It's Magic Number Time!

[The Poet]

All right, the marathon that is the Major League baseball regular season is in its closing mile, and it is finally time to talk that magic number that is that magic number. So we begin with:

New York Yankees, in the murderous "hate you and the horse Wade Boggs rode out on :tg" AL East = 16.

Detroit Tigers, in the Alphonse/Gaston "you take it, no you take it please ;s" AL Central = 20.

St. Louis Cardinals, in the "doesn't anybody else in this neck of the woods even play the game? :rolleyes:" NL Central = 14.

Let the countdown begin. :ss

[The Poet]

Update:

NY Walkoffs = 15 : Nick picks a Swisher sweet time to start smacking dingers in The Bronx.

Motown Tonys = 19 : Typical of this division, they back further into contention when the Twinkies yield 6 in the 6th.

SL Birds = 13 : Hoffman spits the bit, once mo' proving Mo better.

And our newest entries:

Philadelphia Phillies, in the "first in war, first in peace, and at least we're better than the Nats" NL East = 20. :tf

Brooklyn, uh, I mean Los Angeles Dodgers, in the "can I get a nice Pinot with my sushi taco" NL West = 20. :su

The countdown continues.

[yitlin]

What's the Royals magic number nowadays? 2011?

[The Poet]

What's the Royals magic number nowadays? 2011?

You wish. :r

[The Poet]

Update:

NY Comebacks = 14 : Down 2-0 to up 4-2 when Georgie juiced one. Ho-hum, been there, done that. More important, Jeter ties The Iron Horse with 3-for-4, and when Balfour threw ball four to Jeets in the last AB, he got a booming Bronx cheer for walking The Captain instead of giving him a 3-2 pitch to hit. :r

Motor City Kitties = 18 : "Beep-beeb-beeb-beep-beep-beep-beep"

Archway Tweets = 12 : Pujols pops Brewers' tops.

Philly Full-Of-Themselves = 19 : Hey, whaddaya know? They are one jack better than those aforesaid Nats.

Hollywood&Whiners = 20 : 1 E + 3 W = 1 L, and 0 D.

And our last to the dance:

Disney/Anaheim/Los Angeles/San Jose/Marina del Rey/Bakersfield/Wherever-the-hell-they-claim-to-play-this-season Angels, in the "hey fellas, can we play too?" :banger AL West = 20.

Two continue.

[The Poet]

Update, but no jokes on 9/11 from The Poet:

NYY = 14 : Idle, as was Boston.

DT = 18 : Swept by Royals; Jays edge Twins.

SLC = 12 : Idle, as was Cubs.

PP = 19 : 5 runs in 9th not enough against Nats.

LAD = 20 : Idle; Hot Rockies just 2 back after sweeping Reds.

LAA = 19 : Shut out Mariners to complete sweep.

Continues.

[The Poet]

Update:

NY Jeters = 14 : The Os could not migrate as far north as Fenway, but made it to The Bronx. But neither the loss nor the rain dampened the joy, as The Captain gets his record hit. Meanwhile, Boston lets Rays load 'em up in the 1st, then takes their balls and go home. Hey, they didn't wanna let their girly red sox get wet!

Hitsville Hitlesses = 17 : And the beep goes on. At this point, it seems they may back that garbage truck of theirs right into Yankee Stadium.

Gateway Avians = 12 : Jair Jurrjens (Who? What? Jar-Jar Binks, did you say?) gives Braves the shut-out. Or was it Albert Pool-Hall, dropping balls like Minnesota Fats?

Brotherly Lovelies = 17 : They beat the NY Mehs, while the Fish flounder against the Nahs. It's good to have friends in the basement.

Beverly Hills Bums = 19 : One group of Ex-Iles (Long Island) beat another (Manhattan). Well, guess it ain't 1951 this year.

Tomorrowland Hay-Lows = 18 : Angels are swooping, White Sox are drooping.

The countdown continues.

[The Poet]

Weekend update update:

Big Apple Anakins = 13 : The Chosen Ones salvage one against the ZerOs. Mo gets up then sits down inna 8th, as The Empire bats around and a half, and scores a TD and the 2-point conversion. Meanwhile the Rays are still chum in Fenway, bleeding worse than Schilling's sock.

