Smell of smoking

[jerseystepup]

ok.. now im not allowed to smoke in my house.. (im whipped i know).. Now the womans in VA until tuesday... Being the total child that i am.. i really wanna watch the new simpsons and family guy tonight while enjoying a stick... Think its doable without getting caught? How bad do you think one cigar will stink up everything in my house? She does burn incense so i can use that as a buffer.

[icehog3]

Go for it!!! :tu

[Smokin Gator]

You'll probably get busted but I would for sure do it!!!

[dunng]

Go for it... get a fan and open the window! :ss

[captain53]

Time to Man-Up!:gl

[markem]

fabreze

[Catfish]

If she's not a smoker, yer busted soon as she walks in.

[jerseystepup]

HAha how did i know everyone would tell me to do it... i of course know what all you brothers think i should do... ill most likely get caught huh? haha

[icehog3]

You gotta do it! :tu

[T.G]

Go for it, just air the place out afterwards.

If you think you are going to get caught, wait untill a few hours before she gets back and put something on the stove / in the oven and burn the crap out of it. Just incenerate the damn thing. Something like an entire bulb of chopped garlic (not a clove, an entire bulb) fryed in oil unitl it all burns, then, burn the oil too. Maybe even toss in a few dried jalopone chilies. Tell her you were trying to make chinese food, but you messed up. Or burn a pot full of cheap spaghetti sauce from the $1 store, maybe a few slices of toast too.

[Catfish]

Go for it, just air the place out afterwards.

If you think you are going to get caught, wait untill a few hours before she gets back and put something on the stove / in the oven and burn the crap out of it. Just incenerate the damn thing. Something like an entire bulb of chopped garlic (not a clove, an entire bulb) fryed in oil unitl it all burns, then, burn the oil too. Maybe even toss in a few dried jalopone chilies. Tell her you were trying to make chinese food, but you messed up. Or burn a pot full of cheap spaghetti sauce from the $1 store, maybe a few slices of toast too.

:r:r:r:r:

[bonjing]

sounds like you've done this before?

Go for it, just air the place out afterwards.

If you think you are going to get caught, wait untill a few hours before she gets back and put something on the stove / in the oven and burn the crap out of it. Just incenerate the damn thing. Something like an entire bulb of chopped garlic (not a clove, an entire bulb) fryed in oil unitl it all burns, then, burn the oil too. Maybe even toss in a few dried jalopone chilies. Tell her you were trying to make chinese food, but you messed up. Or burn a pot full of cheap spaghetti sauce from the $1 store, maybe a few slices of toast too.

[T.G]

sounds like you've done this before?

Moi? http://planetsmilies.net/angel-smiley-5108.gif

[jerseystepup]

hahaha... wow im at a loss for words now.. haha

[icehog3]

hahaha... wow im at a loss for words now.. haha

Better start smokin'... ;)

[jerseystepup]

Im going to order chinese for dinner in a bit... on the way home pick up a 6 pack of sierra nevada torpedo... then figure out something small to smoke after dinner... maybe a verocu #9, or a DPG 1979 pc... hmmm now.. next order of business.. what should i order from the china man? Im thinking general tso's extra spicy

[TheTraveler]

Im going to order chinese for dinner in a bit... on the way home pick up a 6 pack of sierra nevada torpedo... then figure out something small to smoke after dinner... maybe a verocu #9, or a DPG 1979 pc... hmmm now.. next order of business.. what should i order from the china man? Im thinking general tso's extra spicy

I second the General Tso's ! :tu :tu

As for the smoking I say this: smoke the cigar and air the house out, then when she walks in the door say "Hey baby, I missed you. Oh, and I smoked in the house while you were gone. See, it doesn't smell as bad as we feared it would since I aired the place out for an hour. I think I'll smoke outside like normal except on game days. During the game I'll be smoking in my recliner." Then give her a kiss, a smack on the backside, and say "Oh, while you're in the kitchen will you grab me a beer please? Thanks."



:D

[Starscream]

fabreze
:tpd:
Use this while you are smoking, immediately after, and a couple of times before she gets back home.

