Let's talk about gnomes...

[ucla695]

Every time my wife sees a Travelocity commercial she talks about how cute the gnome is. Ok, I was luke warm on the idea...decent marketing tool...helps you get into the pitch...whatever. :rolleyes: That was UNTIL one showed up in the back today. WTF? That little guy stared at me all evening as I enjoyed a couple of cigars while grilling some corn, sausages and porterhouse steaks. I even put a little pair of sunglasses on the dude so I couldn't tell he was giving me the stare down. It didn't help. Straight up disturbing!! That's all I have to say.

Anyone else have a problem with them? :D If you do, keep it down so he doesn't hear. :r

[leasingthisspace]

They are freaking creepy. I feel for you.

[HK3-]

Get some pink flamingos to hang out with him. When she complains about them, you have made your point. :tu

[Texan in Mexico]

The Gnomes can be very powerful beings.

In my one of the most comprehensive economic books written, The Money Game, they talk about the power the Swiss Gnomes have. You see they control the gold bullion in Switzerland thereby controlling many of the world's currencies and possibly affecting national elections and public policy in most of the Western world.

So in other worlds, treat him with respect and ask him if he has any family in Switzerland.

[markem]

Be careful that it isn't a gnome with swine flu. You can never be too careful.

[M1903A1]

Turn it to face your least favorite neighbors. Let THEM freak out over being stared down! :r

[HK3-]

Does it have an upside down triangle on it's head? :r

http://i255.photobucket.com/albums/hh153/megamp3n/TeletubbiesTheAlbum.jpg

[MedicCook]

Get one of those wooden owl's for it to play with.

[Texan in Mexico]

Be careful that it isn't a gnome with swine flu. You can never be too careful.

Dont invoke the Mexican Gnomes or as they are called here - Aluxes!

[MajorCaptSilly]

Garden Gnomes have been plotting world domination for many years. I have chronicled my war with the Gnomes on alt.smokers.pipes.

MCS

[bonjing]

give it a cigar :ss

[Texan in Mexico]

Garden Gnomes have been plotting world domination for many years. I have chronicled my war with the Gnomes on alt.smokers.pipes.

MCS

Some have been known to drive black Suburbans. I bet they are band that Black Band Project!

[ucla695]

give it a cigar :ss

That's why he was staring at me!! He wants to partake of the forbidden leaf.. I'm going to reach into the Stinky and duct tape a nub to him. Better yet, I think he wants a Chico. Do I have to light it for him? :ss

He still haunts me. :ss

[kzm007]

Lop a hole into the back of his head and use him discreetly for a backup Stinky.

[Emjaysmash]

I think he's trying to bewitch you. Take this Punch Cutter of Anti-Bewitchment. It gives you a +3 modifier to your save vs. spell!

[taltos]

That's why he was staring at me!! He wants to partake of the forbidden leaf.. I'm going to reach into the Stinky and duct tape a nub to him. Better yet, I think he wants a Chico. Do I have to light it for him? :ss

He still haunts me. :ssGnomes only smoke Cremosas. This is why they are so mean and dangerous.

[gnukfu]

Lisa, my wife, has decided she likes gnomes. I have gnomes all over the yard, a gnome bench arrived yesterday, but I do love my Red Sox gnome!....reminds me of Dustin Pedroia!

[leasingthisspace]

One day your going to go out and your dog will be missing and you'll see this.
http://farm1.static.flickr.com/196/514587134_2fbdd5212b.jpg


Never talk bad about them.

http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f292/farmfaerie/gnomes/493b7539.jpg

[dunng]

http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2008/11/funny-pictures-the-lawn-gnomes-have-beaten-the-pink-flamingos.jpg

[Thaplumbr]

I think he's trying to bewitch you. Take this Punch Cutter of Anti-Bewitchment. It gives you a +3 modifier to your save vs. spell!

Man,I just had a flashback to junior high:r

[BlackDog]

Give the gnome one of these to keep it company. :D

http://www.fantasylawnornaments.com/1lg3FancyLadyBum.jpg

[CBI_2]

I think he's trying to bewitch you. Take this Punch Cutter of Anti-Bewitchment. It gives you a +3 modifier to your save vs. spell!
:r:r

[ucla695]

http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2008/11/funny-pictures-the-lawn-gnomes-have-beaten-the-pink-flamingos.jpg

There goes that idea. I'm a parrothead so I'll have to use parrots and make sure they're perched somewhere high where the gnomes can't get to them. Tiki Bar perhaps. :ss

Lop a hole into the back of his head and use him discreetly for a backup Stinky.