The Mistakes Between Lakes = 15 : Hey, guess what? The Tigers win the battle of the rookie pitchers against the Jaybirds. That's right, you heard correctly - they actually won a game.

Missouri Breakfast Club = 11 : If these Birds weren't flying so high - and if the Cubbies could shoot worth a damn - this one might have gotten more interesting. However . . . .

Liberty Belles = 14 : Good weekend for the good team in PA - against the bad one in NY. Whatta shock.

Chavez Ravines = 16 : Interesting note - Torre's boys are 20 over .500 against the West, and only 6 over the Rest. Hmmmmm. Does that foretell a troubled future?

Laguna Beach Gidgets = 15 : Another interesting note - the Disneys are 2 UNDER .500 against the West. Don't mean $#!+, you think? Maybe so.

Continues.

[The Poet]

Update:

Tiffany Diamonds = 12 : Yankees steal one from Angels as a close play at 3rd turns into a 2-base fubar.

Windsor Whiz-Katz = 14 : On a roll now, with 2 in a row. It's no mistake, though it was an error. Can anyone stop this GM juggernaut?

Loo City Suets = 10 : Cards have a hitting Halladay - and iffy pitching.

Franklin Junior Mints = 13 : The Fish still flounder, and idle Phils gain one - by keeping Lidge idle, likely.

O'Malley Valley Boys = 14 : Trolley Dodgers beat up on woeful Pirates, while Rockies slide down the mountain.

Tarzana Teacups = 14 : Tomko's complete game shutout of Tejas is a Godsend to Angels. Hey, had he pitched that way earlier, he could have done so in The Bronx instead of Arlington!

Continues.

[The Poet]

Update, but first this word from our sponsor:

It seems T. S. Eliot was no big baseball fan, since obviously it breeds more false hopes than does April. How many teams - well, fans of teams anyway - are thinking today that "Hey, we may not be out of it yet!"

Now back to our regularly scheduled program:

Bronx Zoolanders = 12 : Even the also-rans get up for the Yankees. Yet the most significant effect last night was that the Red Sox helped their foe maintain the lead for best record and home field.

Doctored Detroits = 14 : Lukewarm Twinkies thinking they are just 4 back of tepid Tigers - but that 4 is 5 on the loss side. It is easier to win than make the other lose at a distance.

Riverside Redbirds = 10 : Cubbies have gotten hot, while the Cards are feeling a nip in the air. But 8.5 games in two weeks is asking a lot.

Independence Haulers = 12 : Both the Marlins and Braves have kept pace over last 10 games - however, keeping pace ain't gonna cut it.

Branch Rickities = 12 : What was a race is becoming increasingly rocky for Colorado.

Compton Cherubs = 13 : On-the-road odds catching up with the Angels, and only Ranger ineptitude saving their bacon lately.

Continues.

[The Poet]

Update:

Harlem River Heartbreakers = 11 : It's the same old story; 2 runs in the first, 2 to tie in the 8th, then a walk-off game-winner in the 9th from a pair of their overpaid All Stars - Brett Gardner and Frank Cervelli. Speaking of walk-offs . . .

Laguna Beach Babes = 12 : . . . they get 2 out with none on in Fenway, then closer Fuentes walks one, gives up two weak infield bleeders, strikes out Nick Green twice (according to the Angels anyway) then walks him once to tie, then Gonzalez plops one in front of Juan Rivera, who did not dive for it to try and save the game. Good thing for them that Texas continues in freefall.

Asleep In Detroit Cities = 13 : Tigers continue to back up into October, but Minnesota has other ideas. Yet can they translate them into reality?

Red Blues = 9 : Cards lose, but Cubbies stumble in their last-gasp pitch, and I think that this one's ready for the fork.

Delaware Gaptooths = 11 : When you look at the competiton - Marlins, Braves, Mets, and Senators, uh, Nationals, none of whom having done much this century (if then), where's the shock?

Rodeo Drivers = 11 : Ibid, except it's the Rockies, Giants, Padres, and D'backs.

Continues.