[Red]

so you wife will let you poop in the house but now smoke...man...what has this world come too :)

[Pilon]

Klipsch (Walt) uses an ozone machine in his apartment that cleans the air. He used it while smoking and lets in run for a while after finished. Leaves a smell of iron after but eliminates most of the odor. Not sure how much one costs.

[dogface_313]

I want to smoke in my place as well, Fiancee and future in-laws are coming down this Thursday though.

[jerseystepup]

Well... Im doing it.. so you better.. dont leave me all alone on this one!

[elderboy02]

Fry some bacon before she comes home :tu

[bonjing]

Well... Im doing it.. so you better.. dont leave me all alone on this one!

you better post after action reports. :D

[King James]

If you air out the place and maybe spray some febreeze or use the incense it should be fine by Tuesday. Or if you have a air purifier or something that would help alot too. Maybe try to open a window and point a fan in the direction of that window during the cigar and it will flush some of the smoke out right away so it doesn't linger.




And I vote General Tso's as well

[jerseystepup]

you better post after action reports. :D


Or after pictures of the bruises... i already used our credit card yesterday to relieve my local B&M of their last few opus (i was told NO cigar purchases while she was gone) might as well go all out..

how stupid is it that im really excited right now.. haha

[dogface_313]

I hope you enjoy that cigar. If your going to do it, smoke something good, and make sure it is big.

[Bubba - NJ]

I second the General Tso's ! :tu :tu

As for the smoking I say this: smoke the cigar and air the house out, then when she walks in the door say "Hey baby, I missed you. Oh, and I smoked in the house while you were gone. See, it doesn't smell as bad as we feared it would since I aired the place out for an hour. I think I'll smoke outside like normal except on game days. During the game I'll be smoking in my recliner." Then give her a kiss, a smack on the backside, and say "Oh, while you're in the kitchen will you grab me a beer please? Thanks."



:D

Go for it, just air the place out afterwards.

If you think you are going to get caught, wait untill a few hours before she gets back and put something on the stove / in the oven and burn the crap out of it. Just incenerate the damn thing. Something like an entire bulb of chopped garlic (not a clove, an entire bulb) fryed in oil unitl it all burns, then, burn the oil too. Maybe even toss in a few dried jalopone chilies. Tell her you were trying to make chinese food, but you messed up. Or burn a pot full of cheap spaghetti sauce from the $1 store, maybe a few slices of toast too.

:r

[MrOneEyedBoh]

Just do it and make one of these. Get a toilet paper roll and put dryer sheets over one end and hold them with a rubberband. Then when you exhale blow it thru the open end and it will come out the end with the dryer sheets to hide the smell. It does work, but yes I'm kidding haha.

Have fun man. Febreze and fans

[Starscream]

Fry some bacon before she comes home :tu

Or cook some collards. That smell will overpower any other smell in the house.

[T.G]

Just do it and make one of these. Get a toilet paper roll and put dryer sheets over one end and hold them with a rubberband. Then when you exhale blow it thru the open end and it will come out the end with the dryer sheets to hide the smell. It does work, but yes I'm kidding haha.

Have fun man. Febreze and fans

Do I really want to know what you were actually smoking to come up with something like that?

[troutbreath]

Wow. I wish I had this thread on Friday. I caught some grief because of the smell of smoke in the house after my office day . . . and I had been smoking OUTSIDE. I think my wife is part bloodhound.

[jerseystepup]

This is great.. i went with an El rey de los habanos robusto... so good but ummm it effin smellllllsss and is smokeeeeey in here fck it right?

[captain53]

This is great.. i went with an El rey de los habanos robusto... so good but ummm it effin smellllllsss and is smokeeeeey in here fck it right?

Right Brother - :<

[MrOneEyedBoh]

Do I really want to know what you were actually smoking to come up with something like that?

No I was just saying. :tf And its an old easy method. I've read about it all over the net and heard it from friends.

[Jimbo14]

Well... Im doing it.. so you better.. dont leave me all alone on this one!

Haha good on you Randy. Your going to get busted though. My girlfriend hates me smoking and can pick up the scent a mile away.

