Cannonball Run II".
26.Dennis Franz
No matter what happens in my life, I never want to do something bad enough that Sipowicz would come and arrest me.
He would probably call me a bad word.
25.George Wendt
NORM!!!
Who hasn't been at the bar and seen some dude just like him? Heck, I have BEEN that guy at the bar.
24.John Goodman
This is the kind of guy you would just want to hang out with.
If you have seen "The Big Lebowski", you might not want to bowl with him.
23.W.C. Fields
His comic characters are pretty much the same people that we would want to be... if there were no such thing as jobs and responsibilities.
22.Brian Dennehy
I think he has played in almost every Lifetime movie ever made, which hurts his stock, but he was Chris Farley's dad in "Tommy Boy", and that rockets him up the list.
21.Raymond Burr
This one is interesting because he played the same character, at one point skinny, and later quite large.
Of course, I found the fat character more likable and believable.
20.Teddy Roosevelt
It isn't often that young Presidents come on the scene and change the way that we look at the Oval Office. And he was able to stay true to his values without leaving a stain on the position.
19.Bill Clinton
He did leave a stain.
18.Homer Simpson
He's lovable, he takes care of his family, and he once sat at the kitchen table and ate 64 slices of American cheese.
That's an accomplishment to be celebrated.
17.Winston Churchill
Without this guy, we may not have survived WWII.
Without this guy, fish and chips vendors in England may have gone hungry.
16.Alfred Hitchcock
In my opinion, the greatest director in cinema history.
I am not saying that it had anything to do with his girth, but it obviously didn't hurt.
15.Jackie Gleason
He was Homer Simpson long before Homer Simpson was even thought of.
But I am not sure that he ever pulled off that cheese thing.
14.The Fat Motorcycle Twins
The McGuire twins were born Billy Leon and Benny Loyd McCrary, and were listed in the Guinness Book of World Records as the "World's Heaviest Twins". The famous Guinness photo depicts the twins riding their Honda motorcycles.
13.Fat Elvis
If you haven't seen him singing "Unchained Melody" 6 weeks before his death, then you haven't seen the soul that those few extra pounds gave him later in life. As a matter of fact, I am going to go watch the clip now.
12.Fat Albert
In 2002, Fat Albert was placed at number 12 on TV Guide's list of the 50 Greatest Cartoon Characters of All Time.
Is this a coincidence?
11.John Madden
I don't know what he is saying a lot of the time on NFL broadcasts, but I know that he has experience in the trenches.
And he is still at his playing weight.
10.Chris Farley
He is another one that we lost too early, but it was probably due more to the cocaine and heroin than his weight. The worst part about it was the thought that being fat was the only reason that people thought he was funny. No way.
9.Buddha
People still follow this guy's teachings.
That's right, they follow the fat guy.
8.Louis Armstrong
Satchmo could blow!
Have you noticed all of the amazing musicians on this list? That can't be a coincidence.
7.Andre The Giant
This guy is a hero based on some of the rumors about his ability to put away food and alcohol. They said he could drink 2 bottles of hard liquor, 30 beers and only be buzzed.
6.Fred Flintstone
We are getting toward the end of the list, and I am starting to get tired (possibly because I am overweight).
Fred's hammock looks REALLY good.
5.John Popper
A lot of you may be thinking that some dude who just plays the harmonica, and who had that skinny surgery, does not belong on the list.
You must not have heard him play.
4.Jabba the Hut
Sure, he was evil, but in a weird way, he was really cool too.
Kind of like an outer-space pimp.
3.Babe Ruth
He was probably the best baseball player ever, and his training consisted of hot dogs and beer.
That's our kind of guy!
2.William Howard Taft
This dude was so large that he actually got stuck in the White House bathtub. Instead of taking that as a sign to lose weight, he just built a new one... big enough for FOUR men to fit in. Awesome.
1.Santa Claus
This guy finds the time every year to bring us stuff that we need and want. How often do we thank him?
Not enough, and this is just my tiny way of getting in good with the guy.