[The Poet]

Update:

Yankee Clippers = 10 : While the idle Yanks were enjoying surf-and-turf with a nice Willamette pinot noir in Seattle's finest last night, Boston loses the first of its 3 games-in-hand -- which is the problem with games-in-hand. You have to win them, or they are just anchors pulling you down. Speaking of anchors - Exit Sandman wannabe.

Yen For Clunkers = 13 : Are the Tiggers circling the field, or circling the drain? We'll know soon enough.

The Second Best Franchise In Baseball = 8 : Cards take night off, but Cubs lose again. It's head-to-head this weekend -- have you found that fork yet?

Rittenhouse Squares = 10 : Phils double-up on Nats. Why don't they pick on somebody their own size?

Antelope Freeway Freaks = 11 : And pretty much the same story here, with a win over Pirates on Manny Bobblehead Day. Question is, how could they tell the dolls from the real bobblehead?

Watts Towers = 11 : Angels visit Arlington now, which helps the Yankees either way. If they lose, it helps for home-field advantage, and if they win it helps assure Yanks of at least the wild card.

Continues.

[The Poet]

Update:

NY All-Stars = 10 : Yes, Mo is human after all, and blew his 2nd save of the season. But why didn't Joe have him walk Ichiro, what with 1st base open, I wanna know.

Delirium Tremens = 13 : The Tigers drunken stagger towards October has put them only 3 above the Twinkies.

Saint Louie Flewies = 6 : Big shocker here, as Cards beat sinking Cubs. If you've not found your fork yet, I'll let you borrow mine.

Chestnut Streeters = 8 : And 9 games better in the loss side over both Marlins and Braves. I think I need my fork back.

Ebbets Westfields = 10 : Pain and gain, as Dodgers and Rockies lose.

Pasadena Puttis = 9 : Win over Rangers helps them and the BoSox.

Continues.

[The Poet]

Weekend update update update:

Metro Road Wearies = 9 : The Jets slap the Pats, the Giants poke the Cowboys, and the Mets bite the Nats - for what that's worth. Now if only the Yankees could win a couple we could kick this party off proper.

Ford Edsels = 11 : Tigers avoid a sweep in the HHHH, and are glad to see the last of it. And, just like the Edsel, they are not really as bad as people think - they merely never got going in a tight market.

Redbirds = 4 : With that 10-game lead, they can go 4 of 10 without leaking blood -- especially as Cubbies ain't doing any cutting to speak of, unless you mean Milton Bradley.

Rocky Balboas = 6 : Only the Braves have made any attempt to move, yet the Phils have kept their lead. What a shocker - this one could have been called in April.

LA ExLax = 8 : Rockies stop sliding downhill, but likely too little too late.

Tinkerbells = 7 : And the Strangers 7 down on the loss side. Turn the oven down, and set the timer.

Continues.

[The Poet]

Update:

NY Stinkies = 8 : Lately, if the pitching's good, the hitting sucks, and if the hitters do their job the pitchers blow up. Oh well, the lead's still there, and Boston has likely made its move already. Don't want that fork yet, but hopefully soon.

GM Recalls = 11 : Tigers idle - which is probably a good thing - but the Twins were not. A lead of 2.5 games in this putrid division means nothing either way.

Arch Rivals = 3 : Cubbies couldn't gain 10 games against Hickory Crawdads this late. It's all over but for Pinella's weeping.

Schuykill Skulkers = 6 : Idle last night, but can land the Fish by taking 2 today. Plus the Braves are ripe for the chopping block also - especially if the NY Nyets can get to Jar-Jar.

Melrose First-Placers = 8 : Tough roadtrip for the Dodgers now - against the Nats, the Pirates, and the Padres. Sheesh.

Rancho Cucamongas = 6 : Angels pitch Santana tonight (no, not that one, and not Carlos either), who has lost his last 4 starts, against Gaudin (and Yanks have won all 4 of his starts). Mean anything? I'll let you know tomorrow.

Continues.

[The Poet]

Update, with footnote:

(x) Major Deegan Expressways = 6 : Well, it wasn't pretty, but Yankees finally beat Angels in - where the heck do they claim to play this week? Good night all around, with Tejas losing and Yanks winning to clinch playoffs twice within an hour (after an interminable haitus of a whole year) Boston dropping another to the powerful Royals, Jeter getting 200th hit for 7th season, and Mo bouncing back with 41st save.