Women you can't live with them, you can't live without them...

[timo]

Just say what my son always says, "it wasn't me"

[GTCanuk]

Just open the windows and have a fan blow out 1, then fabreze:banger

[MrOneEyedBoh]

Just say what my son always says, "it wasn't me"

Or the devil made me do it

[skullnrose]

Tell her you smoked outside and left the door or the windows open and the smoke musta blowin in.

[HK3-]

Oh man you are so busted! The house is going to wreek.....

When she walks in the house on Tuesday... :su "W-T-F is that smell?"

[MajorCaptSilly]

Every time I've done it, I got caught. I really think it was worth it.


MCS

[Jimbo14]

Every time I've done it, I got caught. I really think it was worth it.


MCS


Haha, a true cigar smoker. I love it!

[jerseystepup]

Hmm.. well the house wreakksss... and im wasted..

so worth it.... im actually staring at my humi from accross the room... hmmmmm

[JJG]

Don't worry, you wont get busted. I light a candle and chain smoke several cigars in the living room both Fri. and Saturday nights after the lady goes to bed. She has never said anything about the smell the next morning.

[jerseystepup]

i can assure you she knows lol

[kzm007]

lol they ALL know, man. It's a conspiracy!

:ss

[icehog3]

You're in so much trouble when your wife gets home. ;) :r

[Skywalker]

Nice knowing you!!!:r

What's that??? Your a$$ is grass???:D

[jerseystepup]

You're in so much trouble when your wife gets home. ;) :r

hahaha.... coming from one of the botl's that convinced me to do it!!! ill remember this! :tu

[JJG]

haha maybe you're right and she doesn't say anything because she feels guilty. I bust her smoking pot all time. It doesn't bother me, but I'll come home and be like "whew baby! it stinks in here! are you high?" (cue sh*t-eating grin)

[duckmanco]

I bet a setup that might work, and one I would love to try would be to set a box fan in a window with the airflow blowing out and blow the smoke into the window opening.... it would probably suck all or most of it right out...

[itsme_timd]

Go for it!!!

You gotta do it!

Better start smokin'...

You're in so much trouble when your wife gets home.

ROFLMAO!!!!! :r :r :r

[yourchoice]

You're in so much trouble when your wife gets home. ;) :r

Literally ----> lol :r

[bookman]

cover the furniture with a sheet and spray some unscented Ozium. You should be fine.

[leasingthisspace]

I am pretty sure my wife would smell it before she got in the house. She would just know.
Posted via Mobile Device

[DPD6030]

Do it :tu

[slickster81]

I second the General Tso's ! :tu :tu

As for the smoking I say this: smoke the cigar and air the house out, then when she walks in the door say "Hey baby, I missed you. Oh, and I smoked in the house while you were gone. See, it doesn't smell as bad as we feared it would since I aired the place out for an hour. I think I'll smoke outside like normal except on game days. During the game I'll be smoking in my recliner." Then give her a kiss, a smack on the backside, and say "Oh, while you're in the kitchen will you grab me a beer please? Thanks."



:D

What are we smokin' at his funeral? I want to be prepared :ss

[Jimbo14]

So whats the story. Did you get busted?

[TheTraveler]

What are we smokin' at his funeral? I want to be prepared :ss

My theory is you always aim for more than you actually want. That way after negotiations you end up with exactly what you wanted instead of less!

:D

[dogface_313]

My theory is you always aim for more than you actually want. That way after negotiations you end up with exactly what you wanted instead of less!

:D

My logic as well.

[ade06]

This thread is too funny. Please take picture of your wife's reaction upon coming home. Lol.

[jerseystepup]

shes not home till tomorow... yea the house stinksss haha o well... and it looks like im going to have a package meet her at the door so shell be double pissed

[ade06]

shes not home till tomorow... yea the house stinksss haha o well... and it looks like im going to have a package meet her at the door so shell be double pissed

Make sure you have some flowers delivered with your cigars (or have some placed in a vase). :tu

[dogface_313]

Sounds like you are busted to me. Air the house out, spray all furniture with Febreeze, make tacos right before she gets home.