Ooh, I like this idea. Tons of possibilities there.

I think he's trying to bewitch you. Take this Punch Cutter of Anti-Bewitchment. It gives you a +3 modifier to your save vs. spell!
:r

Gnomes only smoke Cremosas. This is why they are so mean and dangerous.

:r Man, I guess I'm going to have to post a WTB Cremosas thread. :r

[ucla695]

Lisa, my wife, has decided she likes gnomes. I have gnomes all over the yard, a gnome bench arrived yesterday, but I do love my Red Sox gnome!....reminds me of Dustin Pedroia!


I could live with a Sox gnome! :tu Has Dustin made the jump from gnomedome to the humanity?

[Ranger_B]

I say embrace the gnome. Poor it a drink give it a cigar and befriend it. Then once you have let him feel he is part of the family introduce him to your other friends the termites.

[Emjaysmash]

This might help too...

http://g-ec2.images-amazon.com/images/I/6143BAPZZML._AA240_.jpg

[cort]

:r Nice thread Mike.

I have a smokin gnome out back. It's not colored so hes not to scary. He just sits there smokin on his pipe all day mindin his own business. I always wonder what he is doing while I am at work??

[ucla695]

:r Nice thread Mike.

I have a smokin gnome out back. It's not colored so hes not to scary. He just sits there smokin on his pipe all day mindin his own business. I always wonder what he is doing while I am at work??

:r:r This little guy has a shovel. That's the scary part. What's he going to bury? ? Me? I think they just sit there waiting to be activated and will attack us all!!! It'll be a special on TV...."When good gnomes go bad." :eek:

[WildBlueSooner]

I had a bad dream about this one

http://images.wikia.com/uncyclopedia/images/thumb/8/86/Evil_gnome.jpg/180px-Evil_gnome.jpg

[gnukfu]

This is the one I have!!!

http://i264.photobucket.com/albums/ii190/gnukfu/45-14668-F.jpg

[dunng]

I think I need this one... :tu

http://services.bostonglobe.com/mas_assets/full/GNNF08TMNP.jpg

[Scimmia]

Careful around those gnomes, they like to steal underpants

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/d/dd/Gnomes_plan.png

[BMTA]

Just hope it's not the beggining of a collection!

[ucla695]

I'm afraid it is, but look at this...


http://i425.photobucket.com/albums/pp333/ucla695/41R0J-b8SoL_SS400_.jpg

This Steel Curtain gnomey should be able to the other guy in check. :D That is until he turns on me. They still creep me out. :eek:

[cort]

This is Gary's gnome. I buried him in the backyard and now I am the man of the house. Once you other gnomes finish your part in taking over the world post it here.

All Hail Gnomitron

[SeanGAR]

Gnomes are good eatin'.

http://www.filipino-food-lovers.com/site-images/pinoy_bbq/pinoy_bbq1.jpg

Here is some Filipino gnome on the grill. I first simmer the gnome meat for a couple of hours in a court bouillon then grill with some mesquite wood.

You haven't lived until you've had mesquite grilled gnome.

I don't know much about the legality of importing gnome meat from the Philippines ... I haven't had an order nabbed by USDA inspectors yet :-). From what I understand, they just send you a notice that your gnome is illegal since it has not been processed in a USDA inspected plant .. and take the meat to the next USDA herf no doubt..

[md4958]

I just dress up Bao in a pointed hat and shoes and tell him to stand in the garden. :tu

[ucla695]

They're starting to come after us....

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article902014.ece

Gnomes are good eatin'.

http://www.filipino-food-lovers.com/site-images/pinoy_bbq/pinoy_bbq1.jpg

Here is some Filipino gnome on the grill. I first simmer the gnome meat for a couple of hours in a court bouillon then grill with some mesquite wood.

You haven't lived until you've had mesquite grilled gnome.

I don't know much about the legality of importing gnome meat from the Philippines ... I haven't had an order nabbed by USDA inspectors yet :-). From what I understand, they just send you a notice that your gnome is illegal since it has not been processed in a USDA inspected plant .. and take the meat to the next USDA herf no doubt..

:r:r

I just dress up Bao in a pointed hat and shoes and tell him to stand in the garden.

:r:r