Michigan Puddytats = 10 : Two wins in a row now, to stay 2.5 ahead of Twinkies. Things are (yawnnnnn) heating up here.

West St. Louis Boogaloos = 2 : As this could end tonight, not much more to say here. It shall end, and soon.

Ardmore PawPaws = 5 : Braves jump over Marlins, but will not catch the Phils.

101 90210s = 7 : Dodgers edge Gnats 14-2. Think they needed to save some runs for the other 2 games? I don't.

Glendale Trainwrecks = 5 : Angels need to send a fruitbasket up to Oakland for the help, and maybe Boston should chip in too.

(x) = clinched playoff spot

Continues.

[The Poet]

Update, with still just one footnote:

(x) Macombs Dam Yankees = 5 : Another playoff-atmosphere win against Angels, with more subs than the Russian mothball fleet. Boston takes one in KC, but needs the game-in-hand tonight if they want this weekend in The Bronx to mean more than bragging rights.

Fisher Bodies = 9 : And the Tigers finally get this to single-digits by whuppin' up on the Tribe - extending their losing streak to 10. Yeah, big whup.

Busch Leaguers = 1 : No joy in Minute Maid Mudville last night, but they can back in this evening - well, this morning for most of us - if Bad Penny and the Giants can dump Dempster and the Cubs.

Pattison Ave. Putzes = 5 : Phils are trying their damnest to keep this one interesting, but really, who cares besides them?

Bel Airheads = 6 : Had Rockies gone 6-4 instead of 4-6 they may have made this one a bit more dicey for Torre's boys. However, if wishes were dishes we'd all be in Chinatown.

Santa Anas = 5 : Now that the pressure of the wild-card race is off the Rangers' rednecks, they can get back to winning games again. It won't keep the Angels out, but it will - well, actually, it won't do much for anybody'd be my guess.

(x) = clinched playoff spot

Continues.

[The Poet]

Update, and STILL just one footnote:

(x) Concourse Grandees = 5 : New York idle, and Boston wins second game-in-hand to get split with Royals. Now the fun starts. It's not realistic for Yankees to expect a sweep in The Bronx, but Red Sox almost have to. If Yanks win even one game, then Sox are looking at running their table while hoping Yanks go 1-5, or at best 2-4, against KC and Tampa Bay.

River Rouges = 8 : Oh boy, the Tigers are smoking now with a 4-game streak - and actually wins this time. Yet we still have to wait to see who blinks first, or last.

The Ville Viles = 1 : Cubbies stave off one more night with 2 in the 9th against SF, which gives Cards 2 shots this evening - one orally, one rectally.

Kings Of Prussia = 4 : If Phils can can Brewers tonight, they will all but wrap this up - and maybe they better, as they cannot count on help with Braves/Nats or Marlins/Mets games. Now THAT'S all butt, if you're asking me.

Alhambra Castles = 4 : Think they can end this joke against Pirates and Padres? Who set up this schedule anyway? As I said above - sheesh.

Garden Grover Clevelands = 4 : Travel day yesterday, for that long haul to Oakland, but the As smacked Rangers for them. Don't think they needed the help - this one was toast before.

(x) = clinched playoff spot

Continues.

[The Poet]

Update, and STILL STILL just one footnote:

(x) Joltin' Joe Girardis = 3 : Yanks knock Lester out early, figuratively and literally. Glad the kid only has a bruised quad after that liner to his knee - he's had enough trouble in his life already. And it's too early to say that Joba rules, but he did pitch very well in a game that was not as close as the final.

Hamtramck OffTracks = 8 : Twinkies only 2 back of Tigers again, who have to host them for 4 sandwiched between White Sox. Boys, we have us a race here! OK, I heard that - who said "Who cares?"

Kosciusko Foul Poles = 1 : Are the Cards being cards, trying to make this interesting? Well, it ain't workin'. Get it over with already, fer Kris'sakes.

Bryn Marginals = 4 : The Braves are doing their best to make it a race, and the Phils are co-operating. It's too little too late, yet you have to give Hot'Lanta props.