[CigarDisciple]

I'm with T.G. Burn some food in the kitchen, That's the ticket. :r:r:r:tu

[icehog3]

I'm with T.G. Burn some food in the kitchen, That's the ticket. :r:r:r:tu

Or adopt a couple dozen stray cats tonight. ;)

[GKitty]

:r :r :r

Yeah, it's a conspiracy.... and I'm telling!!! :D

You've already said she burns incense. Burn some before she gets home. (Tip: Not her favorite. She's more likely to notice something "wrong" with a scent she's familiar with.) IF she picks up on lingering cigar, come clean. If she doesn't, well..... do that happy dance somewhere private. :D

[e-man67]

shes not home till tomorow... yea the house stinksss haha o well... and it looks like im going to have a package meet her at the door so shell be double pissed


This thread is so damn funny! My wife too hates the smell of smoke...I wouldn't dare smoke in the house...you are too brave...of course you are gonna have blueballs for the next week b/c more than likely you aren't gettin any! :r

Oh, idea! you could burn some limburger cheese on the stove...that might cover the cigar stench up...on second thought no it won't your screwed! :r

[GTCanuk]

You could always get a pet skunk:r

[Kreth]

Oh fer chrissakes, man up and tell your woman that you're gonna smoke where and when you damn well feel like it.

EDIT: Mods, please delete this in case my wife reads the forum.
Posted via Mobile Device

[Red]

Break your arm or something so you can go to the hospital, if your hospitalized she want be mad. Tell her you where smoking outside...and you fell out of your chair and you had to crawl inside to get the phone and dial 911...meanwhile your cigar was hanging out of your mouth and you where in so much pain you didn't think about it when you brought it inside.

[Skywalker]

Oh fer chrissakes, man up and tell your woman that you're gonna smoke where and when you damn well feel like it.

EDIT: Mods, please delete this in case my wife reads the forum.
Posted via Mobile Device

Break your arm or something so you can go to the hospital, if your hospitalized she want be mad. Tell her you where smoking outside...and you fell out of your chair and you had to crawl inside to get the phone and dial 911...meanwhile your cigar was hanging out of your mouth and you where in so much pain you didn't think about it when you brought it inside.

:r:r:r

Both of these are possible... just improbable!!!

[longknocker]

ok.. now im not allowed to smoke in my house.. (im whipped i know).. Now the womans in VA until tuesday... Being the total child that i am.. i really wanna watch the new simpsons and family guy tonight while enjoying a stick... Think its doable without getting caught? How bad do you think one cigar will stink up everything in my house? She does burn incense so i can use that as a buffer.

NO WAYYYYYY! You'll Get Busted! Just Ask David, i.e. (smitdavi).:)

[longknocker]

Oh fer chrissakes, man up and tell your woman that you're gonna smoke where and when you damn well feel like it.

EDIT: Mods, please delete this in case my wife reads the forum.
Posted via Mobile Device

I was going to say, "How Long Have You Been Married"?:r:tu

[GreekGodX]

It's D-Day :D I'd go with Gkitty's advice. In this situation you need to go with a woman's advice.

If you won't listen to her, listen to me. Don't do anything about the smell and tell her that you are smoking in the house whenever you G.D feel like it.

[icehog3]

NO WAYYYYYY! You'll Get Busted! Just Ask David, i.e. (smitdavi).:)

Too late. ;)

[CigarDisciple]

Just thought about something, if she makes more money than you, fess up, tell her it will never happen again. If you make more than her, tell her your the man of the house and you'll smoke wherever and whenever you want to and then run like hell LOL :r:r:ss

[jerseystepup]

Well... needles to say i got home today an hour before she did and the house smelled fine... we had alot of rain last night and i gues the cross winds + open windows + incense, cleared everything out... Just finished the steak and potatoes SHE COOKED.. (she felt bad for leaving me to fend for myself... and im enjoying an SLR A by the fire with a glass of pigs nose.. oh its been fun!

[Red]

Well... needles to say i got home today an hour before she did and the house smelled fine... we had alot of rain last night and i gues the cross winds + open windows + incense, cleared everything out... Just finished the steak and potatoes SHE COOKED.. (she felt bad for leaving me to fend for myself... and im enjoying an SLR A by the fire with a glass of pigs nose.. oh its been fun!

glad it went well..but a wife rampage coulda been fun for US also :banger

[jerseystepup]

Do i dare ask her if shed mind me nubbing this bad boy in the living room? nahhhh

[icehog3]

Randy lives to smoke another day! :r

[jerseystepup]

I just realized another way i could have gotten around it too in case anyone else is thinking of making this daring move...

while i was outside sitting by the firepit smoking... the windows where open and i guess the way the wind is blowing now the house smells like fresh burned wood... hmmm maybe i can convince her to go to her mothers next weekend...

there is nothing like smoking a cigar alone without a worry in the world and no one to talk to but yourself :)

[longknocker]

Well... needles to say i got home today an hour before she did and the house smelled fine... we had alot of rain last night and i gues the cross winds + open windows + incense, cleared everything out... Just finished the steak and potatoes SHE COOKED.. (she felt bad for leaving me to fend for myself... and im enjoying an SLR A by the fire with a glass of pigs nose.. oh its been fun!

:tu Never Would Have Worked Out That Well For Me, Though!:r

[T.G]

Well... needles to say i got home today an hour before she did and the house smelled fine... we had alot of rain last night and i gues the cross winds + open windows + incense, cleared everything out... Just finished the steak and potatoes SHE COOKED.. (she felt bad for leaving me to fend for myself... and im enjoying an SLR A by the fire with a glass of pigs nose.. oh its been fun!

http://ja.rafi.pl/_images/Whipped_Magazine_for_Men.jpg

[Sr Mike]

...there is nothing like smoking a cigar alone without a worry in the world and no one to talk to but yourself :)
I can just see you sitting on the couch enjoying the smoke and saying to yourself "I am so freaking busted, I need to go build an add-on to the dog's house because I am going to be his roommate if I get caught."

"Yep, no worries!"

"Now where is that hammer?"

[eboniknight]

ok.. now im not allowed to smoke in my house.. (im whipped i know).. Now the womans in VA until tuesday... Being the total child that i am.. i really wanna watch the new simpsons and family guy tonight while enjoying a stick... Think its doable without getting caught? How bad do you think one cigar will stink up everything in my house? She does burn incense so i can use that as a buffer.

I feel your pain bro......but I'm too much of a punk to try that move..LOL. Don't wanna end up sleeping in the garage. :D

[kgoings]

You need to tell her now that she didnt notice it. You proved it to her see! :r

[TheTraveler]

You need to tell her now that she didnt notice it. You proved it to her see! :r

:tpd: I agree 100%. :tu



:D

[Scothew]

Maybe she's waiting for him to fess up. I know thats what my wife does on things.

[slickster81]

To hell with that!

Put the cigars in a vase, and greet her at the door with a rose in your teeth, a bottle of champagne in one hand, glasses in the other. And this look on your face :dr

It might throw her off for a spell....



Make sure you have some flowers delivered with your cigars (or have some placed in a vase). :tu

[Gary]

Absolutely hilarious thread!

New cigar smoker here and the wifey requested that I not smoke in the house, those words were painful to hear.

I've tried fans, opened windows, air fresheners, scented candles. I'm going to clear out my storage shed and turn it into a smoking room.

Funny thread though, I guess its quite common for wives to banish us from smoking in front of the TV on our comfy lazy boy recliners.

[Knip23]

Put a Box fan up and do it now I cant smoke in the house eiter im lucky i can smoke in the man cave. But it all depends on if you like the couch or not?

[kugie]

Go for It!!!
The Bruises will go away, it only hurts for awhile and She'll get over it!!!!

:ss

[Ty Atkinson]

Building a smoking room will probably be cheaper then the divorce! lol

[Namerifrats]

I smoked in my basement around New Years. Wife was with her family for a week, I was home alone. Smoked several, and she didn't really say anything to me about it though she did smell it. The smell was completely gone a day or so after. Just spray some Frebreze, air out the room, and maybe burn a few candles. You'll be fine.