McArthur Parks = 4 : One loss is no meltdown, but against the Pitts? Gimme a break here - what exactly are you dodging?

Orange Picos = 4 : A loss at home against the bottom-feeding A's is not earth-shaking, but it's not San Andreas' fault that the Angels have been playing .500 ball for a month now. Can you say Lucifer?

(x) = clinched playoff spot.

Continues.

[The Poet]

Weekend update, with footnotes, plural, finally:

(y) New York Yankees = 0 : Pretty nice weekend in The Apple. Jets, Giants, Mets - oh, and yeah, the Yanks sweep Boston to grab the AL East. Want some symmetry numbers? NY gets 100th win, wins East, wins overall best AL record, and after starting the season 0-8 against Red Sox end up with 9-9 record. You want more? Cano joins Jeter with 200th hit, Teixeira gets 120th RBI with 38th HR, and Mo earns 44th save from where he belongs - on the mound when they clinch. Oh, and Yankees go through 300 bottles of "Whatever" champagne in 20 minutes. It's party time - until next week.

Rambler Wrecks = 6 : Twins blew a chance to cut this lead to 1 stinkin' game, but can still leapfrog Tigers with a sweep starting tonight, or tie with 3 of 4. Hmmmm. As I said at the top, the Alphonse/Gaston division is open to anyone who wants it - if anyone ever decides that they do.

(y) St. Louis Cardinals = 0 : The Redbirds back in, and Cubbies "wait 'til next millenium" nightmare continues. Didn't know that Cardinals could fly backwards, did you?

Main Line Septics = 3 : Braves still pushing, but Phillies actually win a game - against sub .500 Brewers. This one's over, but Philly does not look good at this point.

(x) Gardena Weedies = 1 : And since they have already lost their 3rd against the Pirates today, while Rockies are idle, it will be 1 again tomorrow too. You think Torre's a bit cheesed that his Dodgers have scored only 2 total runs in 2 of those 3 losses to the Pitts? The power report from LA is a total blackout. Well, at least they've clinched a wild-card.

Yorba Lindas = 2 : Angels top A's, Rays edge Rangers. Not much more to say here. With all the contenders except Yankees and Twins going 5-5 lately, all the juice is lemon.

(x) = clinched playoff spot ; (y) = clinched division title

Continues, for a bit longer.

[The Poet]

Update, redacted, with footnote:

NYY = AL East Champs

SLC = NL Central Champs

'Nuff said there.

(y) Los Angeles (this season) Angels = 0 : LA crushes Rangers 11-zip to kill 2 with one stoning. Yet they'd better turn things around in this last week if they plan to see much of October baseball anywhere but the tube.

(x) La Brea Tarpits = 1 : Earlier I was so bold as to denigrate MLB nabobs for scheduling Gnats and Pitts so late against the Dodgers, but with them going 3-4 in those games it seems clinching the NL West is what they're dodging. I confess my sin, yet is it "mea culpa" or "they'a culpa"? Your call.

Walt Whitmans = 3 : Phillies keep diddling around, and Braves still on warpath - but unless Phils are channelling the Mets, and Atlanta receives some divine intervention, the only thing at stake here is pride.

Wyandotte WhyNots = 6 : PPD/rain with Twins last night, which rarely happens in the Metrodome, but did happen in the Motor City. Double-Dip today, which baseball pundits say favors the Tigers since it's hard to win a double-header. I admit I never quite got that. Don't they play them one atta time? And if it's hard for Twinkies to win 2, is it not also hard for the Tigers too? Oh, BTW, the first game just ended, and Twins win in 10 innings to move within 1 game of drowning Kitties. Thus I repeat - hmmmm.

(x) = clinched playoff spot; (y) = clinched division title

Continues, for what appears to be too much longer still.

[The Poet]

Update, w/footnote and addendum:

NYY = AL East Champs

SLC = NL Central Champs

LAA = AL West Champs

Windsor Losesirs = 4 : Tigers win the nightcap, barely, and cut number by a third. But both they and the Twins are still do-or-die, though the onus is on the Twinkies. If they take these next two in Detroit it's Katy bar the door.

Camden Yardbirds = 1 : Braves end hot streak with a loss, and Phillies actually win a game. This could end tonight. This could make us suffer for another day or three. Me, I don't much care either way.

(x) Elysian Park Fielders = 1 : Make that "3 up and 5 down" against the bottom-feeders of the NL (well, actually, the Padres are slightly above the D'backs, but who's counting?). Joe Torre didn't have a lot of hair to start with, and will look like Don Zimmer before the Dodgers finally end this pain.

Addendum:

(x) Yawkey Wayfarers back their Big Poopies into wildcard with their 5th loss in a row, thanks to the Angels victory and Texas's continued collapse, and celebrate behind closed doors with the champagne - of bottled beer. Boston better add some 'jo to their mo' quickly if they don't want LA to run them out of October, figuratively and literally.

(x) = Clinched playoff spot

Yeah, you know - continues.

[The Poet]

Update, w/oblgatory footnotes:

NYY = Al East Champs

SLC = NL Central Champs

LAA = AL Wast Champs

BRS = AL Wild Card

Belle Isle Belles = 2 : Detroit won last night, but lost today big, 13-7. Guess Minnesota missed the PAT. Twins leave town the same way they entered, 2 games back, but with only 3 to go this should be over - however, considering it's the AL Central, who knows?

(y) Philadelphia Phillies = 0 : Well, whaddaya know? As crappy as Phils have been playing, they join the few who haven't backed into the playoffs with their win last night against Astros. Congratulations to the defending WS champions. Now let's see what they can do now that it counts. If they only had their closer from last year, and not this Lidge fellow, they could have a shot at repeating.

(x) Angelino Lows = 1 : Madre mia, another loss, to the Padres this time. In case you haven't noticed, Rockies are only 2.5 behind, and just 2 in the loss column. It is likely too late for Dodgers to grab the wild card away from Colorado, but if they keep trying as hard as this, they just might.

(x) = Clinched playoff spot; (y) = Clinched division championship

Continues.

[colimo]

watch out for my rockies....they clinched at least the wild card and can still win the division with 3 more wins....best record in baseball since new manager took over in June....

they are going to sneak up on people....

If im a philly or card....be very afraid

[The Poet]

Update, with footnote and addendum:

NYY = AL East Champs

SLC = NL Central Champs

LAA = AL West Champs

BRS = AL Wild Card

PP = NL East Champs

Harper Woods Tigers = 2 : No, not Tiger Woods, Harper. Detroit finishes up hosting the White Sox, who are meh this season, while Twins face the Royals, who are sub-meh this millenium. A win here, a loss there, and it's done - yet it would not shock me to see this torture continue.

(x) Forest Lawn Caretakers = 1 : And apparently what they are taking care for is ending this season. You might recall that, for a good amount of time, Dodgers had the best record in baseball and were on cruise control. Well lately they have lost control - which is not only dangerous on LA freeways, but has left a door open for . . .

(x) Coors Lights = N/A : However, as Doug notes, Rockies are hot and LA is not, and they go head-to-head with only 2 games between them. Colorado is in regardless, but a sweep would mean the flip-flop here. Further, although it is unlikely, note that they have the same record as Cards and only one win/loss worse than Phils, so it is just barely possible Rockies could end up with the best NL record and home-field advantage for first 2 rounds. Yet don't bet the farm on that one - and don't bet the farm they'd even survive that long anyway.

(x) = Clinched playoff spot

Continues.

[The Poet]

Update, with footnote and kudo:

NYY = AL East Champs

SLC = NL Central Champs

LAA = AL West Champs

BRS = AL Wild Card

PP = NL East Champs

Melvin Dales = 2 : As in Chip 'n Dale, although it's really still the same old Alphonse/Gaston crap we've come to expect, and loath. With 2 games left for both teams, Twinkies are but 1 game back. They have no margin for error while Tigers can lose one, if they dare. You know, this would be exciting - if anyone truly thought either one had a legitimate shot in the playoffs. And speaking of being 1 game back . . .

(x) Griffith Observatories = 1 : . . . though it does not take a telescope for the Dodgers to see the Rockies in their rearview mirror, as they are only 1 game back after their victory last night. If you're looking for some fun this weekend, it's in Chavez Ravine, where Colorado needs both games to extend their streak to 7 Ws, LA's to 7 Ls, and jump them like that celebrated frog. Both teams are in regardless, but it makes for meaningful baseball pre-post-season.

(x) Wazee St. Wazoos = N/A : ibid.

(x) = Clinched playoff spot

Kudos need be offered to B.J. Upton for his performance last night in the Rays victory over the Yankees. Although it meant little except for a bit of pride, as this is the only October baseball the defending AL champions will enjoy this season, one cannot overlook his 5-for-5, 6 RBIs, and - oh yeah - hitting for the cycle, the first in Tampa Bay history. Give the young man a hand, ladies and gents.

Continues, for one more weekend update.

[The Poet]

Final weekend update, with footnotes, kudo and lament:

NYY = AL East Champs

SLC = NL Central Champs

LAA = AL West Champs

BRS = AL Wild Card

PP = NL East Champs

(y) Los Angeles Dodgers = 0 : Finally. After holding a six-game lead with seven to play, the Dodgers at last stopped dodging their NL West Championship and actually beat the Colorado Rockies - twice, even! Good golly Miss Molly, they eventually balled, which means . . .

(x) Colorado Rockies = Lost their way into the NL Wild Card, yet you've got to give them props for giving some late excitement to this race that never should have been - unlike the one I so brilliantly predicted . . .

Detroit/Minnesota = 1 : Alphonse, meet Gaston. Shake hands, have a clean fight, and may the lesser lousy team win. Oh, and if anyone is interested (I'm not, but that's another issue), I understand that Bucky Dent is available for a 1-day contract.

(y) = Clinched division championship

(x) = Clinched wildcard spot

Just as kudos were earned by Upton, I feel everybody's favorite boo-who Alex Rodriguez deserves a bump here. Not only did A-Rod have 7 RBIs with 2 HRs, and all in the same inning, but by doing so he helped the Yankees set a new team record for HRs in a season, and on a personal note he ended his regular season with a symmetrical 30 HRs and 100 RBIs - this after missing the first 6 weeks of the year due to his surgery, thus making his next 6 weeks be in effect his spring training. Plus, to add to the symmetry, note this trivia point - when A-Rod returned to the team after rehab, he hit the very first pitch he saw for a home run. Yesterday, he hit the very last pitch he saw for a home run. How often does that happen?

I need lament the fact here that the season is not yet over, thanks to the mediocrity of the AL Central. As Ozzie Guillen himself stated earlier this year, while his White Sox were struggling on the road, "We are losing all these games, but not losing any ground - that's because we ALL suck!". Now, don't get me wrong - there's nothing wrong per se with a one-game playoff to end the season, but it should be a game between teams that have some juice and history - Yanks/Red Sox, Dodgers/Giants, Cards/Reds, Braves/Mets - but who the heck beside their fans give a damn about Tigers/Twins? Just my :2 , but as this is my lament, that's all that matters.

May or may not continue.

[The Poet]

Final final update update:

NYY = AL East Champs

SLC = NL Central Champs

LAA = AL West Champs

BRS = AL Wild Card

PP = NL East Champs

LAD = NL West Champs

CR = NL Wild Card

Detroit . . . no, no, Minnesota Twins = 0 : Well, the Tigers kept backing up, backing up, backing up, trying their best to back into The Bronx, and eventually ended up backing out of it completely. Seems 162 games were not enough to settle this division, and turned out even 163 wasn't enough either - it took 163 1/3 games. Congratulations to the Twinkies, who fought hard for the last 20+ games to make this happen. As for the Tigers, who either led or was tied for the lead for 5 months, and who had a 7-game lead this time last month - well, you're not the 1951 Brooklyn Dodgers, so there's that, yet you and your fans have to be hurting now. But look on the bright side: Not only did you have an exciting run and finish - your magic number for 2010 is only 163.

So this is finally set, and as I post it has already begun - Colorado and Philly are scoreless after 3. Pick your teams, root for your favorites, and if you have no dog in this fight - well, wait 'til next year. Enjoy.